Shuttlecock! Part X - Forfeit! Racquet Smash!

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No spoken words said:
Help a brother out and pick something.

ETA - is the site 100% up to date with lyrics? If you do not choose something, and I do, I'd hate to pick something that's already been done.
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Not even close. Here are my undocumented ones:

If God Will Serve His Shuttles
Staring at the Cock
Cock (Not Coming Down)
Dirty Play
The Referee

And that's just what I remember.

Most of them take one of three complexions: badminton, Lance's Mom, or KNIFE CRIME. Pick what you're interested in and I'll choose a song accordingly.



By the way, in my Constitutional Design seminar right now we're likening the electoral college to the BCS and talking about how much they both suck and have screwed us. Thought you'd like that.
 
Did anything of actual Shuttlecock importance happen here last night or this morning that I missed? Any news? Any performances? Any anything? Was anyone pwn3d in the harshest of ways in the thread? (if so, please let it be that Elfa character!)
 
u2popmofo said:
Did anything of actual Shuttlecock importance happen here last night or this morning that I missed? Any news? Any performances? Any anything? Was anyone pwn3d in the harshest of ways in the thread? (if so, please let it be that Elfa character!)
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I have not been pwn3d within the last 24 hours good sir, although I'm sure my time is coming...
 
impy13 said:
Not even close. Here are my undocumented ones:

If God Will Serve His Shuttles
Staring at the Cock
Cock (Not Coming Down)
Dirty Play
The Referee

And that's just what I remember.

Most of them take one of three complexions: badminton, Lance's Mom, or KNIFE CRIME. Pick what you're interested in and I'll choose a song accordingly.



By the way, in my Constitutional Design seminar right now we're likening the electoral college to the BCS and talking about how much they both suck and have screwed us. Thought you'd like that.
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I'd like to focus on KNIFE CRIME, as evidenced by my only contribution thus far, a little tune called: KNIFE CRIME.
 
A self choking for the ages!

Alright, get to work on "Shadows and Stabbings" or "Sunday Bloody Service." "The Wandering Ball Boy" could also be made interesting with references to all three of the Shuttlecock themes.
 
impy13 said:
A self choking for the ages!

Alright, get to work on "Shadows and Stabbings" or "Sunday Bloody Service." "The Wandering Ball Boy" could also be made interesting with references to all three of the Shuttlecock themes.
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Actually, SBS might find me going down a Lance's Mom journey. Stay tuned. I lack the skill of yourself, Laz or LM, but I'll try.
 
The first 1:00 of that Winter clip made me think I got Ric'Rolled into some Cockplay song. Those synth strings remind me WAY to much of Viva la Velveeta.

And it also sounds like a remake of City of Blinding Cocks?
 
Well, here's Sunday Bloody Service.

If it sucks, feel free to tweak it or dismiss it outright. I lack your gift for this...haiku is more my thing.

I can't believe my sores today
I can't close my eyes and make them go away.
How long, how long must she touch my schlong?
How long, how long?
'Cos tonight
She’ll bang more than one, tonight.

Broke clients of any color or race
Cold sores strewn across her entire face
But she will still bang them all
They put her back up, put her back up against the wall.

Sunday, bloody Service.
Sunday, bloody Service.
Sunday, bloody Service.
Sunday, bloody Service.
Oh, let's go.

And the role playing’s just begun
There's many whips, but tell me is this fun?
Part Dominatrix, part tart
And salesmen, doctors, lawyers, fry cooks
Torn apart.

Sunday, bloody Service.
Sunday, bloody Service.

How long, how long must she touch my schlong?
How long, how long?
'Cos tonight
'She’ll do more than one, tonight.
Sunday, bloody Service.
Sunday, bloody Service.

Drop the knife from your hand
Put your knife away.
I'll put your knife away.
I'll swipe your knife away.
I'll swipe your bloodshot hand.
Sunday, bloody Service.
Sunday, bloody Service.

And I wish I was immune
To syphilis and all forms of VD.
And today the millions cry
We sleep with her, then tomorrow we die.

The real battle just begun
To claim the victory Namkcur won
On...

Sunday, bloody Service.
Sunday, bloody Service.
 
I Will Return

I will return!

I was on the baseline when you sent
You sent that cock to me
I was looking at the net
Lost in badminton jubilee

Ball boy plays hard just like man
He holds a birdie in his hand
When he stops to drink, Ben-Gay apply
On thigh

If you serve away, serve away
I serve away, serve away...I will return

If you serve away, serve away
I serve away, serve away...I will return

I was on the frontline
When they raised the net from ground
I was looking at the grandstands
My life's calling was found

Serve away, serve away
I serve away, serve away...I will return
If you serve away, serve away
I serve away, serve away...I will return
I will return

Your shots fly in spirals
I try to lob and not err
Your shots, your shots...

If you serve away, serve away
I serve away, serve away...I will return

If you serve away, serve away
I serve away, serve away...I will return

I will return
I will return...


Not too terribly good, but I just watch to finish Ball Boy.
 
Perfectly anthemic.

And here's another one courtesy of myself and Impy. We're like the Lobbin'/McCockney of Shuttlecock.

SO COCKY

You crossed the line
Now serve it over
It doesn't matter unless
You double fault
We're catching up
But still losing
I'm only playing on
To watch them go down
My court!

I disappeared in cock
Cock disappeared from me
I served for everything you ever returned
It wasn't what you returned

The teams who play you, you hate the most
They play right through you like a ghost
They look for calls, but your shuttle is in the air
Birdie--it's nowhere

Oh...lob...
You say in badminton I'm too jocky
Oh...lob...
Sweet partner,
You're so cocky

Desperation is a tender net
It blocks you every time
You put your racquet to the cock
To stop the fly

The bird is pale like God's only goose
Swings like an angel from a noose
Then they make you stretch your racquet arm loose
And you down some Powerjuice

Oh...lob...
You say in badminton I'm too jocky
Oh...lob...
Sweet partner,
You're so cocky

She holds the line like a full-court press
Her hips say one thing
Arm movement something else
Oh love, like a post-match shower
Love...crying at the ref tower...(FOUL!)

You don't want a Donaghy scandal
Can't go left but her strong hand will
Eyes on birdie, fingers on the handle

Shuttlecock sailing, you can't keep up
The hope your team will make the cut
Between the merits of lob and smash
We are challenged on our feet

Oh...lob...
You say in badminton I'm too jocky
Oh...lob...
Sweet partner,
You're so cocky

Oh...love...
More play with you would be too rocky
Sweet partner
You're so cocky
 
Winter is just on the DVD that's in the box set? Or is it actually a bonus track on the actual NLOTH CD that comes with the box set?

This is what happens when I try and stay somewhat shielded from cock during the lead-up to the release date. I have no idea what's going on.
 
I don't think it's going to be one of the exclusive/bonus b-sides, on non-standard versions of the CD, iTunes, whatever.

Which is fine, if they're saving it for LP 13.
 
Alright, I'm updating the site's lyrics now. I have missed three days in a row due to being ill as far as updating the Cock goes.
 
I am having an incredibly difficult time figuring out who wrote all of the songs, who came up with each song title, who came up with each album title, etc. Any help would be appreciated.
 
Shadows and Stabbings

Creeping the cold restless streets at night
I listen to "Reckoner" throughout the night
Streets of red bloodlet
A gravestone to be made
Another one down
It's always the same
He sings to me now
With one lazy eye
Are the leaves on treefingers
Leaving me high and dry
I lurk street, pain inflicting comedy
I'll stalk kids again
To the "Street Spirit" melody

But I know, oh no
But I know, oh no
But I know

Shadows and stabbings
Shadows and stabbings
Shadows and stabbings
Shadows and stabbings

Knife in a shadow
Causing you pain
Mr. Noel's wounds are always the same
I lurk street, pain inflicting comedy
I'll stalk kids again
To the "Street Spirit" melody

But I know, oh no
But I know, oh no
But I know

...out there...

Do you feel in your torso
Anything piercing
Any unpleasant feeling
My knife, like a ureter
Is hanging from your kidney

But I know, oh no
But I know, oh no
But I know

Shadows and stabbings
Shadows and stabbings
Shadows and stabbings
Shadows and stabbings
Shadow...shadow...shadow
Shadow...shadow...shadow
Shadows and stabbings
Shadows and stabbings
Beware my shadow...shadow...shadow
It's only my shadow...shadow...shadow
Shadows and stabbings
Shadows and stabbings
 
Piff, going down the list, I remember writing these:

I Will Return
An Cock Dubh
Into the Net
Stories for Ball Boys
The Birdie
Shadows and Stabbings

The Referee

Cock Station
So Cocky (mostly Laz, but I still get a songwriting credit and haaaaalf the publishing)

Dirty Play

Staring at the Cock
Cock (Not Coming Down)

Magnificock
Moment of Service
Unkown Partner
White as Talcum


I think giving credit for song titles is going to be a huge undertaking, having to look through all the threads. I say just ignore those and put it who wrote the actual song itself.
 
martha said:
I was at a funeral yesterday, and I'm sick as fucking dog today, yet working. :scratch:

FlVE DAYS.
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You shouldn't be spreading your germs to the children.

/germ police

Go home, stay home, let an unemployed temp make a little money.

New 'Cock has some healing powers, you know. :mac: After listening to Magnificock, my Chihuahua threw up that blue ear plug.
 
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