IO: Critical analyses here, pt. 2

[UberBeaver]

You get into the minus scores because you carry an air of one who wears pink collared shirts and drinks beer from a plastic cup. Nevermind.

1.) I do not own any pink shirts. I suppose I'm either A.) not secure in my manhood or B.) I just don't fucking like pink.

2.) I drink from a bottle unless it's Guinness, in which case I drink tap in a pint glass, or Chimay which means it's a special occasion and I want a ncie fucking glass. I don't drink any alcohol from plastic. Probably why I hated frats so much. And to be quite honest, I find your accusation offensive. And no one has ever offended me on this site before. You fight dirty, woman. I like it. Though I'd suggest you knock it off, lest I call an army of Barbies to invade your home. I'll fucking do it. I don't give a fuck. True story, Darl.

 

[No spoken words]

1.) I do not own any pink shirts. I suppose I'm either A.) not secure in my manhood or B.) I just don't fucking like pink.

2.) I drink from a bottle unless it's Guinness, in which case I drink tap in a pint glass, or Chimay which means it's a special occasion and I want a ncie fucking glass. I don't drink any alcohol from plastic. Probably why I hated frats so much. And to be quite honest, I find your accusation offensive. And no one has ever offended me on this site before. You fight dirty, woman. I like it. Though I'd suggest you knock it off, lest I call an army of Barbies to invade your home. I'll fucking do it. I don't give a fuck. True story, Darl.

This post starts off sort of lame, then slowly gets better, and then ends very very powerfully.

Beav, when you drink Powerjuice, what do you drink it out of? Lately, I've been drinking it out of an empty scuba diving oxygen tank.

 

[UberBeaver]

This post starts off sort of lame, then slowly gets better, and then ends very very powerfully.

Beav, when you drink Powerjuice, what do you drink it out of? Lately, I've been drinking it out of an empty scuba diving oxygen tank.

It's weird, its like I don't "drink" POWERJUICE, I find that POWERJUICE...and I feel stupid saying it, but it drinks me. You know what I mean? Like, I open a can, and ingest it, but right away I feel as if my being is being.....I dunno.....ingested BACK INTO THE FUCKING CAN. But then all is clear, and I reach for the Sword of Clarity, and then I just unleash the Ass Kicking of Awesome upon the universe. That make sense?

 

[No spoken words]

It does make sense. Too much sense.

My sword's name is Terminus Est, by the by. Stolen name, but I like it. Latin FTW.

 

[UberBeaver]

I hope that one day the Sword of Clarity and Terminus Est meet upon the field, as allies. not as foes. That would be ugly. Especially if Pfan showed up with the Sword of STFU and LemonMelon rolled in with GFY. We'd have to school those children, son. I would take no pleasure in that massacre.

 

[No spoken words]

I hope that one day the Sword of Clarity and Terminus Est meet upon the field, as allies. not as foes. That would be ugly. Especially if Pfan showed up with the Sword of STFU and LemonMelon rolled in with GFY. We'd have to school those children, son. I would take no pleasure in that massacre.

YLB has the Destiny Sword, so, he'd clean up whatever mess was left over.

But, then, likely, Elfa would materialize out of nowhere, with his Canadian Cutlass, forged deep in the heart of Edmonton, and kill us all.

 

[phillyfan26]

I still drink POWERJUICE the old fashioned way, right out of a fucking glass.

 

[LMP]

YLB has the Destiny Sword, so, he'd clean up whatever mess was left over.

But, then, likely, Elfa would materialize out of nowhere, with his Canadian Cutlass, forged deep in the heart of Edmonton, and kill us all.

I cut off my brother's mechanical hand with it, too, so you know it's good.

 

[Angela Harlem]

I still drink POWERJUICE the old fashioned way, right out of a fucking glass.

Beaver needs to do a poll on this, seriously. Do you:
A Hang over the bar and drink it straight from the tap?
B Pull a cart around with a keg of it in tow?
C Icy cold glass, down the hatch.
D With an I.V line. Screw the digestion process.
E Neat with a slice of lime
F Fuck all that - I do osmosis. The POWERJUICE comes to me.

 

[zonelistener]

(class) E.

 

[No spoken words]

I cut off my brother's mechanical hand with it, too, so you know it's good.

This is the kind of talk that I always approve of.

 

[coolian2]

I'd like a recount.

 

[No spoken words]

I'd like a recount.

Coolian

A dead man

-1.3/40

 

[coolian2]

That sounds very fucking ominous.

 

[The Sad Punk]

Beav drinks Chimay? Fuck yeah.

 

[UberBeaver]

Beav drinks Chimay? Fuck yeah.

Yeah - and check this: I have a bottle of the white label at home - and I'm psyched cause I've never had it - but it's bad, so I have to bring it back. It must have been on the shelf too long, cause there's stuff floating in it. Which sucks, but that's ok so long as I can replace it.

So far the red label is my favorite. It's brilliant. Blue was very good. Excited for white in a way only someone with a drinking problem can be.

 

[elevated_u2_fan]

Excited for white in a way only someone with a drinking problem can be.

 

[UberBeaver]

Is that a plastic cup? Yeah. I'd call that a problem.

 

[elevated_u2_fan]

Beav, if my Airplane joke was wasted on you, I will be displeased

 

[UberBeaver]

I love that movie?

 

[elevated_u2_fan]

you've never seen it, have you?

 

[No spoken words]

Beav, if my Airplane joke was wasted on you, I will be displeased

Looks like it was indeed wasted. I know you are disappointed, Elfa, but, there's always this:

Purging is at last at hand. Day of Doom is here. All that is evil, all their allies; your parents, your leaders, those who would call themselves your judges; those who have lied and corrupted the Earth, they shall all be cleansed.

 

[UberBeaver]

you've never seen it, have you?

Airplane? Dude, of course i've seen it. It's ok, I speak jive. But I took your joke, and I brought it TO THE NEXT LEVEL!

 

[elevated_u2_fan]

Looks like it was indeed wasted. I know you are disappointed, Elfa, but, there's always this:

Purging is at last at hand. Day of Doom is here. All that is evil, all their allies; your parents, your leaders, those who would call themselves your judges; those who have lied and corrupted the Earth, they shall all be cleansed.

I SHALL HAVE MY REVENGE!!!!

Airplane? Dude, of course i've seen it. It's ok, I speak jive. But I took your joke, and I brought it TO THE NEXT LEVEL!

 

[The Sad Punk]

Zucker brothers.

Yeah - and check this: I have a bottle of the white label at home - and I'm psyched cause I've never had it - but it's bad, so I have to bring it back. It must have been on the shelf too long, cause there's stuff floating in it. Which sucks, but that's ok so long as I can replace it.

So far the red label is my favorite. It's brilliant. Blue was very good. Excited for white in a way only someone with a drinking problem can be.

Yeah, the only times I've had white label it was out of date and I was just furious about that. But the blue and red ones are always nice.

I must be the only person I know who doesn't like Hoegaarden.

 

[UberBeaver]

I brought the white label back, but the guy said it was ok. Then he got a couple more bottles, and they were the same. So I'll give it a try.

I like Hoegaarden, but I rarely order it. There's usually other things I'd rather be drinking. But it's not bad - especially with the orange - that helps.

 

[Diemen]

See if you can find Trappiste Rochefort somewhere. That's some good fucking beer.

Or anything by Unibroue. Not to be confused with

 

[Angela Harlem]

bloodshot and uneven eye colour

 

[No spoken words]

Diemen, that dude looks like a Bizarro version of you.

 

[Angela Harlem]

So it isn't Diemen? Oops!