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blueyedpoet said:
wilbur, what does using toys have to do with being a lesbian?
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She is posting her sexual preference, hence I asked a sexual logistics question.

Why the tension in your post?

Wil
 
Lara Mullen said:


Woud you consider adopting a child in the future? Do you think society needs to be more educated about the gay community and, therefore, people would be more open to the idea of gay marriage? Do you feel in anyway inferior in certain situatons (such as in school, the workplace etc) because of your sexuality? What do you think can be done to combat homophobia? Do you or would you, ever consider campaigning for gay marriage, gay rights etc.

Doozer can answer too, if she wants :)
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I don't know that I would personally consider adopting a child. But I don't see anything wrong with gay couples adopting. For me, in my last relationship, she had a daughter that still considers me her step mom and I am very much a part of her life and my grandchildren's. Currently, Caron has a 16 year but our relationship is much different because the circumstances are different.

I think educating people to be tolerant of gays is certainly key to helping them overcome their fear of the unknown.

As far as feeling inferior, I don't remember the last time I felt that way. In my current job, I came out on the first day! And, I have been accepted there. Fortunately, I work in a Health Department and because of the Youth Health Education and the HIV Education we do, we do have a staff that is about 20% gay. I don't think discrimination would be tolerated there.

And I am not afraid of who I am. For instance, last night we were in Santa Monica in a straight bar and I was holding Caron's hand and being somewhat affectionate with her. I guess I am at an age where I don't really give a shit what other people think about me. And I am also very fortunate to live in a city that has a high gay population.

As for gay marriage, I don't really know that I am for it or against it. I am, however, for equal treatment for all people. Having had a "gay marriage" and a "gay divorce", it may have made my opinion of it slightly tainted. I know when we dissovled our partnership, we only needed to send a notarized copy of the paperwork to Sacramento. Now, gay couples actually have to get a lawyer to dissolve domestic partnerships. So, they are on their way to equal treatment.

Any other questions for me, the older lesbian? :hyper:
 
The main character, played by Sharon Stone, was bisexual. Her girlfriend was protrayed as a bit of a nutcase, which was why I asked the question. But if you don't remember the movie you're probably better off!:wink:
 
Do Miss America said:


How old are you? Maybe just a hint? And I'm curious as to when you came out and if was much harder then than it is now?
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I am 43.

I came out in different stages, actually. I knew at an early age that I liked girls. I have a gay nephew that is 3 years younger than me and when we were kids, we would pretend to be Sonny and Cher and you can guess who played who! :D

I actually kissed a girl for the first time in 7th grade. For her, it was probably just a phase. For me, it was so much more. It was a turning point. I also had another girlfriend in high school, although we didn't call each other that. She was not gay so that was her experimentation phase.

I told my sister first. I think I was about 22 (1983). I was threatened by someone which forced me to tell my mom. It was by far the most difficult thing I have ever done. The whole Catholic guilt thing and disappointment to the family. As for Mr BAW, he told me he knew and I have never had this conversation with my father. I think with the rest of my family, it was just a given.

The only time that I ever felt that I "came out" was that first day at the Health Department 5 years ago. And it was totally accepted. In fact, the clerical staff would ask me questions, similar to this thread.

I think it puts people a little more at ease when you are comfortable within yourself and willing to share about your lifestyle so they can get a better understanding.

As far as it being easier to come out now, I am not sure. Certainly in the last 20 years, we see a little more acceptance but I think the whole coming out process is different for everyone.
 
Do you have guy;s hit on you all the time? And when they try and flirt with you do you just come out straight and say your a lesbian? Or what do you do to turn them down? Because I had an experience like this, and what are the signs that woman are lesbians?
 
macphisto23 said:
Do you have guy;s hit on you all the time? And when they try and flirt with you do you just come out straight and say your a lesbian? Or what do you do to turn them down? Because I had an experience like this, and what are the signs that woman are lesbians?
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Guys hit on me a lot, sometimes they hit on me more when they find out I'm gay.:rolleyes:

But you do the same thing you would if a woman hit on you and you aren't interested. Just be honest and don't play games.

You know one of my best friends is a straight man who gets hit on by gay men all the time. He's almost too polite about it because he tries really hard not to offend or come off like a homophobe. I tell him, just tell them the truth.

As far as signs go. This is what I have to say. Every sexuality has the extremes. You have very masculine straight men and those we now call metrosexuals. You have very masculine gay men and feminine gay men. You have butch lesbians and those that are more feminine. These lines of feminine and masculine are all made up by society. If you are out at a bar, party, etc you know when there is a connection, you can tell from across the room. Some will wear it on their sleeves and some won't, but that's life.
 
Do Miss America said:
I often feel like a subject rather than a person
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I'm sorry you feel that way. So all I'd like to ask is whatever you most feel like sharing about yourself that has absolutely nothing to do w/ you being gay.
 
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