IO: Ashley's a 7.

[UberBeaver]

If not then this whole thread is a pack of lies. But it has been 10 months, so who knows?

It would be funny if I went up to the woman, whom I have never spoken to, and just out of the blue inquire as to Ashley's current size.

 

[elevated_u2_fan]

I find your belief system fascinating.

 

[UberBeaver]

Is that directed at me? If so: CoNJ, buddy. C to the O to the N to the J.


Or was that "overheard"? If so:

 

[elevated_u2_fan]

it was directed at you buddy!

 

[Count Marzipan]

Every now and then I actually pay attention to people around me, though sometimes I have no choice but to listen, and I find it amazing what people will let come out of their mouths........that sounds bad, but you know what I mean...right?

I find eye contact quite distressing. How long do you keep eye contact? Is that too long!!? Is that too thrifty?!! If I look at that cupboard in the corner of the room for too long will they think I'm a crazy person?

 

[UberBeaver]

I am not big on eye contact either. I usually look "younder" or down. Don't know why.



The voices are making me angry this day. I can't tune them out, they're all around.

 

[UberBeaver]

Maura Maura....that's like Bora Bora....Maura Muara...haha....I just thought of that.

 

[UberBeaver]

Aren't you a dream in denim.

 

[UberBeaver]

Coffee, tea or me. Hot pants and gogo boots.

 

[phillyfan26]

When did you get your diamond watch fixed?

 

[UberBeaver]

I got to go drop off my junk.

As I live and breathe...
You missed the action yesterday. We came dressed as Rockettes.
Really?
Yeah, we had a ball?
Seriously....
Yeah.
Oh....oh my......oh.....come on.

 

[redhotswami]

are you still keeping track here? it must've changed by now. i don't even think she knows anymore.

 

[UberBeaver]

Dude, I married a Chinese girl!

 

[UberBeaver]

You're out like trout.



POWERJUICE!

 

[popacrobat]

will this juice make ashley a 2?

 

[UberBeaver]

Kevin, Kelly Ryan is anyone home? Kevin, Kelly, Ryan is anyone there to pick up? Kevin, Kelly, Ryan, you there? It's me? Anyone there to pick up? Kevin, Kelly, Ryan? Hello? Anyone there to pick up? Anyone there? Hello? OK.

 

[UberBeaver]

I know, I know....it's hard....my son, he like Macaroni Salad.

Yeah, yeah. Mine does too.

 

[phillyfan26]

I can relate. I have a son, too.

You know, if you believe in those DNA tests and all.

 

[UberBeaver]

You want whip cream?......I'll go get the whip cream, let me get the whip cream......DON'T BE SCARED OF THE WHIP CREAM.....you want whip cream? You gotta have whip cream....mmm mmmm mmmmmm......whip cream?......You want whip cream? I got whip cream. Mmmm.

 

[phillyfan26]

I'll have whip cream.

 

[UberBeaver]

No dairy. It's not good for your ear.

 

[bono_212]

I still say I'm not a 7

 

[UberBeaver]

Like they say on TV, "You can't make these things up."

Is it only on TV they say that? STFU you ignorant cow. I grow enraged.

 

[snowbunny00774]

"What is this XXX company they keep referring to that is launching in the States? Do they even have anything to do with us? Are they allowed to use that name? It's been on the TV and Regis & Kelly and everything, I wonder what that's all about?"


I want to take every reference that has been made over many months and communicated via email and intranet and ball them up on bits of paper and shove them in your eye sockets. Encourage you to read a little bit, you know?

Do we need Regis & Kelly to come in and explain every fucking thing about the place for you to get it? Is that the piece we've been missing? Why didn't you just say so...


I take your enraged Beav and raise it times a blood clot about to come flying out my throbbing right temple.

 

[UberBeaver]

Oh man. I have BEEN there.

 

[phillyfan26]

Who did Ashley vote for?

 

[UberBeaver]

Puerto Rrrrrrrrico!

 

[LMP]

I smile every time I see this thread bumped.

Ashley voted for Seven Costanza.

 

[UberBeaver]

Are you talking about wang?

 

[elevated_u2_fan]

Beav, you have the best co-workers ever...