There's this girl...

[Tuvok]

OK.

I'm at university and there's this girl in my tutor group who I'm absolutely crazy about. The only problem is that I have a crippling shyness around girls and have only been able to talk to her properly a few times in the last couple of months. The problem is that she's always surrounded by her mates and I just dont have the guts to go over and speak to her. But the few times we have spoken, I reckon we've hit it off pretty well and have a good laugh. Unfortunately its almost always been work related and I don't know much about her. She's also a few years older than me, which makes me feel even less confident.

Anyway, Christmas is coming up and that means I won't be seeing her for a few weeks, but afterwards we'll be in different tutor groups! All I know is that I have to do something before then or else I will feel absolutely terrible.

This whole episode has left me feeling miserable all semester and any advice would be really appreciated!!

 

[gareth brown]

Have you thought about talking to some of her friends or getting her number/email address next time you get the chance to talk to her?
I'll come back to this thread later as I need to leave my house right now but I know what you're going through! very much so, best of luck.

 

[Lancemc]

Well, I used to be very shy in high school, but luckily I've opened up in college. I know it can be difficult, but the only thing to do is to build up your confidence and just go for it one day. Try to catch her at a time she's not with a bunch of friends, even if it's just walking to class of something. Say you'd like to take her out to dinner or something. Pick a week, and have her suggest a night she'd like to go. If you think there's even a little chemistry between the two of you, there's a good chance she'll at least go for dinner one night if nothing else. But maybe not. Who knows. You've gotta go for it though. There's nothing to lose, and everything to gain.

I wish you the best of luck.

 

[clarityat3am]

I can relate to the asking out shyness. My whopper of a line from last week was, so you wanna go out sometime? haha! There's probably no easy way to get her away from everyone else outside of just asking her if you can talk to her. Her friends will probably get the hint if you do that. Good luck!

 

[tpsreports2424]

Just go for it! There's nothing to lose!

 

[phillyfan26]

I relate, I have some girls that I talk to normally cause I'm not interested, but the girl I like I can't talk to at all. It's tough.

College is college, though. Nothing to lose.

 

[redhotswami]

Aw that is so sweet! I tell ya though, I'm past college, and I *still* have a hard time talking to guys I'm interested in. Forget the butterflies, I've got pterodactyls.

Hmm, I guess I didn't offer any advice. But at least I did affirm your shyness! Some of us never grow out of it that's okay though, that doesn't mean it isn't possible!

 

[A_Wanderer]

DS9 6x20 - how do you get to Carnegie hall?

think about it

 

[Canadiens1131]

Ask her to coffee. Coffee is the best excuse to do anything.

Hi, my name's Mike, do you like coffee?
Hi, want to grab a coffee after class?
Hey, boring class huh? Want to grab a coffee?

The power of the bean™

 

[belbird]

yeah, coffee. and ask her in a way that she can say no if she wants, not in a way that she feels obliged to say yes. errr that sounds weird, i don't know how to say it, but yeah..

 

[all_i_want]

if you have a break between classes, just tell her that you'll get some coffee and ask if she wants some as well. take a walk to the canteen (if there is one) and chat her up on the way. also, next time you go to class go a bit late so you can sit close to her. that'll allow you to make casual remarks about the lecturer, which is always a neutral and stimulating subject (like the weather?!) in any case, good luck!

 

[Got Philk?]

Coffee is brilliant! Start with a small/non-threatening/perhaps even confusing thing. Like coffee! From there...just feel the flow my man.

 

[Canadiens1131]

Coffee is brilliant! Start with a small/non-threatening/perhaps even confusing thing.

"Hi, I'd like to enter you. First, however, we might enjoy a caffeinated beverage!"

 

[tpsreports2424]

^


What if she doesn't like coffee?

 

[bono_man2002]

"Hi, I'd like to enter you. First, however, we might enjoy a caffeinated beverage!"

 

[gareth brown]

Tuvok, UPDATE PLEASE!!

 

[phillyfan26]

"Hi, I'd like to enter you. First, however, we might enjoy a caffeinated beverage!"

"I want you."

 

[carrieluvv]

I wonder if he played it smart and ordered a piece of apple pie with a slice of cheese melted on top.:mohawksmiley:

 

[Tuvok]

OK yeah. I've decided to bite the bullet and ask her next time I see her. I've begun preparing my comedy monologue to save face when she says no!

 

[pepokiss]

ajahahahahah


I know the thought of a No for an answer is really hard, but the plan here should be talking to her so when you're not in the same class, you can still talk to each other and have more to talk than class...


if she doesn't like coffee, you have 2 choices:
1 - "then some tea"
2 - "then let's go catching pink butterflies" or something weird... weird enough to make her laugh and not run for her life


you make her laugh and you have made progress...

if she says no, .. I don't know... you can go all for it and ask her out... you even can teake her out for coffee :win:




I have a nothing to lose story that can help you (it didin't for me, but )

I was on the bus going home... in the right side, next to the window.. and in the other side, the same line but with the ahll in the middle, a girl... really cute, great blue-ish eyes, kinda rock and roll.. with a chain, long hair and black t shirt and skirt...

a guy ws gonna sit right in front of her, but he looked at the seat and didn't... then another dude did the same... and we both kinda looked on the seat to see what the hell was there.. and really was nothing.. then we looked at each other and laughed...

the rest of the trip I was looking at her and maybe she to me too...

so when I was going to step down of the bus, I wrote a note and taped it to the seat next to her... the note said "rock-and-roll boy looks for a rock-and-roll girl to rock and roll" and my email...


nothing happened (or has), but I really felt ok after I did it... it's really crazy if you think bout it... some other person could've got the paper and spam the hell out of me or crap like that...

I really hope she just has a damaged PC or doesn't use Messenger that much... that I'd understand

 

[bgmckinney]

"Hi, I'd like to enter you. First, however, we might enjoy a caffeinated beverage!"

 

[girlhappy]

Shyness can stop from doing all the things you"d like to....

 

[fly so high!]

OK yeah. I've decided to bite the bullet and ask her next time I see her. I've begun preparing my comedy monologue to save face when she says no!

Good on you!

Remember Nice guys finish last......so don't take too long.

 

[Tuvok]

They do indeed. I saw her get off with at least 2 guys at a party last night

 

[dazzlingamy]

t does mean anything, shes just having some fun!!

Talk to her!

 

[fly so high!]

They do indeed. I saw her get off with at least 2 guys at a party last night

Before i start going on a rampage of......WHAT A LITTLE SKANK AND FORGET ABOUT HER!!!! tirade.....what do you mean by "get off"? As i would take it that she was pashing and throwing her limbs in a fashion that prolly should be kept to the confines of a bedroom.

 

[Tuvok]

Sort of kissing and heavy flirting.

I'm such an idiot. I can't believe I began to convince myself I actually had a chance. I guess I assumed that because she was quiet in class she wouldn't be an animal on a night out.

 

[tpsreports2424]

You should of gone on the move wayyy before this happend..

 

[fly so high!]

^ You do have a chance......but do you want to know her now.......first impressions last,but on the other hand they are not necessarily accurate. The ball in is your court now...take in mind there was prolly Alchomoholcol involved.......so..........buy her a few drinks next time

 

[tpsreports2424]

Just do it fast! That's all I can really give because we have been waiting for a few days and no move yet, just do it...its not brain surgery