This is the more cowbell skit for those of you that have not seen it on SNL - only this would be the U2 vertigo version - names of band members, producer and song have been change -that's it
Steve Lillywhite: Alright, guys, I think we're ready to lay this first track down. By the way, my name is Steve Lillywhite. Yes, the Steve Lillywhite. And I gotta tell you: fellas.. you have got what appears to be a dynamite sound!
Adam Clayton: Coming from you, Steve, that means a lot.
Larry Mullen: Yeah. I mean, you're Steve Lillywhite!
The Edge: It's incredible!
Bono: I can't believe Steve Lillywhite digs our sound!
Steve Lillywhite: Easy, guys.. I put my pants on just like the rest of you - one leg at a time. Except, once my pants are on, I make gold records. [ the group laughs ] Alright, here we go. "Vertigo" - take one. [ exits into the control booth ]
[ the group begins the song. Larry slaps the drums, Edge jams his guitar, Adam on bass, and Bono sings “yeah, yeah, yeah”
Edge: [ distracted by Bono’s “yeah, yeah, yeah’s” ] Okay! Wait! Wait! [ the group cuts off their instruments ] Steve, could you come in here for a minute, please?
Steve Lillywhite: [ stepping out of the booth ] That was gonna be a great track. Guys, what's the deal?
The Edge: Are you sure that was sounding okay?
Steve Lillywhite: I'll be honest.. fellas, it was sounding great. But.. I could've used a little more “yeah, yeah, yeah’s“. So.. let's take it again.. and, Bono.
Bono: Yeah?
Steve Lillywhite: Really explore the studio space this time. I mean, really.. explore the space. I like what I'm hearing.
[ the group starts the song again, as Bono sings “yeah, yeah, yeah “while dancing crazily. In the booth, Before the session is interrupted, Bono misses a “yeah”
The Edge: Okay, wait! Stop! I'm sorry. Steve, could you come back in here, please?
Steve Lillywhite: [ stepping out of the booth ] Fellas.. now, we just wasted two good tracks! That last one was even better than the first!
The Edge: Well, it's just that I find Bono’s “yeah yeah yeah” distracting! If I'm the only one, I'll shut up.
Adam: It was pretty rough..
Bono: You know, I could pull back a little. If you'd like.
Steve Lillywhite: Not too much, though! Fellas, I'm telling you - you're gonna want those yeah, yeah yeah’s on the track!
Bono : You know what? It's fine. Let's just do this thing.
[ the band starts the song once more, with Bono screaming “yeah, yeah, yeah” right next to Edge’s ear until Edge pushes him, causing Adam to fall ]
The Edge: [ stopping the song again, fighting Bono] Come on, people!
Steve Lillywhite: [ running out of the booth again ] That.. that doesn't work for me. I gotta have more “yeah yeah yeah“!
Larry : [ grabs Bono's shirt ] Don't blow this for us, Bono!
Adam: Yeah, quit being so selfish, Bono!
Bono: Can I just say one thing?
Steve Lillywhite: Say it, baby. Say it.
Bono: I'm standing here, staring at Steve Lillywhite!
Steve Lillywhite: The cock of the walk, baby!
Bono: And if Steve Lillywhite wants more “yeah!”, we should probably give him more “yeah“!
Steve Lillywhite: Say it, baby!
Bono: And, Larry, you are right - I am being selfish. But the last time I checked, we don't have a whole lot of songs that feature “yeah, yeah, yeah” .
Steve Lillywhite: I gotta have more “ yeah, yeah yeah!”, baby!
Bono: ..and I'll be doing myself a disservice -- and every member in this band, if I don't perform the hell out of this.
Steve Lillywhite: Guess what? I got a fever! And the only prescription.. is more “Yeah Yeah Yeah!!”
Bono: Thanks, Steve. But I think, maybe if I just leave.. and, maybe I'll come back later, and we can lay down the “yeah, yeah, yeah’s!”. [ starts to leave the studio ]
Steve Lillywhite: Aw, baby..
The Edge: Bono, wait! Why don't you lay down those “yeah, yeah, yeah’s” right now. With us. Together.
[ everyone agrees ]
Bono: Do you mean that, Edge?
Adam: He speaks for all of us.
Bono: Thank you.
Steve Lillywhite: Babies.. before we're done here.. y'all be wearing gold-plated diapers.
Larry: [ confused ] What does that mean?
Steve Lillywhite: Never question Steve Lillywhite! Roll it! [ exits back to booth ]
Bono: [ ready to lay the complete track down ] 1, 2, 3, 14.