It's Official: I Need Your Prayers Please....
..Or, more correctly, I need a miracle.
I don't like discussing my personal life or anything like that online, normally, but I just HAVE to dump this on y'all or I will explode. Normally I prefer FYM and the News areas but this is a unique situation for me.
We are a small family. (I live in Albany, NY). There's myself in my own place, my mom and stepfather and teenage sister in another 15 min away. (or they were. More on that in a minute.) Then there's my uncle, down in NYC area, and my grandmother who lives 4 hrs away from us, in the Syracuse/Finger Lakes area. And an aunt who Mom keeps trackof ocassionally.
Last winter, my grandmother had a stroke. This was on top of a cancer scare she successfully came through 5 yrs ago. She's 80 now and lives alone (my grandpa passed away 6 yrs ago). Her place is on the waterfront and she's really in the boonies..and her neighbors are gone most of the yr to FLA, etc. The cancer scare took most of her funds and investments, between the medical expenses and hiring a home health care aide to care for her for a year. (Even though her insurance was excellent, if you know anyone who's been through this--esp colon cancer where you have to spend a lot on, er, home health products after you get home--you know how much money is involved here.) So when the stroke hit, my Mom had to help out with expenses and she and my uncle had to work out a system where every 2 weeks one of them would come down to her house to stay with her. She absolutely refuses, for various reasons, to move to Albany to be with us, even though it would be more convenient for everybody.
The medical and houseold expenses situation got to be quite rough by last winter, so I had to pitch in to help Mom out. This left my finances quite strained for a while, so I had to be late with my rent for 3 months. Normally, my rental manager would be fine with this, (I've lived there 4 yrs and she's been nice), but in January new management took over the company running my apt building, and they imposed a tough new rent policy. Instead of the normal $60 fine for being late, you now had to pay 10$ a day for every day you were late. And she laid down the law to me about being late more than 3 times in a year. You can guess what she said.
So, last Feb-March, I was in a desperate situation. That was the time U2 tix went on sale, of course, and as nobody knew what the situation for the fall leg would be, I just HAD to get my tix then. Luckily I saved my Propaganda code and after explaining my situation to a friend, he used my code and bought me the tix I will (hopefully) be going to see them with next week. That, of course, wasn't my biggest problem though.
I was able, through the intervention of kind friends and people at work, etc, to get my financial situation under control. I also tolf my Mom that she had to work out a way to get money, I could not be there to help until I got on my feet. She and my stepfather did not, shall we say, have a good relationship. He was becoming alcoholic, coming home drunk at 1 AM, etc. Things got even more rocky when she announced that she would be taking an early retirement in June to be able to spend more time with grandma. My uncle was having problems with my cousin, his son, and was not in great financial shape as a result either.
Early in June, two weeks before the reitirement was due to go into effect, Mom went to Grandma's house for the 2 weeks like normal. When she came back, she found half the downstairs furniture gone in their house, and a note saying that he was moving out and getting a seperation. He had his own place now, and she was going to have to start paying her own bills. This, after a 20 yr marriage. He knew what the situation was and I can't figure out why he did this, esp as he was making LOADS of money and could esily afford to pay ALL the bills if he wanted to. The contrast bewtwen him and her oculd not be more striking. Well, Mom took him to court, and he had to pay part of her bills. But now he wants a formal divorce. Mom couldn't take all of this, she can't afford a lawyer (for example, a simple phone call to her lawyer costs $150--those of you with experience with lawyers know stuff like this) so she is getting rid of the house and moving to be with my grandma. What she is going to live on, I don't know, and it is going to disprupt my sister's life as well. But I can't support her, tht's for sure, there is just no way. So she has to leave. And this, when she was finally going to retire and be finacillay stable, if not secure!
These developments have come very recently, within the past month and half. In the meantime, I have had to again help her out with money, b/c my former "stepfather" wouldn't do a damned thing. This meant I had to resort to all sorts of ingenious schemes to come up with money just to keep myself afloat. Nomally, I am not rich, but I get by. I am ppor grad student (or currently "in between semester grad student" anyway, for this reason) It has not been easy, and now I am at the literal end of my rope.
I was late this month with my Sept rent....and the late fee killed me. I had to put off paying bills till the end of the month that normally HAd to be paid by the middle of the month, for this reason. And to top it all off, the lease on my apt expires on Oct 1. I noticed that unlike in past yrs, the rental manger did not give me a copy of my lease for renewal. I asked her why this was, and she told me that the manager has informed her that if I was not on time with my rent this month, I would be evicted. This was a week ago. There was nothing I could do.
IN the past 2 months, I have done everything possible to come up with money, just to scrape by, let alone pay rent. I thought that I would not have to be helping Mom out after August, but due to the divcorce situation, I had to, there was nothing I could do. What do you do when your Mom convulsively cries to you on the phone every night? When do you put your foot down? I had to, last week, and it was not a pleasant task. Esp when you know the former "man of the house" is rolling in dough. If they were just seperated, she could go to her lawyer and he would have to help. But he is seeking a divorce, and when that applies, he's not legally bound to do anything. Just the opposite.
So now, I am in a desperate situation. I have until Sunday to come up with my rent, or I am quite literally out on the street. Here are the things I CANNOT do to come up with the money:
1)I can't get a bank loan. I did that back in the spring, when my credit was good, and it helped a lot. But due to several late bills, my credit is not good enough anymore (I asked.) And the loan money is used up, and I now am paying it back.
2)I can't go to my employer for a cash advance. I did this in the spring, and normally, they don't even do cash advances..but my boss decided to give me one. However, they could only do it by taking hours away from my vacation time, since I have not worked enough hours this pay period to cover an increase. Moreover, the amount I need ($600) is too big.
3)I can't get an emergency credit line increase from my credit card. I already got an automatic increase in August, which I have used up.
4)I can't go to anyone in the family. My uncle, like I said, is broke. I asked him.
5) My 2 best friends, whom I would normally ask, both went into the hospital in the past 2 weeks, one with appendicitis, the other with a kidney stone. ( I am NOT making this up. Trust me.)
6)3 weeks ago, I went to the pastor at my church and he agreed to help me out with the money to cover the deficent sum from Sept rent. He had to get permission from the church's Board of directors, but before they gave me a dime, I had to get a phone character reference from my employer and the rental office had to fax over to them the amount I owed. They just don't hand over a check. So I am sure this fact is a key reason why they are deciding to evict me. They think it's stricly an income thing..or the b**** in the manager's office does.
7) I have checked other local charities and they only help with things like groceries.
8) I have tried to seel furniture, and have found no takers.
9) I have had to give up my car and get around my bus, (luckily I have a student ID which allows me to ride most buses here for free).
10) My school can't help out either. Not in a week. And anyway, like I said, I had to take a semester off.
I am currently looking for a part-time job to get me back to normal. And holiday hours go into effect at my job, so I will be making more money starting in the middle of Oct and will be able to catch up IF I get Oct's rent in on time. But I have until Sunday to get the money on her desk, or I am OUT.
I have checked around for another apt and discovered that I have just about the cheapest place in the city of Albany. I could not find another place like this if I had to move out. Moreover, I have not a penny in the bank and could not afford even a truck to move my things, and where could I move them to? I have nobody who can store my stuff, and can't afford a penny for storage. I'd have to get rid of all my worldy goods. I can't sell them to family either..they have no money.
I have no friends to move in with, and even if I do, how could I find another place if I did? I really would be without a thing and literally on the street. I don't even know where the local homeless shelters are.
This is so cruel, b/c if I just caught up with the Oct rent, I could easily get the Nov rent in..I would be caught up financially if this month was taken care of. But to have to lose this place, all my funrniture, and be out on the street, after all I have gone though, is too much. If it was possible to sell my U2 tickets and have that cover my rent, I would, but 1) they're only GA's and 2) after going through all I went though to get these tix, and seeing I'm about to be homeless anyway, I may as well celebrate. It seems the band are the only thing making life worth living right now. The shows I am going to are Boston Oct 4 and MSG next Friday. Luckily I bought the train ticket to Boston, but I don't know how I am getting to NYC. The tix are non-refundable, BTW. I asked.)
And all for $600. I don't know what to do, I am at the end of my rope. Thank you all for reading this..I don't know HOW I am going to go through work today. I have been told my people at work not to go asking for money either..I could get into trouble. I was told this back in the spring, as I had done just this, (I didn't know what cash advances were.)
So I guess I'm just sitting here, watching my life fall apart, and helpless to stop what happens to me. And it's so cruel, b/c it's all so trivial, compared to what is happening to tohers. But right now, I have a problem, I guess....
..Or, more correctly, I need a miracle.
I don't like discussing my personal life or anything like that online, normally, but I just HAVE to dump this on y'all or I will explode. Normally I prefer FYM and the News areas but this is a unique situation for me.
We are a small family. (I live in Albany, NY). There's myself in my own place, my mom and stepfather and teenage sister in another 15 min away. (or they were. More on that in a minute.) Then there's my uncle, down in NYC area, and my grandmother who lives 4 hrs away from us, in the Syracuse/Finger Lakes area. And an aunt who Mom keeps trackof ocassionally.
Last winter, my grandmother had a stroke. This was on top of a cancer scare she successfully came through 5 yrs ago. She's 80 now and lives alone (my grandpa passed away 6 yrs ago). Her place is on the waterfront and she's really in the boonies..and her neighbors are gone most of the yr to FLA, etc. The cancer scare took most of her funds and investments, between the medical expenses and hiring a home health care aide to care for her for a year. (Even though her insurance was excellent, if you know anyone who's been through this--esp colon cancer where you have to spend a lot on, er, home health products after you get home--you know how much money is involved here.) So when the stroke hit, my Mom had to help out with expenses and she and my uncle had to work out a system where every 2 weeks one of them would come down to her house to stay with her. She absolutely refuses, for various reasons, to move to Albany to be with us, even though it would be more convenient for everybody.
The medical and houseold expenses situation got to be quite rough by last winter, so I had to pitch in to help Mom out. This left my finances quite strained for a while, so I had to be late with my rent for 3 months. Normally, my rental manager would be fine with this, (I've lived there 4 yrs and she's been nice), but in January new management took over the company running my apt building, and they imposed a tough new rent policy. Instead of the normal $60 fine for being late, you now had to pay 10$ a day for every day you were late. And she laid down the law to me about being late more than 3 times in a year. You can guess what she said.
So, last Feb-March, I was in a desperate situation. That was the time U2 tix went on sale, of course, and as nobody knew what the situation for the fall leg would be, I just HAD to get my tix then. Luckily I saved my Propaganda code and after explaining my situation to a friend, he used my code and bought me the tix I will (hopefully) be going to see them with next week. That, of course, wasn't my biggest problem though.
I was able, through the intervention of kind friends and people at work, etc, to get my financial situation under control. I also tolf my Mom that she had to work out a way to get money, I could not be there to help until I got on my feet. She and my stepfather did not, shall we say, have a good relationship. He was becoming alcoholic, coming home drunk at 1 AM, etc. Things got even more rocky when she announced that she would be taking an early retirement in June to be able to spend more time with grandma. My uncle was having problems with my cousin, his son, and was not in great financial shape as a result either.
Early in June, two weeks before the reitirement was due to go into effect, Mom went to Grandma's house for the 2 weeks like normal. When she came back, she found half the downstairs furniture gone in their house, and a note saying that he was moving out and getting a seperation. He had his own place now, and she was going to have to start paying her own bills. This, after a 20 yr marriage. He knew what the situation was and I can't figure out why he did this, esp as he was making LOADS of money and could esily afford to pay ALL the bills if he wanted to. The contrast bewtwen him and her oculd not be more striking. Well, Mom took him to court, and he had to pay part of her bills. But now he wants a formal divorce. Mom couldn't take all of this, she can't afford a lawyer (for example, a simple phone call to her lawyer costs $150--those of you with experience with lawyers know stuff like this) so she is getting rid of the house and moving to be with my grandma. What she is going to live on, I don't know, and it is going to disprupt my sister's life as well. But I can't support her, tht's for sure, there is just no way. So she has to leave. And this, when she was finally going to retire and be finacillay stable, if not secure!
These developments have come very recently, within the past month and half. In the meantime, I have had to again help her out with money, b/c my former "stepfather" wouldn't do a damned thing. This meant I had to resort to all sorts of ingenious schemes to come up with money just to keep myself afloat. Nomally, I am not rich, but I get by. I am ppor grad student (or currently "in between semester grad student" anyway, for this reason) It has not been easy, and now I am at the literal end of my rope.
I was late this month with my Sept rent....and the late fee killed me. I had to put off paying bills till the end of the month that normally HAd to be paid by the middle of the month, for this reason. And to top it all off, the lease on my apt expires on Oct 1. I noticed that unlike in past yrs, the rental manger did not give me a copy of my lease for renewal. I asked her why this was, and she told me that the manager has informed her that if I was not on time with my rent this month, I would be evicted. This was a week ago. There was nothing I could do.
IN the past 2 months, I have done everything possible to come up with money, just to scrape by, let alone pay rent. I thought that I would not have to be helping Mom out after August, but due to the divcorce situation, I had to, there was nothing I could do. What do you do when your Mom convulsively cries to you on the phone every night? When do you put your foot down? I had to, last week, and it was not a pleasant task. Esp when you know the former "man of the house" is rolling in dough. If they were just seperated, she could go to her lawyer and he would have to help. But he is seeking a divorce, and when that applies, he's not legally bound to do anything. Just the opposite.
So now, I am in a desperate situation. I have until Sunday to come up with my rent, or I am quite literally out on the street. Here are the things I CANNOT do to come up with the money:
1)I can't get a bank loan. I did that back in the spring, when my credit was good, and it helped a lot. But due to several late bills, my credit is not good enough anymore (I asked.) And the loan money is used up, and I now am paying it back.
2)I can't go to my employer for a cash advance. I did this in the spring, and normally, they don't even do cash advances..but my boss decided to give me one. However, they could only do it by taking hours away from my vacation time, since I have not worked enough hours this pay period to cover an increase. Moreover, the amount I need ($600) is too big.
3)I can't get an emergency credit line increase from my credit card. I already got an automatic increase in August, which I have used up.
4)I can't go to anyone in the family. My uncle, like I said, is broke. I asked him.
5) My 2 best friends, whom I would normally ask, both went into the hospital in the past 2 weeks, one with appendicitis, the other with a kidney stone. ( I am NOT making this up. Trust me.)
6)3 weeks ago, I went to the pastor at my church and he agreed to help me out with the money to cover the deficent sum from Sept rent. He had to get permission from the church's Board of directors, but before they gave me a dime, I had to get a phone character reference from my employer and the rental office had to fax over to them the amount I owed. They just don't hand over a check. So I am sure this fact is a key reason why they are deciding to evict me. They think it's stricly an income thing..or the b**** in the manager's office does.
7) I have checked other local charities and they only help with things like groceries.
8) I have tried to seel furniture, and have found no takers.
9) I have had to give up my car and get around my bus, (luckily I have a student ID which allows me to ride most buses here for free).
10) My school can't help out either. Not in a week. And anyway, like I said, I had to take a semester off.
I am currently looking for a part-time job to get me back to normal. And holiday hours go into effect at my job, so I will be making more money starting in the middle of Oct and will be able to catch up IF I get Oct's rent in on time. But I have until Sunday to get the money on her desk, or I am OUT.
I have checked around for another apt and discovered that I have just about the cheapest place in the city of Albany. I could not find another place like this if I had to move out. Moreover, I have not a penny in the bank and could not afford even a truck to move my things, and where could I move them to? I have nobody who can store my stuff, and can't afford a penny for storage. I'd have to get rid of all my worldy goods. I can't sell them to family either..they have no money.
I have no friends to move in with, and even if I do, how could I find another place if I did? I really would be without a thing and literally on the street. I don't even know where the local homeless shelters are.
This is so cruel, b/c if I just caught up with the Oct rent, I could easily get the Nov rent in..I would be caught up financially if this month was taken care of. But to have to lose this place, all my funrniture, and be out on the street, after all I have gone though, is too much. If it was possible to sell my U2 tickets and have that cover my rent, I would, but 1) they're only GA's and 2) after going through all I went though to get these tix, and seeing I'm about to be homeless anyway, I may as well celebrate. It seems the band are the only thing making life worth living right now. The shows I am going to are Boston Oct 4 and MSG next Friday. Luckily I bought the train ticket to Boston, but I don't know how I am getting to NYC. The tix are non-refundable, BTW. I asked.)
And all for $600. I don't know what to do, I am at the end of my rope. Thank you all for reading this..I don't know HOW I am going to go through work today. I have been told my people at work not to go asking for money either..I could get into trouble. I was told this back in the spring, as I had done just this, (I didn't know what cash advances were.)
So I guess I'm just sitting here, watching my life fall apart, and helpless to stop what happens to me. And it's so cruel, b/c it's all so trivial, compared to what is happening to tohers. But right now, I have a problem, I guess....
