I can't decide whether the internets turned me into a social outcast or whether I already was one before I found the internets.
It's kind of a chicken and egg situation.
I witnessed an odd thing the other evening. Whilst driving home late, and a bit drunk i might add, i noticed a group of rowdy boys off in the bushes milling about near the freeway. They were trying to be discreet i suppose, but i noticed them even though i was clearly seeing double.
I'm trying to marry the correct words and phrases here, don't laugh though or you are guilty too. Or so i tell myself.
I passed by the pack of mischief when i heard the impact of something on the outside of my car. I hit the brakes and skidded off of the road into the ditch where my car would sit for a night or two until i was sober enought to call the wrecker.
Frightened, the boys ran off towards a church in the distance, but not without me chasing them like a raving lunatic. I used to be able to run as fast as these lads, but you always seem to run a bit faster when your ass is on the line and you haven't pissed yourself for 6 hours straight.
I gave up chase and headed back towards the wreck in the ditch, smoking a cigarette and drinking for the small tumbler in my pocket. On the pathway back towards the road i trampled through the bushes the boys had been using for cover. This is where i noticed a pile of fresh dead chickens the boys had been using for ammo to pelt unsuspecting motorists.
It dawned on me that back in my youthful days, before i turned to booze, girls, guns, & Jesus, i was once a rowdy boy myself running with a pack of dogs like these. The difference is, our gang would simply throw eggs at the passing cars. Not the mother of all eggs.