I had to babysit yesterday for my sister's 7 kids. (thank god I'm in-fertile) anyway, and well changing diapers is never really a pleasant experience, especially when the contents of the diaper come out green! and something else happened, well Jacob, he is the youngest one, was sleeping upstairs. and I was looking for a cigarette but I didn't want to turn on the light. So I felt my way through the room and finally found a pack of smokes on the dresser. . . . and I opened the top to get one out, 'cause I only wanted one. . . I'm trying to quit you know, . . I'm on the reduction plan. . .and it was really dark in the room, so I didn't see what was in there. . anyway what else could be in a cigarette pack besides cigarettes right? well . . welcome to my family. . so I stick my hand in the box and feel something slimey. . my eyes are becomming accostumed to the darkness and I take another look and there is a used condom in there! #%$&!@!! you know what I mean? But for some reason I was happy. . . at least there won't be an 8th baby on the way soon. I have been giving those two rabbits condoms for years, I was wondering if they knew how to use them. I guess I found out the hard way, or the gross way.
but then when all the kids were asleep I got to thinking what the grossest thing that ever happened to me was?. . . and I guess it had to be this one time when my family and I were at a 'all you can eat chinnese buffet'. . . and I went to the bath room. . . and you know what chinnese can do to your stomach, and well I 'dropped all my kids in the pool' and unknowingly it must have clogged it and then someone else came in the bathroom. . . maybe you guys don't know the term 'courtesy flush' . . . thats a jail term, when you share a cell with someone, the toliet is right next to the bed. . and so you are supposed to flush the toliet a couple times as you are going and not let in accumulate (not that I have ever been to jail). . . so when the guy came in I decided to give a courtesy flush. . . and the water rose up and splashed my. . . uh my factory$#%@! again, so yes I have damaged goods!
If anyone has anything grosser (I know it is not a real word) they get a prize!!
but then when all the kids were asleep I got to thinking what the grossest thing that ever happened to me was?. . . and I guess it had to be this one time when my family and I were at a 'all you can eat chinnese buffet'. . . and I went to the bath room. . . and you know what chinnese can do to your stomach, and well I 'dropped all my kids in the pool' and unknowingly it must have clogged it and then someone else came in the bathroom. . . maybe you guys don't know the term 'courtesy flush' . . . thats a jail term, when you share a cell with someone, the toliet is right next to the bed. . and so you are supposed to flush the toliet a couple times as you are going and not let in accumulate (not that I have ever been to jail). . . so when the guy came in I decided to give a courtesy flush. . . and the water rose up and splashed my. . . uh my factory$#%@! again, so yes I have damaged goods!
If anyone has anything grosser (I know it is not a real word) they get a prize!!