Anxiety

The friendliest place on the web for anyone that follows U2.
If you have answers, please help by responding to the unanswered posts.
See posts with no answers
When you say anxiety, do you mean where you have a physical reaction to your worrying? As in, shaking, cold sweat, shortness of breath?

I used to have this problem. When I was in college I had a bad case of anxiety. It was a terrible experience for me, one I hope to never have again ever.

These days, I'm still stress prone, but I don't have an anxiety disorder.

One way I began to tackle my anxiety was developing a mantra in my head, where I would say, "everything is going to be OK, everything is going to be all right". That would work enough to the point where I wasn't on a brink of breakdown. Of course, it was important that I trusted the fact that the world wasn't going to fall apart at any minute.

Hope that helps :)
 
Yes. It started to rear its ugly head for me about a year and a half ago, and is deeply unpleasant and extremely frustrating. I've been working through it via counselling, and am experimenting with other things as well to find what works for me (exercise and mental things, about to also have a consultation with a naturopath).

It's gotten somewhat worse, and while it hasn't been an easy journey trying to unravel the causes of it, but it's been enlightening and I am hoping that in the process I can also try and figure out some other general issues in my life.
 
More mental. Lack of confidence, always seeing negative or feeling like the negative is going to happen which creates stress.

Can't trust anyone. Can't ever be happy I can meet a great gal but find that I get the feeling I'm walking on egg shells and its only a matter of time before something bad happens.

I do counseling, I am extreme in my working out and nutrition (because I don't want to be out of shape), I'm not a big drinker, and Im not around those who do drugs.

My family is very negative so I've had to distance myself from them but its tough to completely avoid them.

I don't have a lot of friends because I don't feel comfortable around everyone. Takes a loooong time for me to trust and I'm a bit of a blunt person and I always joke around so takes a certain type of person to like my humor. Basically if you can handle Seth McFarland then we can get along.

But I just feel like no matter what I do, I have this feeling it won't be good enough. Ill be replaced at work, in a relationship or anything else.

Succcckkkkkksss
 
This is certainly something I struggle with. I'm a control freak and I have a fear of failure, so I've found my anxiety is at it's worst when I don't have control of a situation and/or I feel like I'm failing. Obviously those things are a part of life, so it's hard. Add in the occasional mild depression and things can go into meltdown mode quickly. I've had a few panic attacks in my life, and its really scary.

One of my biggest problems is social anxiety. I'm fine one-on-one with people, or if I'm in a group of people that I know really well. I'm also ok if it's a group with a purpose- there is something specific to talk about (I guess the best example is a support group, or maybe a book club that stays on-topic). But dump me into a neighborhood barbecue with people I only see once a year and I clam up. No idea what to say, feel stupid, etc.

I also don't have a lot of friends, which I'm ok with- I'd rather have a few good friends than tons of acquaintances. Also takes me a long time to trust.

My husband has similar anxieties, although his seem more worry and rumination. In social situations, his reaction is opposite of mine- he overcompensates and tries to be entertaining and the life of the party, which can put a lot of people off- gets annoying fast.

I know it isn't for everyone, but medication can help. I was on an antidepressant for about 18 months 12 years ago, and it helped set me straight, helped me feel more comfortable in my own skin. Hubby is on a low-dose now, and it has really helped his worry and anxiety. He plans to eventually go off of it, too. Again, I know meds aren't always the right answer, but sometimes a little bit helps.

From what you said, you sound like a lot of fun. I enjoy people with your sense of humor. I know it's hard, but don't beat yourself up too much.
 
I know I'm fun and have great sense of humor, cause it takes a lot for me to laugh and I laugh at my stuff all the time ;)

. I'm the same way with control. I have to have it!!!! I am pretty laid back tho too, it's more I just need a plan. I don't like surprises.

I've also exhausted the pool of single women here I think. I'm 33, divorced, don't want kids (and cannot, snip snip) and also an atheist. The biggest issue is the kids. I just don't want them, and even don't really LIKE them. I deal with them enough teaching martial arts!!

I have a lot going on in my head. I've been dating a gal for about a month who seems to be great. But she literally has no free time, but we make it work. The struggle is of course I don't feel like she really likes me, even if the evidence is there. And when we do make plans, they change a lot which for someone who likes control....drives me nuts.

I also may be moving in summer. A close friend wants me to move with her to Miami. She thinks leaving this town/state would be a good thing for me, as I'm clearly in a rut. While I've travelled the world, I've always lived here in Des Moines. My family will not be very accepting of this, which plays no role in my decision, but creates drama and arguments.

I literally cannot live in the moment either. Past experiences have scarred me, and I always wonder about the future. Will this new gal I'm dating work out and then what about the move??? Do I even tell this person about my plans yet? When do I tell my parents, or even my employer??

I've done the meds before, probably 4 years ago. Made me even more depressed and I got off of them. Had more suicidal thoughts and figured I would rather feel scared to do it, then apathy. I go to my counselor every month.

I think the move could be good as it would be something different. More potential for things to do, diff people, and maybe more opportunity in job market (tho I do really well here in dsm, and cost of living is soooo cheap).

Was more just curious if others have these type of issues. Guess good to know I'm not alone. What's sad is that I can come on here and describe these issues, I know I have them, but I literally can do nothing to fix them. Obviously I do have control but something in my head keeps me from ever getting over the hump
 
I had it really bad when I was halfway through high school. I was up until 2 or 3am every night, writing down every little thought that popped into my head on my arms. I'd wake up with writing from my knuckles up to my elbow, all completely insignificant stuff like "check what time sun came up" that seemed extremely important at 1am; if a thought popped into my head I'd try and ignore it, but I got really stressed out and couldn't relax until I wrote it down. Then I'd be okay for a few minutes until another thought came.

I saw two counsellors at school and through the help of both totally got over that problem but I still get anxious a fair bit, mostly because I feel inferior as a person because I see all these people hooking up, dating, getting married or having kids around me. I don't begrudge them that at all, that would be shameful, but there's not often a day goes by where negative thoughts about that sort of thing pops into my head as I've always struggled forming relationships. Cos I'm 22 now, not 16 anymore. I've had a full-time job for about 15 months now as a sports journalist but I often feel inferior in that as well, because I seem to be getting outdone everywhere I look. Sometimes I also get anxious when heading out to bars or nightclubs, though just as often I don't get anxious at all. There's no doubting I still have a bit of anxiety though. My appetite is way smaller than it used to be, which is not good as I'm pretty damn skinny, and sometimes even if I'm hungry I can't really eat.

Strangely enough though I'm a very social person. I absolutely love meeting new people, and if someone is willing to get along with me then generally speaking I'll get along with them. I went on a youth camp in December 2011 and found it changed my life somewhat, and I was invited back as a leader in December last year, which I found immensely rewarding. So in those sort of situations I have no anxiety whatsoever; in fact I really enjoy challenging myself and getting out of my comfort zone.

I am pretty worried about a friend of mine though. Unlike me, he has an actual disorder, at least I'm sure he does. In high school, from years 8-10, he was one of the loudest, most obnoxious, funniest people I knew. He was often very crass and could be quite offensive, though. Anyway when school got more serious in years 11 and 12 he went into his shell, and by year 12 he was a nervous wreck. Four years since we graduated and he is still a nervous wreck, a shell of his former self. He doesn't look good, hasn't made any friends since year 12 and has shown no real signs of improving. I don't think he'll take his own life but it's a dire situation and I never really know what to do.
 
It's so interesting how it varies from person to person. Mine is less general like the forms described above.

I get physically ill when it pops up - it started occurring in social situations (U2 concerts, of all things; it really sucked), and then spread to general social situations, and now has spread to other situations. I've learned to anticipate what situations might bring it on, and take a pill proactively to stop the symptoms from starting and giving my body a break.
 
Upset stomach and my heart feels like its racing.
 
BEAL said:
More mental. Lack of confidence, always seeing negative or feeling like the negative is going to happen which creates stress.

Can't trust anyone. Can't ever be happy I can meet a great gal but find that I get the feeling I'm walking on egg shells and its only a matter of time before something bad happens.

I do counseling, I am extreme in my working out and nutrition (because I don't want to be out of shape), I'm not a big drinker, and Im not around those who do drugs.

My family is very negative so I've had to distance myself from them but its tough to completely avoid them.

I don't have a lot of friends because I don't feel comfortable around everyone. Takes a loooong time for me to trust and I'm a bit of a blunt person and I always joke around so takes a certain type of person to like my humor. Basically if you can handle Seth McFarland then we can get along.

But I just feel like no matter what I do, I have this feeling it won't be good enough. Ill be replaced at work, in a relationship or anything else.

Succcckkkkkksss
Click to expand...

I'm not a therapist, but the most I could say about being negative all the time is that sometimes you just have to believe that everything will be OK and see people in a positive light until you really get to know them.

I know that may not be easy to go along with, because even I find it hard. I tend to think that optimism is like a drug, because it makes you feel good and makes you think the world is good, when in truth it really isn't. But optimism is a much better option than being negative, especially for physical reasons.

As for your family, I have a similar problem. My dad can best be described as a helicopter parent who does not allow me to live my life at all, even though I am 30 years old. We have no relationship at all and there is a lot of drama between us. I do what I can to distance myself but its not easy when you don't have the finances to move away (I'm my parents' tenant). So yeah, I kind of hear you on the stress a family can give.
 
^I think there's a hell of a lot of truth to positive thinking. 'The Secret' may have been some psuedo-psychological bullshit dressed up in a fancy cover to make a lot of money, but the core message, thinking positively breeds positivity, and the opposite, has a great deal of merit to it.
 
^ that's what's so frustrating, if only the mind could listen and stop running over the same rubbish over and over until it's useless. :|



My life has fallen into before and after.

Before I had a full time job, managed my time very efficiently, was hardly ever stressed or freaked out, made time for family, husbands family and all sorts of stuff.

It's a long and complicated story but after began not long after leaving my husband. It was a long thought out decision and the right thing to do but he wasn't a monster and didn't treat me like crap so not many people understood. People were supportive but comments like, "you'll come to your senses" and "if you'd had a baby it would have worked" amongst others took it's toll.
anyhoo, now I struggle work part-time somewhere else, live behind my parents house and struggle to get by..

some days are ok, most days the littlest of things freak me out. Deciding what to wear or knowing I'll have to go to centrelink can lead to hours of tears and awful thoughts of not being worthy of even leaving the house, often i'll stay in bed til late so i don't have to deal with the world. My housemate sees a weeping mess, me staring into space for hours doing nothing, freaking out at the shops and having to leave or telling him off for the randomest of things. It's just awful, I understand how people lose their minds...it's more comfortable than where my head is now. I barely speak to friends, they won't understand, I'm not interesting or will bring them down, never have any spare cash to do fun things ...it's ridiculous really as I'm so very lonely.

I'm no good at expressing my feelings. Therapists can be fooled far too easily, tell em what they want to hear ...one told me that things are going wrong because of me....well yeah I know that. :doh:

Customers at work say I'm so happy and a ray of sunshine. I can be but when you leave I'll be doubting every word and movement you made... Medication isn't really helping.. :shrug:
 
My wife suffers from anxiety and depression. The Depression started after her mum died and straight after the wedding it hit her (with nothing else to look forward to, or keep her mind occupied.) Then came the Anxiety. She was unable to socialise, put fuel in her car among other things what hurts the most is we haven't been out doing anything together like a lunch or hell even coffee in over a year now. She gets the shakes and feels as if she needs to use the bathroom all the time.

We're going to inspect a house to purchase tomorrow and she is so nervous about it she has already gone to bed early feeling sick. I find it hard to deal with because I grew up in a family if you were sick or whatever you eventually just got on with it....whether that is healthy or not, I don't know.

She is slowly getting better. There is no time frame for when she will be better. My Nan lost her husband 4 years ago and only now is she happy again.
 
Yes, I had a really hard time with anxiety off and on through childhood up until halfway through college. It was social anxiety disorder and depression.

When I was in Kindergarten, it started out as a fear of vomiting in public, so I'd obsess about my stomach and whether or not I felt sick and refused to eat very much. First grade was better, but it came back in second grade and was so bad that I was throwing up almost every day before school, so I had to get counseling. It got better until eighth grade, when I started having severe panic attacks in social situations like school, church, or if I was invited to someone's house, so I had to get counseling again. My palms would sweat, my mouth would go completely dry, my heart would race, and my stomach would churn. That round of anxiety was due to depression, which I struggled with through high school.

I think having anxiety during formative teenage years ruined my social skills and made me avoid unnecessary interactions with people. I feel bad about all the times I turned down invitations to go out with friends because they had no idea what I was going through and probably thought I was a snob. I never had a boyfriend because the thought of going on a date was more terrifying than anything else, so I have little or no real dating experience. That's a little embarrassing to admit at my age, but I never got involved with that yet.

I had all kinds of methods, from carrying a "worry stone" (which I still carry in my pocket out of habit), to sitting in the front of a crowded classroom so I couldn't see how crowded it really was (that really helped as long as I didn't turn around). I prayed a lot, and I listened to ATYCLB on the bus in eighth grade to keep panic attacks away. In fact, getting interested in U2 gave me something new to think about and that helped me a lot.

In high school, I had a computer class before speech class (which was the worst thing ever for someone with anxiety) and the teacher had inspirational sayings on the wall that she printed off the internet. One of them said "Every breath is a gift from God." And I thought, ...Even the ones used for giving speeches? Yes. So I decided to look at life as an adventure instead of a terror and to stop caring what other people think. I can't be afraid of them if I don't care what they think of me. I also learned that I tend to get depressed if I don't have enough to do, so I try to keep my mind busy.

So, the conclusion of this long post is that life really is an adventure and I'm not going to waste any more energy worrying about what other people think of me, because most of them are too busy thinking about themselves, anyway (as Mom used to say, and she was right!).
 
Anxiety/ stress is really part and parcel of my job. I'm a film producer, and dealing with the day-to-day stresses of managing so many different moving parts during a shoot, liasing with all the departments, trying to meet the demands of financiers and dealing with the constant deluge of problematic precious snowflake individuals can be a nightmare at the best of times. I suffer from insomnia, restlessness, loss of appetite and just terminal tiredness. Sometimes I wonder why I do this. I'm 30 and have over a million in investment accounts, so I could realistically get out of the game now. But once you're out of this industry, you're out. It's ultra competitive, there's always someone willing to work harder for less. And I have to ask myself - what the hell do I do with the rest of my life? It's tough. I've considered therapy, but I'm doing a lot of research to find the best ones. I have friends who have been on the "therapy circuit" and found many to have been little to no help at all, despite charging the earth.
 
lemonfly said:
Anxiety/ stress is really part and parcel of my job. I'm a film producer, and dealing with the day-to-day stresses of managing so many different moving parts during a shoot, liasing with all the departments, trying to meet the demands of financiers and dealing with the constant deluge of problematic precious snowflake individuals can be a nightmare at the best of times. I suffer from insomnia, restlessness, loss of appetite and just terminal tiredness. Sometimes I wonder why I do this. I'm 30 and have over a million in investment accounts, so I could realistically get out of the game now. But once you're out of this industry, you're out. It's ultra competitive, there's always someone willing to work harder for less. And I have to ask myself - what the hell do I do with the rest of my life? It's tough. I've considered therapy, but I'm doing a lot of research to find the best ones. I have friends who have been on the "therapy circuit" and found many to have been little to no help at all, despite charging the earth.
Click to expand...

This is simply my suggestion, and I probably don't have the slightest clue about your work situation, but I just want to help.

Do you know what keeps you in the business? Is it because you love film, enjoy having your own company, get a thrill of being in a competitive field? Maybe you can use whatever it is that keeps you where you are to stay where you are? Or, take things down a notch and be a smaller company to relieve the stress?

As for therapists not being so great, I understand the frustration. I've had therapists who were in it because they probably didn't know what else to do with their lives, or liked the idea of criticizing their clients just to feel better about themselves. I have a good one now, which I am so grateful for, but it does suck having to deal with therapists who shouldn't be one.
 
I've been realizing that I have been very anxious as of late. Maybe its something I've had for a long time and I just didn't notice because I didn't have the physical symptoms like I did in college.

But yeah, I get stressed over the slightest things and it can be silly. Sure, feeling anxious over my future and my finances is normal. But I get anxious over how rude, arrogant and inconsiderate people can be, and it that fear makes me go crazy. There's really nothing I can do about people like that, no matter how much they suck, and even though worrying gives a feeling of control, it won't solve the world's problems. So, live and learn.
 
I found out that one of my friends is getting married and the thought of being a bridesmaid causes me anxiety. I don't know if I will be or not, but it's very likely. :uhoh:
 
It will be fine. Everyone will be looking at the bride, believe me :)
 
I've had anxiety on and off for years, probably most of my life. Usually in a relatively mild form, but about 4-5 years ago I had a truly unpleasant episode where I spent months feeling like nothing around me was real, like I was constantly in a dream and no one around me, even the people I loved, was real either. That passed thank god. I think I feel generally better since I radically changed my eating habits a year ago, as well.
 
There are times when I have high levels of anxiety. Life is extremely stressful right now. Married with two kids. I'm the only one working because we can't afford a babysitter because we live in a community where everyone is well off. It was a good idea when we moved here five years ago when it was just one kid. Because I'm taking off with my career and school, I'm stressing out on how I'm going to pay the rent and bills. All I pretty much do is go to work and then come home. I'm glad we will be moving out of our place in the next few months. I'm so tired of being upset, anxious and worried all the time. I'm already anxious as it is. I worry about everything. It sucks. :(
 
Anxiety disorders suck. They can ruin friendships, marriages, families and other relationships. They can be treated, but I don't think they ever go away completely. So, if you have one or someone you love does, seek help and don't stop getting help even when you start to feel better...because they can sneak back up on you when you're not expecting it.
 
U2Mama said:
Anxiety disorders suck. They can ruin friendships, marriages, families and other relationships. They can be treated, but I don't think they ever go away completely. So, if you have one or someone you love does, seek help and don't stop getting help even when you start to feel better...because they can sneak back up on you when you're not expecting it.
Click to expand...

So true. You're already feeling awful about your anxiety, but to know others think less of you makes you feel worse.
 
I eventually told some of my friends at school about my anxiety problems so that they would know what was going on, and they had no idea. Most people can't tell and I guess I was hiding it pretty well. My parents told my teacher about my anxiety when I was getting counseling in eighth grade. She didn't say or do anything about it but it was good to know that she was aware of my situation.
 
My anxiety is taking its toll on me, and I'm starting to wonder just how much damage I've done to myself.

I've been incredibly stressed out over everything lately, and I really have no reason. A lot of what I've been afraid of usually never happens, but I still worry myself sick. And I mean sick! I'm having aches in my joints lately, and I constantly feel the need to stretch but it never helps. My lower back, or rather spine, aches as though the bones itch. A couple of times I had tingling and cramping problems in my legs that I could barely sit for long, and I can only take so much Advil.

I have an appointment with a neurologist next week. I can't believe I've worried myself sick like this, but I can't seem to stop. It's like I'm so used to freaking out that I don't know any other mindset and any other is so foreign, I don't know what to do.

I wish I could afford a yoga class to learn to balance mind and body more.

:scream:
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

B
How are GA Tickets being transferred to new buyer?
Replies
4
Views
408
rosephile
R
Snowlock
Sphere "app" and Apple Wallet
Replies
10
Views
2K
Snowlock
Snowlock
Achtung_Bebe
IO: It's been a while...
Replies
2
Views
720
mikal
mikal
C
Hello Hello... Hola!
Replies
1
Views
665
prbiker15
prbiker15
S
Hello there!
Replies
0
Views
249
skipdaly
S

Latest posts

Back
Top Bottom