Kaikoura, Te Wai Pounamu, Aotearoa (Kia Kaha, Aroha to all) Superthread

[coolian2]

Nothing like a good dose of denial. I've been there.

Not on the same issues (I mean shit, we've all read this thread) but yeah denial can break a person. I don't know what it's like when it goes against the values you've had absolutely hammered into you, so that can only be worse.

 

[coolian2]

Well hell, I'm sitting in my room and I can feel the heat radiating through my lovely French door windows despite the curtain being closed.

I'd open the doors but I'm not going to be home most of the day so like.......whatever.

I guess morning sun avoidance is better than avoiding afternoon sun.

 

[Axver]

Nothing like a good dose of denial. I've been there.

Not on the same issues (I mean shit, we've all read this thread) but yeah denial can break a person. I don't know what it's like when it goes against the values you've had absolutely hammered into you, so that can only be worse.

Yeah, take your garden variety denial and mutate it, and you've got this dude. He grew up in a seriously nutty house. Not only did they have really fringe religious ideas even by the standards of evangelicals and fundamentalists, but his father was actually a total philanderer and his mother kept taking him back because, well, divorce just wasn't an option in their belief system. As a teenager I didn't have to avoid going over to his place - the atmosphere was so toxic he always came around to everybody else's anyway! The couple of times I went there it was the most uncomfortable thing. It's absolutely little wonder to me that he's messed up.

One thing I remember really strongly is just how passionately he argued for Harry Potter as Satanic. I encountered other fundies online who pushed that idea too, but oh boy was he wedded to it. And if I put on any "secular" music when he came over to my place (like, uh, U2), he would refuse to listen to it.

 

[the tourist]

I know some of you are the praying kind and some of you are not. To those who are, my wife and I could really use your prayers. For those of you who are not, my wife and I could really use your thoughts.

Our baby boy, who was due to be born in March, is gone. Daddy and Mommy love you very much.

I have never felt this level of grief before. Today is the worst day of my life. And it's not even close.

 

[coolian2]

I know some of you are the praying kind and some of you are not. To those who are, my wife and I could really use your prayers. For those of you who are not, my wife and I could really use your thoughts.

Our baby boy, who was due to be born in March, is gone. Daddy and Mommy love you very much.

I have never felt this level of grief before. Today is the worst day of my life. And it's not even close.

Oh my god.

I'm so sorry to hear this. I really am lost for words.

My thoughts are with you. I cannot comprehend what you must feel right now.

 

[Axver]

That's truly horrible to hear, Andrew

I hope you and your wife have good people around you. Take care.

 

[Vlad n U 2]

I'm sorry for your loss, Andrew. Please take care.

 

[coolian2]

Feeling a bit subdued tonight. I have been a lot of evenings lately but this one bears comment.

Oh well. At least on the outside I appear to be happy.

 

[Axver]

I'm tossing between doing work, because I have no life, or drinking wine.

And wait it's almost 9:30. How?!

 

[coolian2]

I'm tossing between doing work, because I have no life, or drinking wine.

And wait it's almost 9:30. How?!

I didn't actually notice it's nearly 11:30 on December 1. What the fuck?

Also wine. Always wine.

 

[coolian2]

On the point of appearing happy on the outside, basketball tomorrow night!

I really should just plonk down the money on a season ticket by now.

 

[Axver]

I didn't actually notice it's nearly 11:30 on December 1. What the fuck?

Also wine. Always wine.

WHERE HAS MY YEAR GONE.

And I don't need to be told a second time!

 

[coolian2]

WHERE HAS MY YEAR GONE.

And I don't need to be told a second time!

I presume you've gone with wine.

 

[Axver]

Wine, and also doing some work.

 

[Axver]

Books don't write themselves, unfortunately.

 

[coolian2]

I did find essays wrote themselves better after wine. And let's be fair, I did pass.

 

[Axver]

I'm trying for a bit more than the publishing equivalent of a "pass"!

 

[coolian2]

I'm trying for a bit more than the publishing equivalent of a "pass"!

True.

My best exam was when I'd given up on a paper and I'm sure I was still drunk. Needed a massive pass to get through it, and did so.

 

[Axver]

Haha, I remember one exam in high school where I literally didn't study. I sat down the night before, tried for about ten minutes, gave up, rang a friend, and told him there was no way I wasn't going to fail, laughed about it, and talked shit for the rest of the night.

I finished it half an hour early and got almost a perfect mark.

 

[coolian2]

Nice. I nearly said nice effort but that's a lie

 

[coolian2]

At the basketball. Fuck yeah this is almost as good as the Wellington Phoenix

 

[Kieran McConville]

the only subject i ever passed without understanding anything was high school advanced mathematics. it was a triumph of rote practice. oh well, there was also intro to accounting (or; so you want to learn to think like an accountant).

 

[Kieran McConville]

How do you know if an accountant is an extrovert? He looks at your shoes when he talks to you.

 

[Axver]

We got accounting dressed up with a fancy new name, "business principles".

How neoliberal.

 

[coolian2]

the only subject i ever passed without understanding anything was high school advanced mathematics. it was a triumph of rote practice. oh well, there was also intro to accounting (or; so you want to learn to think like an accountant).

I nearly passed Economics the final year of school.

Given I'd mentally checked out instantly it always made me smile as a banker.

 

[the tourist]

Well, the worst two days are over. Now the long process of mourning and grieving follows, and hopefully the heartache dulls. In all of this, I am thankful, though. My daughter is so joyful - infectiously so. She is too young to understand. She mostly just had a two-day adventure with Grandpa and Grandma. Also just the gigantic outpouring of love from a very wide net of family and friends.

Anyway, I don't have the heart to post more. I might go back into lurking for a good long while.

Everyone says 2016 can piss off. I didn't. Not until Wednesday at noon when I got the call that he was gone. For the record, he was almost six months along.

 

[Axver]

Really pleased to hear you've had some good support, mate. Look after yourself and post more whenever you feel like it. How old is your daughter now? It shouldn't be a surprise but it still feels kind of crazy looking back on this thread and realising some of its founding members are now married/have kids/have real jobs, etc.

 

[Axver]

On a frivolous note, I had been planning a quiet and sober evening in.

A wine delivery just arrived.

Plans = changed.

 

[Axver]

This shiraz is smooth, just so you all know.

 

[coolian2]

Whoever decided they couldn't be bothered with their joint and gave it to me has gone a hell of a dealer.