My Ex is Engaged...

[Catman]

For me, a 20 year old college student, this is a very strange feeling. She broke up with me roughly 6 months ago (she said she couldn't "handle a relationship" at the time, but a week later began seeing someone else) and is now engaged to this guy she apparently dumped me for. I JUST found this out, and apparently it happened pretty recently (as in sometime this month)...

I don't know - she's only 19 now, and to be honest, I am pretty much over her, but just knowing that she's engaged makes me feel as though I should be doing something "more" with my life. I haven't dated anyone since she left me, and here she is in this very adult relationship. Has anyone been in a similar situation? We don't talk to each other except when randomly bumping into one another on campus (and with LSU holding about 35000 students, it doesn't happen often). heh, she was even at the U2 concert I attended in Houston.

But that's besides the point - she's ENGAGED and I'm feeling very smalltime. What else should I be doing with my life at this point? I've been involved with a lot of oncampus activities, my grades are fine ('B' average)... I'm not working right now, though. Maybe I should find a job? Or get a girlfriend? Do you think that would help change my outlook on the situation?

Eh, I'm just really shocked at the whole thing. She's Mormon and I know they usually get married at an early age, but still... You know what? It feels like I finally had a glimpse of what people my age are really capable of, and I just feel left behind, struggling to keep up. Yeah.

I guess that's it then. It felt good getting it out into some medium or another. Chow...

 

[indra]

ummm....what you shouldn't be doing is thinking that because your ex feels ready to be engaged you should also. Some people are ready to settle down really early, but most people aren't. If it's shocked you, I'm guessing you are one of the latter.

You're 20 years old. Continue to get your education and get as many experiences as possible while you have few responsibilities. Then when, and if, you do settle down with someone you won't feel bitter that you missed out on doing what you wanted without having to consider someone else.

You are doing fine. Don't let someone else's yardstick define you.

 

[BrownEyedBoy]

I think she is very immature to just jump into something as serious as marriage in less than 6 months of commitment. It just doesn't make sense.

She's your ex-girlfriend now. Let go. ASAP.

Don't measure yourself to other people's actions at your age. Go at your own pace.

My advice is relax. Your opportunities will come in due time.

 

[Liesje]

I think she is very immature to just jump into something as serious as marriage in less than 6 months of commitment. It just doesn't make sense.

ditto. and she's only 19!

Consider this her loss.

 

[bonoishot]

Don't measure yourself to other people's actions at your age. Go at your own pace.

good advice

 

[For Honor]

Maybe I should find a job? Or get a girlfriend? Do you think that would help change my outlook on the situation?

Don't react.

Choose what you want to do.


There is nothing wrong with seeing what other people up to, but Idon't think that you should worry too much about this

 

[blueeyedgirl]

I think you should start making bets on how long her relationship will start, or not.

Seriously, don't judge your life on someone else's. Only you know how ready you are to be doing stuff.

 

[Chizip]

you're only 20, so dont worry about it.

now if you arent engaged by the time you are saaaaaaaaaaay, 22, then i would start to get worried.

 

[V Nura]

you're only 20, so dont worry about it.

now if you arent engaged by the time you are saaaaaaaaaaay, 22, then i would start to get worried.

hahaaha.

 

[girlhappy]

Consider yourself lucky.Because she will be probably divorced before her late 20s.
SHE is behind and you have the world of opportunities ahead!

 

[redkat]

You're in college. What more should you be doing with your life right now?

Study and enjoy your life!!

Way too young to be getting married in my opinion. you've got your whole life ahead of you and dating can be fun!

 

[MrBrau1]

odds are the wedding will never happen, or will end in divorce.

 

[BAW]

20 years old is pretty young to be worried about things like this...enjoy college life, date lots of girls or one exclusively if that's what you want but don't feel that you HAVE to be in a serious relationship because your ex is engaged. Nothing has passed you by, your life is just starting!


And yeah...what Mr. Brau said is probably true, unfortunatly.


*This bit of advice brought to you by someone who was married at 18 and divorced at 21