((I'll start by saying this isn't a hot pics thread but take the time to read before you leave and close the door behind you
))
I must have been a ?dweller? in another life.
I?ll warn you beforehand it?s rather lengthy but it is a chain of events and thoughts that have changed in my mind between then and now. This may belong in another forum and most will just pass by because of the label it tends to carry but for those who know me here you will enter and read and hopefully you will relate in some way to my story.
I just can?t help myself from thinking and rationalizing what has occurred which more often than not just gets me into trouble.
It?s funny what your perception is of yourself and then to see or hear someone else?s perception of you ? it?s a very strange feeling. It makes you more aware of your words and your actions.
Some of you have wondered what happened to cause this. Some of you have assumed that it happened outside the forum. But then you?d have made the wrong assumption. You must look deeper and read between the lines to truly see what happened between me and another.
But enough dwelling. On to my story. After some sharply toned words it became obvious that misunderstandings can be two handed. But what became obvious is that once the seeds are planted you can?t go back, no matter how hard you try to make things right, it seems to make things worse.
So I decided that maybe it be best for all those on this forum if I just disappeared off the canvas. Only then could things return to their happy go-lucky ways. I seem to bring too much thought into things I do or say around here but I?m digressing. Some of you say it?s just a forum ? get a life. Go away if you want, stay if you want.
So then I see that there are other people out there who may not be known to me but seem to know my posts and enjoy them. I understand they aren?t for everyone and that?s fine. I do sometimes take things personally when I put effort into a thread or a post and then another thread turns up with the exact same idea and takes off with many many posts and mine gets well ? a few. To me it sticks out like a sore thumb. It tells me that the name on the creation of the thread says a lot to people in this forum. Maybe I?m reading too much into it but I don?t think so. People tend to get branded in this place. That?s a sad thing.
These are my words of a day ago that helped give me perspective. I warn you I?m not a poet but this is what it looked like;
Well my friends
The time has come
This must reach an end
At this moment in time
As I lie face down on the cold cold ground
They give their all to you
But their all is too late
At this moment in time
The all that they give
Seems to slip through your fingers
I hope it will come again
This moment in time
This moment in time
Where I died inside
I wish I could satisfy myself
At this moment in time
I wish there could be joy
The way it?s meant to be
I wish I could go back
To that moment in time
When did it turn
When did it walk away
How can I let it win the fight
At this moment in time
A moment in time when I can live
A moment in time when I can laugh
A moment in time when I can be
I hope that day will be
Another moment in time
I felt I had to leave this place.
Someone sent this to me today
It all makes sense. Does it to you? Miss you guys. Now I shall bury the past.
Ciao
Peace out