Favourite Simpsons quotes.

[Edgette]

*Ralph being thrown through the Simpson's front window* - "I'm a brick!"

 

[Edgette]

"Oh no! Not Lenny!"

 

[Edgette]

"I was saying Boo-Urns." - Moleman

"Who shot who in the what now?" - Moleman

 

[Edgette]

"Awww that's Lenny? I wanted the black one!" - Homer

"Ah, my eye! My doctor said I wasn't supposed to get pudding in it." - Lenny

"Late night swimming and alcohol: it's a winning combination!" - Lenny

Ralph after being "cured" by Bart - "There's my lunch money. And there's my milk."

 

[FlyYourKite]

These are great.

Apu:

"Ah. The searing kiss of hot lead; how I missed you. I mean, I think I'm dying."

 

[daygloeyes2]

*Homer auditioning for the role of Mr. Burns*

Exactly.....D'oh!

 

[Irishteen]

Too many to pick from but

"Who are you"
"Potato man"
"Where the bloody hell have you been"

"Not this again, lets go to Moe's for a pint"
"Can I come?"
"No"
"W*nkers"

"I got a Springfield spoon for my spoon collection"

That episode is great, U2 and the Simpsons forever.

 

[U2Kitten]

"Do you find something comical about my appearance while I'm operating my automobile? Don't you know everyone needs to drive, even the very tall? This is the largest automobile that I could afford"

*pulls down 'haha' boy's pants and makes him walk down the road*

"Look, it's the boy who laughs at everyone!"

Crowd: "HA, HA! HA, HA!"

(I just love it when bullies get what they deserve!)

 

[TheRooster]

Trying is the first step towards failure.

 

[Dr_Macphisto]

HOMER: Marge, how could you? How could you dessert your children?
BART & LISA: Have a blast ma! Rock the casbah!
HOMER: Man's best friend indeed...

SEA CAPT: Yar, everyone likes a gumball machine, so why not a gumbo machine? >scalds hands on gumbo< Ow! Yar, does your school nurse treat burns?
SKINNER: nope!

HOMER: Mmm... beer...football...boobies.

 

[randhail]

Marge: Homer, the plant called. They said if you don't come in today, don't bother coming in on Monday either.

Homer: Woohoo!!! Four day weekend!!!

 

[miss becky]

Homer: Wow, a baby and a free burger. Could this be the best day of my life?

 

[shrmn8rpoptart]

i bent my wookie

 

[VertigoGal]

Homer (looking around at beautiful tropical island in South Pacific): "I'm gonna turn this place into a PARADISE!
(next scene shows tons of casinos, etc)

Missionary: Your father is doing missionary work in the South Pacific
Bart: Dad's dead, isnt he.

Sean: "well i was just pickin me teeth outta the gutter..."
"and then he turned back into the lamppost"

those might be paraphrased, wish i could remember more

 

[AquariumDrinker]

Homer (when he awakens to the smell of a meal the automated house voiced by Pierce Bronsan prepares in an attempt to kill him): "Mmm....Unexplained Bacon"

Another Homer one (directed to the Smashing Pumpkins): "Thanks to your gloomy music, my kids no longer dream of a future I cannot provide"

 

[VertigoGal]

^^^haha, love the smashing pumpkins one!

Ralph: That's my swingset, and that's my sandbox. I'm not allowed to go in the deep end. And this is where I met the leprechaun.
Bart: Right, the leprechaun.
Ralph: He told me to burn things

this one might only be funny to me cos for weeks afterward my little brother went around saying "a leprechaun told me to burn things!"

 

[D'oh!]

HELOOOOO ST. LOUIS!

umm.... thats SPRINGFIELD Steven!

 

[D'oh!]

Buzz Aldrin: second comes right after first!

 

[D'oh!]

Dear Baby! welcome to dumpsville...... population: You

 

[D'oh!]

And now....the moment that you've all been waiting for.... like the salivating dogs that you are..

 

[cobl04]

Homer - "Come on kids, lets go home."
Lisa - "Dad, we are home."
Homer - "That was fast."

Boss of Kwik-E-Mart - "You may ask me three questions."
Apu - "That's great because I only need to ask one--"
Homer - "Are you really the head of the Kwik-E-Mart?"
Boss - "Yes."
Homer - "Really?"
Boss - "Yes."
Homer - "Really?"
Boss - "Yes. Thank you come again."
Apu - "But I need to--"
Head - "Thank you come again."

Radio guy to Lisa when she wants radio to play Bleeding Gums Murphy record - "Just take a look at our morning guy."
Hans Moleman - "Welcome to Mornings with Moleman. Part 8 of the pain in which I live in everyday..."

Relocation guy - "You're new name is Mr. Thompson. So lets practice. I say hello Mr. Thompson you say hello back. Hello Mr. Thompson." (No response)
CUTS TO NEXT SCENE
Relocation guy - "Now when I stand on your foot and so hello Mr. thompson, you just smile and nod. Hello mr. thompson."
Homer - "I think hes talking to you."

 

[Sparkysgrrrl]

I yell this at work often-

"Help me Jeebus! Help me!"

 

[U2girl]

"Smithers, release the hounds."

 

[cobl04]

Inspired by the one above me -

Homer (to burns) - "oh, so what are you gonna do? release the hounds? releases the hounds that have bees in their mouths and when they bark they shoot bees at you? well go ahead. do your worst."

 

[OnFire]

Release the hounds could be a whole separate thread.

Burns- "whats with Crippler?"

Smithers- "well he's getting on sir, he's been with us since the 60's."

Burns- "Ah yes, I'll never forget the day he bagged his first hippie. That young man wasn't feeling very grooooovy."

 

[pepokiss]

"mmm... forbiden donut"

 

[D'oh!]

(Burns stomping all over miniature springfield)

take that..... take that kwik e mart....... take that stupid bar...... take that power plant!........ oh fiddlesticks!

 

[miss becky]

Homer: That little Timmy is a real hero
Lisa: What makes him a hero, Dad?
Homer: Well he fell down the well and....can't get out.
Lisa: How does that make him a hero?
Homer: Well, it's more than you ever did!

 

[D'oh!]

The Simpsons are going to Bart's idea!

 

[D'oh!]

I call the big one bitey!