Adam: *sighs as he unlocks the door and enters his hotel room*
Adam: *mutters to self* Another night of watching women fawn all over Bono, Edge, and Larry...does nobody love me?
Adam: *opens door and turns on light...much to his surprise, an orange and white cat is laying on his bed*
Cat: Hello, Adam. Please allow me to introduce myself...my name is Thomas Jefferson.
Adam: Oh...Bonochick's gay British cat?
TJ: Please...I'm only half British...she's got it all wrong...
Adam: Sorry.
TJ: So...I hear you are pretty lonely...I thought you could use some company...
Adam: *steps back* Whoa...when I mentioned wanting pussy, I didn't mean-
TJ: *gasps* You pervert! *slaps Adam with tail* I was just talking about hanging out...
Adam: *blushes* Ohhhhh...
TJ: *shifts eyes* I have an idea...if you're up to it...
Adam: What did you have in mind?
TJ: There's a spoon shop down the street and-
Adam: Whooooa, Thomas Jefferson....whooooa...you know I gave up drinking, smoking, and spoons...they were killing me...
TJ: You know you want them...you burn for spoons...
Adam: Please, TJ...this is too much...I can't handle it...
TJ: Oh yeah...well...what do you say to...THIS?!?!? *whips out gigantic spoon from under the bedspread*
Adam: *falls to the floor* Nooooooooo!!!!!!!!! Thomas Jefferson, you are an evil, evil gay British cat!
TJ: I'm only HALF British!!!!! Dammit!!!!! Look into my spoon, weakling!!!!
Adam: I mustn't...oh..but it's so...powerful...
Bono: *enters room* Adam, you forgot your- *sees Thomas Jefferson with spoon*
Bono: Don't worry, Adam! I'll save you!
TJ: It's far too late...BONER...
Bono: Oh, that does it! You're goin' down, you gay, half British cat!!!!!
*Bono wrestles with TJ while Adam rigs up a catapult with the giant spoon*
*Bono gets TJ into the spoon, and Adam flings TJ out of the window*
Adam: Oh, Bono! If you hadn't come, I don't know what I would have done...thank you...
Bono: Don't thank me...thank that giant spoon! Ya know, Adam...maybe spoons aren't so bad for you after all...come on...I hear there's a spoon shop down the street...
*Bono & Adam leave the room*
Adam: I wonder where TJ landed...
*Bono & Adam leave the hotel and see Larry flailing wildly on the sidewalk*
Larry: FECK, FECK!!!!! A feckin' cat fell in my cleavage!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bono & Adam: BWAAAAAHAAAAAHAAAAA!!!!!!!
~The End~
------------------
"Hallelujah, Heaven's white rose,
The doors you open...I just can't close..."
Adam: *mutters to self* Another night of watching women fawn all over Bono, Edge, and Larry...does nobody love me?
Adam: *opens door and turns on light...much to his surprise, an orange and white cat is laying on his bed*
Cat: Hello, Adam. Please allow me to introduce myself...my name is Thomas Jefferson.
Adam: Oh...Bonochick's gay British cat?
TJ: Please...I'm only half British...she's got it all wrong...
Adam: Sorry.
TJ: So...I hear you are pretty lonely...I thought you could use some company...
Adam: *steps back* Whoa...when I mentioned wanting pussy, I didn't mean-
TJ: *gasps* You pervert! *slaps Adam with tail* I was just talking about hanging out...
Adam: *blushes* Ohhhhh...
TJ: *shifts eyes* I have an idea...if you're up to it...
Adam: What did you have in mind?
TJ: There's a spoon shop down the street and-
Adam: Whooooa, Thomas Jefferson....whooooa...you know I gave up drinking, smoking, and spoons...they were killing me...
TJ: You know you want them...you burn for spoons...
Adam: Please, TJ...this is too much...I can't handle it...
TJ: Oh yeah...well...what do you say to...THIS?!?!? *whips out gigantic spoon from under the bedspread*
Adam: *falls to the floor* Nooooooooo!!!!!!!!! Thomas Jefferson, you are an evil, evil gay British cat!
TJ: I'm only HALF British!!!!! Dammit!!!!! Look into my spoon, weakling!!!!
Adam: I mustn't...oh..but it's so...powerful...
Bono: *enters room* Adam, you forgot your- *sees Thomas Jefferson with spoon*
Bono: Don't worry, Adam! I'll save you!
TJ: It's far too late...BONER...
Bono: Oh, that does it! You're goin' down, you gay, half British cat!!!!!
*Bono wrestles with TJ while Adam rigs up a catapult with the giant spoon*
*Bono gets TJ into the spoon, and Adam flings TJ out of the window*
Adam: Oh, Bono! If you hadn't come, I don't know what I would have done...thank you...
Bono: Don't thank me...thank that giant spoon! Ya know, Adam...maybe spoons aren't so bad for you after all...come on...I hear there's a spoon shop down the street...
*Bono & Adam leave the room*
Adam: I wonder where TJ landed...
*Bono & Adam leave the hotel and see Larry flailing wildly on the sidewalk*
Larry: FECK, FECK!!!!! A feckin' cat fell in my cleavage!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bono & Adam: BWAAAAAHAAAAAHAAAAA!!!!!!!
~The End~
------------------
"Hallelujah, Heaven's white rose,
The doors you open...I just can't close..."