well maybe i don't "look the part"
i'm not "svelt"
i don't "look comfortbale on camera"
i don't "understand what's going on in the news"
i'm not "likeable"
i don't "get along with people"
i don't "wear the latest clothes"
or even ones that "don't reek"
i don't "change my underwear"
i don't "exercise"
and when i do sweat i don't "shower"
i don't "clean my crotch"
i "make baby's cry"
i... i'm flying... i'm flying!!! holy schnikes somebody save me
ooooooookeeyyyyy dokey my name is matt foley. and i am a motivational speaker. first off i am 35 years old, i am thrice divorced, and i live in a van down by the river.
Can I remove my coat? Please, let me do this gentlemanly thing for you. I insist. Ohh, wow. Wow. Wowwee zow wow wow! Forgive me, I was admiring your bosom. Come let me get you champagne.
and your final jeopardy category is?
food
any food will do... just write it down...
so, burt reynolds
turd fergeson...
ok... turd fergeson
haha... that's a funny name
no it isn't... look whatever. what did you write? Miso. well i'm sorry mr. reynolds as much as you tried to lose, miso is actually a russian soup. now let's see what you wagered... Horny. Miso Horny. I'm stupified. Let's move on to Sean Connery...
You dare mock me? The master of Darkness? The great evil one? You monkeys. I will rip open your monkey bellies and pull out your monkey bowels, and I will feast on your monkey innards.
If it were me big guy, I'd work on getting down eating grapes before I moved on to "monkey innards".
Did you my ears just mistake me, or did you monkies just refer to me as "big guy"? Me the master of darkness. Me the great hell beast. Me the creater of evil? Me the, the, the...