Why Must One Find A Mate?

[Trash Can]

it IS???

Why???

[LarryMullen's POPAngel]

Originally posted by Trash Can:
Hmmm... I HAVE already "found what I am looking for"!
And because I have found it, I am now working on myself, and then perhaps I will choose to find someone.



Peace.

Awesome. I'm 23 and still searching, but then again I'm the type to still be searching at 43! So, who knows? But I'm glad you've found it, Trash.





------------------
"Enough of this video bullsh**, I'm going to give you some culture. Know what I mean?" -Larry, ZooTv Era

"the soul needs beauty for a soul mate"

-April

[Trash Can]

Originally posted by LarryMullen's_POPAngel:
Awesome. I'm 23 and still searching, but then again I'm the type to still be searching at 43! So, who knows? But I'm glad you've found it, Trash.

Just so there is no confusion. What I have "found" is Jesus Christ.
As to where I used to know about Jesus, I now KNOW Jesus. A "personal relationship".
Thats really what matters most. All else can come after this fact. All else I will "leave behind".


Peace



------------------
My love for you
It's in the things I do and say
If I wanna live I gotta
Die to myself someday.
Surrender.

[LarryMullen's POPAngel]

I knew what you were talking about, Trash.



------------------
"Enough of this video bullsh**, I'm going to give you some culture. Know what I mean?" -Larry, ZooTv Era

"the soul needs beauty for a soul mate"

-April

[]{arao]{e]

Originally posted by TrashCan:
Seriously, I AM trying to figure out WHY I "want" or "need" someone, more than just a "good friend". Is it for the sex? Is that a bad reason? Is it for the closeness, love, and intimacy one can only find in a person one falls asleep in the arms of and wakes up with every morning.

Cuz you're human...DUH!

It can be a bit frustrating when all you see and hear everyday is LOVE songs on the radio and Romances on t.v. (it always turns out that there's a "love" interest between the female and male leads).

Also, when you go to public places and see gals with their boobs bursting out or guys with no shirts or a happy family... anyway you get my drift...
I get to questioning myself too: "Why am I not hitched at 25?"

Anyway, it all stems from our innate desires for the opposite sex. And Satan plays on that and tries to distract us from what's really important.

There are many different types of love. The bible says that in the last days there will be a loss of "natural affection". Thus, a lot of people confuse lust with love.

But I totally agree with some of the statements made in reference to Paul in the Bible and the fact that you need to grow up some before you can make the kind of sacrifices needed for a happy married life.
(I've met so many guys who want to marry so the gal will "take care" of them)

I thank God that I wasn't raised in a family or society that forces arranged marriages and that I have the freedom to choose who I want to be with.

Thanks for sharing



[This message has been edited by ]{arao]{e (edited 09-13-2001).]

[Trash Can]

Originally posted by ]{arao]{e:

It can be a bit frustrating when all you see and hear everyday is LOVE songs on the radio and Romances on t.v. (it always turns out that there's a "love" interest between the female and male leads).
B][/QUOTE]


Hmmmm... One of the things I HAVE learned is that most ALL "love songs" and TV romances are unreal! They are a dis-service to anyone seeking guidance as far as real love. They dwell on "needing" someone and on the mythical "everlasting bliss" (that, in fact, dies soon enough in a relationship and devotional love has got to be made a choice).

Anyway. Thanks for your thoughts. I honestly thought this thread was long gone.

God bless America


------------------
My love for you
It's in the things I do and say
If I wanna live I gotta
Die to myself someday.
Surrender.

[Like O2]

Originally posted by Trash Can:

One of the things I HAVE learned is that most ALL "love songs" and TV romances are unreal!

Okay, this may sound SO weird or gross, but what the heck......

When listening to love songs on the radio, alot of times I think about how much I love God and/or Jesus, instead of romantic love. Really, it works, try it.

Okay, here's something else I never thought I'd admit on interference......

I love "that" Celine Dion song...NOT, NOT, NOT for any other reason but that I think of God's love for me.

Here are some of the words....

Maybe I don't know that much
But I know this much is true
I was blessed because I was loved by you

You were my strength when I was weak
You were my voice when I couldn't speak
You were my eyes when I couldn't see
You saw the best there was in me

Lifted me up when I couldn't reach
You gave me faith 'coz you believed
I'm everything I am
Because you loved me

You were always there for me
The tender wind that carried me
A light in the dark shining your love into my life
You've been my inspiration
Through the lies you were the truth
My world is a better place because of you


If the "you" in that song is God and/or Jesus, it's really very beautiful.....well, it is to me......okay, I'll quit now.


------------------
If they knock you down get right back up. That's the only way to do it. ~ Elvis Presley

[Trash Can]

Celine Dion!?????????????

Eileeeeeeeeeeeeeen, say it isn't so...Say it isn't sooooOOoooOOOooOOOOoooOOOoooo!!!

.

.


... Yeah, the words are nice, I guess.

I still prefer "You Light Up My Life", by Debbie Boone.

Or even "The Rose" by Bette Midler.

THERE... Thats two of my "secret shames"

... I wonder if Wynona Rider like "The Rose"...Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

[Like O2]

Originally posted by Trash Can:


I still prefer "You Light Up My Life", by Debbie Boone.

Or even "The Rose" by Bette Midler.

Gag, cough, gag.........

[Trash Can]

... Celine Dion???

I think you have NO right to "Gag, cough" at me, young lady!??

... Its Saturday night... and here we are in Interference... Sad, eh??

I know! I'll try a lil excitement!... I'll go to the Interference Chat room!!!

[Like O2]

Originally posted by Trash Can:
Its Saturday night... and here we are in Interference... Sad, eh??

I know! I'll try a lil excitement!... I'll go to the Interference Chat room!!!

Well, did the chat room provide any excitment?



[This message has been edited by Like O2 (edited 09-15-2001).]

[Trash Can]

Originally posted by Like O2:
Well, did the chat room provide any excitment?

[This message has been edited by Like O2 (edited 09-15-2001).]

Yes... It sure did, and it cleared up a lot too!

[Vorsprung]

So OK, 95% of all romantic love songs are totally crap. But you know you're IN love when you cath yourself singing along to a Backstreet Boys love song............


(Vorsprung has been there and still is very ashamed of himself)

------------------
Vorsprung durch Technik

[Like O2]

Originally posted by Vorsprung:

(Vorsprung has been there and still is very ashamed of himself)

*pats Vors on the back*

"There, there Vors....I feel your pain! Don't be ashamed, we've all done it."

*O2 leaves thread humming an old Air Supply song*



------------------
If they knock you down get right back up.
That's the only way to do it. ~ Elvis Presley

[Like O2]

[This message has been edited by Like O2 (edited 09-18-2001).]

[travu2]

Why must one find a mate?

External stimuli set in motion certain biochemical/physiological responses within the biological system that affect its behavior. Corresponding emotions reinforce the "desire" for the source of that stimuli. The object of this desire detects the behavioral cues and becomes aware of the intent. During their existence, both systems had felt that desire, sometimes very strongly. However, soon after the encounter, one becomes highly critical of the other; all of the gathered data is analyzed and it is determined that the desperate behavioral displays are not adequate. Certain criteria must be met before it can satisfy its need to produce or acquire a bundle of molecules that it can take to soccer games and raise in its image.

I'm not really this black and white.

------------------
I am scared of the robot
that tucks me in at night.
Methodical movements once again
result in a kiss.

[Trash Can]

Ohhhh... I seeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

NOW I get it!
Thanks, Travu2!

... interesting homepage too... So... explain THAT one!


Peace on Mars
(cause Earth won't have it)

------------------
My love for you
It's in the things I do and say
If I wanna live I gotta
Die to myself someday.
Surrender.

[majxtc]

I love you 'cause I need to...
Not because I need you.
I love you 'cause I understand,
That God has given me your hand.
He holds me in a tiny fist,
And still I need your kiss

-- Luminous Times (Hold On To Love)

So, why must I find someone?

Our need for a mate - even though it seems like common sense, I find it as one of the profound mysteries of life. I believe, a good part of it is that we are made in the image of God and God, in some odd way, actually has a need or desire for us. I like how martha said it -’it's the echo of God in us’.

The question above has been echoing in my mind quite a bit lately. It has even been a major theme in my dreams the last few days. My wife died from breast cancer 3 1/2 years ago at the age of 35. I am raising my 3 children on my own and often wonder if I am doing an adequate job at it. As time passes, it just seems to get worse. I can step back and look at my house in it’s perpetual state of disorder and disrepair and think ‘If anyone saw this house, they could conclude that whoever lives here is in bad need of a wife or at least a housekeeper’. If one could look into the condition of the 'home of my soul', they might come to a similar conclusion.

There quite a bit more that I wrote for this post, but it probably was too personal for anyone's good, so I left it out. I've read all the posts in this thread and appreciate all the thoughtful discussion. It still leaves me with a nagging question of 'How in the world can I be a capable parent and/or mate when I struggle so much with how insufficient I am in what I'm currently required to do?' (I can't even get rid of those obnoxious little fruit flies that have invaded my kitchen for the last few weeks.) I apologize for the negativity of the post, but I may just be 'stuck in a moment and I can't get out of it'.

[Klodomir]

Majxtc, I'm really sorry to hear about your situation, but there is a way out. The key is to start loving yourself. You are doing you very best for your kids during trying times, so pat yourself on the back for that instead of feeling guilty about your inadequacies.

Now... I don't particularly want to go on a crusade, and I don't normally push this on people, but to me your post looks like a cry for help, and I have found something which has helped me. You are absolutely on the mark when comparing your house with your soul.

My advice to you is to go to http://www.flylady.net and sign up. Just give it a try. I swear to you, it has changed my life, and it's not only about getting your home in order. I realize that the list is mainly aimed at women, but 1% of the subscribers are men, and it's working just as well for them. You're also very welcome to email me if you want to know more (see my profile).

Good luck!

[Trash Can]

Majxtc,
Bless your heart. I am truely sorry about the loss of your wife.

But, you know what?... You WERE able to be with her here on this earth, even if it was not for a very long time.

You may not see it this way, but she WAS truely a gift from God, to you. I pray that you can look back at the good times you spent together and find comfort in that.

As for the "slob issue"... I hear ya, brother!!



I have never been married, and I don't have any children. At times, I feel blessed that I have not had to subject my constant selfishness and bad personality traits onto people that I am supposed to be loving. But at times.... DAMN, I get lonely!

So, is "finding a mate" for the purpose of not being lonely??? That seems like a selfish reason to me.

I still CAN'T get it right.
At present, I am desperately trying to end a "friendship" with a married woman, because I CANNOT be "friends". Not with her, or any other kind and caring woman out there. It sucks, but I instantly slide into that damned "needy" mode whenever I encounter a person like this. Sucks for me, huh???

Anyway,
"I've said too much...that's me in the corner...blah, blah, blah."

Majxtc, its too bad you did delete most of your post... Your thoughts couldve helped and brought comfort to some of us.
Maybe next time.

Peace

------------------
My love for you
It's in the things I do and say
If I wanna live I gotta
Die to myself someday.
Surrender.