Shuttlecock! Part XVI - Tours of the future hold the metal crustaceans

[phillyfan26]

I was speaking with NSW last night, and found out that he's not just seeing one show in Europe this summer....he's seeing 6. Chicago will be his 7th and 8th show of the tour.

Don't worry, I made sure he knows that all of us jealously hate him.

Did I not mention? Yeah, he's doing a lot in the summer because the fall is a tough time for him to follow them around due to work.

 

[corianderstem]

Oh, that makes sense. Good for him.

 

[Diemen]

I was speaking with NSW last night, and found out that he's not just seeing one show in Europe this summer....he's seeing 6. Chicago will be his 7th and 8th show of the tour.

Don't worry, I made sure he knows that all of us jealously hate him.

Tell that bastard he's buying all the beer for the douchebag seats.

 

[corianderstem]

No beer for me during the show ... I already have to pee all the time. Alcohol just makes it worse.

 

[martha]

Small bladdered girls unite!

 

[u2popmofo]

Speaking of which, why haven't you broken down and gotten tickets for Chicago yet, Martha?

 

[corianderstem]

Yes, that!

And also, what did you end up getting for LA?

 

[lazarus]

NSW=King of the Douchebags

 

[phillyfan26]

No beer for me during the show ... I already have to pee all the time. Alcohol just makes it worse.

Small bladdered girls unite!

It's called training. You just train yourself to hold it in longer. How do you do this? You decide not to piss when you have to piss. You piss later. And slowly, your bladder adjusts.

 

[corianderstem]

I'm 35. My bladder has not adjusted yet.

 

[joyfulgirl]

I'm 35. My bladder has not adjusted yet.

Honey, you just need to drink water with Celtic Sea Salt in it. It will hydrate you, nourish your body with vital nutrients, and keep you from having to pee. This is my concert secret. I will bring the salt. I never get on an airplane without it.

 

[martha]

And slowly, your bladder adjusts.

And then you get a bad-ass motherfucker of a UTI.

Honey, you just need to drink water with Celtic Sea Salt in it. It will hydrate you, nourish your body with vital nutrients, and keep you from having to pee. This is my concert secret. I will bring the salt. I never get on an airplane without it.

She speaks truth.

 

[corianderstem]

Ooh, color me intrigued! I look forward to tasting your magic elixir.

(well, that just sounded dirty.)

 

[martha]

Speaking of which, why haven't you broken down and gotten tickets for Chicago yet, Martha?

Not going to happen. I just can't take the time at that time of year.

Yes, that!

And also, what did you end up getting for LA?

We'll see on Monday. I have to do general sale. I refuse to pay Bono any more of my money than I need to. If I'm going to shell out 50 clams extra, I at least want a handjob.

 

[corianderstem]

We'll see on Monday. I have to do general sale. I refuse to pay Bono any more of my money than I need to. If I'm going to shell out 50 clams extra, I at least want a handjob.

You'd better specify from whom, or you might want to be careful what you wish for.

 

[Irvine511]

how do girls get handjobs?

 

[martha]

I was thinking of Bono. (I usually am.)

What were you thinking?

 

[martha]

how do girls get handjobs?

Dude, trust me.

 

[corianderstem]

I was thinking of Bono. (I usually am.)

What were you thinking?

Well hey, I just didn't want it to end up being the guy sitting next to you in section 330, row QQ, seat 15.

Just lookin' out for ya, babe.

 

[martha]

Well hey, I just didn't want it to end up being the guy sitting next to you in section 330, row QQ, seat 15.

Just lookin' out for ya, babe.

Sister-friend!

 

[martha]

Alright, the queen of squaresville is going to bed.

 

[corianderstem]

G'night, awesome lady.

 

[Irvine511]

I was thinking of Bono. (I usually am.)

What were you thinking?

i thought you wanted Bono to give you a handjob if you had to pay ... nevermind.



this reminds me of this:


YouTube - Rushmore Handjob Montage

 

[lazarus]

I'm 35. My bladder has not adjusted yet.

You'll probably wind up skipping the adjustment and going straight to incontinence.

 

[corianderstem]

Oh, get out of here with your shiny bladder of steel.

 

[martha]

i thought you wanted Bono to give you a handjob if you had to pay ... nevermind.

This is exactly what I was thinking.

 

[mad1]

men prob pee 90 times in a day.

 

[elevated_u2_fan]

This got a legitimate "lol" out of me.

On a similar note, I think when most people write "lol", they're lying.

lol

I want to buy this, but I am holding out hope that I can someday walk into a store and find the Japanese version (with an extra track). I even ordered it from the local store...and got turned down a month later.

You have the tracks through other means though, right? What is the bonus track?

 

[Irvine511]

i'm all dirty and my clothes are torn, i resisted but they were too strong.

i bought two nice GA's for Charlottesville -- and then had to pay a Facility Charge, a Convenience Charge, and then some UPS Delivery bullshit because there was no email option, and then an order processing fee, all of which added up to the price of a second ticket.

i better get that handjob from Bono.

 

[lazarus]

I think the Cock Force needs some Viagra.

Shit is WEAK lately.

New thread, new life?