|03-10-2004, 09:16 AM||#1|
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: New Yorkf
Local Time: 07:36 AM
For the First Time I Feel Loved Part 15.....
Plans for Adam's birthday came along quite nicely as Bono and Sam tried to make this event successful without Adam knowing.The other guys would help occassionally, but they had to be the ones to keep Adam busy while Bono and Sam made the arrangements.Adam would often questions the guys on why their lead singer wouldnt show up or had to leave, but him knowing Bono, knew he was prolly busy working on something else. Sam thought that throwing Adam a perfect surprise party was hard, but trying to make the best decision that wouldnt leave a scar on both her and Adam was harder. This was killing Adam, not knowing whether she would say yes or no,he tried pretending that he was alright but he wasnt.What was he going to do if she had said no????How would he react to this situation?????How would it affect him?????He knew he couldnt lose her, but he also wanted her to be happy, he thought about all that on his way home, not sure if he could even be with her tonite.He entered his apartment, trying to make himself less miserable.Sam was already making dinner when she heard the door close:__________________
"Hey,"Adam said as he took his coat off.
Sam looked back at him :
"Hey," *they paused, looked at each other,then she continued placing the plates on the table*
"U made dinner I see,"*Adam said as he tried to kill the silence btw them*
"Yea I......ummmmmm thought I should fix something up as I knew u'd be hungry," *she tried to avoid lookin at him*
"Actually, *he ans back* I ....had something just before I came home, the guys had ordered a lot of food so as we worked ,we kinda pigged out,"
"Oh I see.......well it's just pasta anyways so it doesnt matter I'll freeze it *she finally looked at him*
Adam looked at her, trying not to make things more tense btw them:
"Listen I'm gonna go to bed,I'm really really tired,"
Sam looked at him knowing that things werent the same :
"Ur sleeping in the spare room again ,u mean?"
He looked at her,not wanting to ans her:
"Does it matter where I sleep, I better get use to sleeping alone again so I thought I should start now,"
Sam looked back at him surprised:
"What does that mean??? I knew that u werent gonna take my ans lightly, this is so unfair Adam,"
"What is???? huh Sam????? the fact that I want to spend the rest of my life with u, the fact that I've finally found happiness ,the fact that I wanna be as happy as my other mates r?????" *he looked at her angrily*
Sam walked closer to him:
"No.......u deserve those things ,what's unfair is the fact that ur upset with me because I havent told u yes ,the fact that u expect me to give up my whole life here to move to some place where I'm gonna be uncomfortable, ur asking me to leave my friends and my family and be a thousand mile away from them, seriously Adam.....I really don't understand u.....if I asked u to do that for me u wouldnt have, u would have talked about how ur career is important to u and ur friends and family ,well just as they r important to u, mine is important to me,"
Adam watched her, being upset ,he still didnt want to say the wrong things to her:
"Ur right.....but what about making sacrifices.......and ur the one who said......that we gotta both make sacrifices to be together,"
"So.....*she looked at him* I'm the one who is to make the bigger sacrifice here is that what ur saying, or r u saying because I work in a Star bucks café and my career isnt as big as urs that I'm not losing anything,"?
Adam looked at her:
"I didnt say that nor meant it, and u know I would never bring down what u do I know what ur plans r and I'm happy for u, but is wanting to be with the one person who've changed my life so wrong, is wanting to love u the way u love me and spoil u the way u spoil me so wrong?If it is....then I'm an ass for being in love again,"
"Sam u know what pisses me off more, is the fact that after I'm done recording I'm going back to an empty house ,I'm not gonna be able to see ur face ,or smell ur perfume or listen to u sing in the bathroom on mornings.I'm not gonna be able to come home at nite and smell ur cookin, or kiss u and say I love u, and what f****** pisses me off more is the thought of another man making love to u, when I'm the one who should be there in bed with u, that is the reason why I'm upset, not because u didnt ans me," *he looked at her and walked to his liquor cabinet*
Sam looked at him ,realizing that this is something that would really leave a deep hole in Adam's heart if the right thing isnt done:
"Adam....*she walked closer to him* all those things that u feel for me,I've never been felt like that with any other man, ur diff ....u want something more out of me besides the bedroom and that is what I love and admire about u,that is why I go crazy when I think of u walking away from me and going into that plane and never seeing u again, everything that u will feel I will feel, nothing changes *takes the glass of rum from him*I'm so scared, and sad thing is I have it built up inside me and no mattter how much I want to let it out I cant, because I want to cherish the times we have now with each other, I want us to be happy ...I want to focus on now , because whatever happens, I don't want to leave things the way u and Suzie did," *she looked at him*please understand that.Adam looked at her for a while ,then walked pass her:
"Then let's make things easier..........let's call it quits, that way u wouldnt have to make a life changing decision and there's no screaming or calling each other bad names ,so see u don't have to worry,"
Sam looked at him, wiping the tears from her eyes;
"So I don't wanna go with u and ur willing to give up on, us that's just like u Adam," *wipes the fresh tears than flows out of her eyes*
"What the F******* do u want me to do?? What???? have a long distance relationship????See u everytime ur on vacation?????Call u on the phone and pretend we're together face to face????If u think that's what's gonna make what we have survive then ur wrong baby, cause both of us will end up screwing some body else, so unless u can think of something else , I think we should just end things ,u go ur way and I'll go mine" *he yelled out*
Sam looked at him:
"If ur willing to give up on us that easily,then what we so call have btw us isnt real.Ur trying to make me feel guilty for u having to suffer again, but ur the one who's making this worse than it should be.If u say that u love me and want to be with me ,then long distance relationship shouldnt be a problem , but with u....it would be because I know once u get back to dublin u'll forget about me and go on ur woman race, so don't even try to pretend that u wouldnt forget or care.So go ahead ,sweetheart give up on us, if ur not gonna put an effort into this ,why the hell should I? I proved to u time and time again that I love u,I took care of u, I tried to be the best woman for u, and u cant see that." *she looked at him*
Adam gave a sacarstic laugh:
"See.... I knew that the bad seed was inside u, I knew sooner or later that I would finally get to see the real u, *he walked closer to her *as I said before .....I'm a real ass to fall back inlove , *he looked at her and went to get his coat and walked out*
Sam looked at him leave and just released everything that she held back.She sat on the couch and cried until she felt better again, then thought of the best person she could call to talk too....Bono.
Alright ladies.......it's get bad..... dont pelt any lemons at me......all romance stories have their ups and downs!!!!!!!Stick around to see what advise Bono gives Sam!
|03-10-2004, 05:23 PM||#3|
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Juiz de Fora,Brazil
Local Time: 09:36 AM
Poor Sam! I hope Bono helps her.
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