OK, consider this: to be fair, you should make a list of
good things about your life too. And then focus on the good stuff.
I don't know how much this will apply to your situation: the way i am usually about the future is often totally insecure or nervous or too negative for my own good.
For example, i was very insecure about my current internship and the English class i'm taking now. I thought "how am i gonna do this both?" or "is my English good enough?", "is this gonna work?", "will i mess up and get fired at work?" etc... before it was even "am i ever gonna find a job?"
And you know what? Almost any big thing that was coming up in my life turned out way better than i expected.
Granted, some days are better than others at work, but it sure beats sitting around doing nothing at home. And it's better i make mistakes now than later at a serious career - and it's worth all the work to hear "you did this fast" or "nice work". One of the things i particularly like is also my Dad asked people around if there was a job available, i had job agencies helping me out, but i found the job advertisement on my own - you know, it felt good to know i can do it.
As for the class - it's really easier and WAY more fun than i ever thought it would be, and i can't wait for Wednesdays to go there. When we have a drink break, we even go to this bar together with the class teacher and i (of all people) chat in English with a native speaker. Never thought that would happen.
I guess what i'm trying to say the best things in life come when you least expect them (yes i thought the interview at the internship firm went good, but i didn't think they'd actually pick me), and a lot of things in life tend to be better than you initially thought. (at least with me they do)
Also, one of my favorite things in life is how people i know in real life never stop to surprise me with how well they think of me... you know? It feels really special to receive praise or compliments.
Plus never underestimate hope.