I feel like such an idiot.

[love_u2_adam]

Well my best friend is a guy. We use to love each other, but then we grew apart this last month and a half. Yesterday was the first time we'd been together in a really long time. And i have my feelings for him once again but he says im to needy and immature. Like i can only be as mature as i am given im only 16....i don't get him sometimes, he does treat me bad a lot and i treat him bad a lot. but i mean i care about him so much but hes acting like i mean nothing. We got into this huge fight last week and it made me so sick i ended up in the hospital, he called me angry at me. When i went to Ottawa for 4 days he missed me so much when i got home he got my flowers and took me out. I miss that, maybe he doesn't want me cause im around but if i left for 2 week I'd love to know what would happen because that's what im doing. I'm leaving up north for maybe 2 weeks. Just thinking about this makes me really sad. I know he does care but is to man to show me because i did hurt him so he's put on a face but i don't know i'd love some advice on it.

 

[Bonochick]

To me, it sounds like a really unhealthy relationship. If you love each other and care about each other, you should not be treating each other badly. I realize that couples aren't going to get along all the time and are going to have fights, but...

he says im to needy and immature.

...

he does treat me bad a lot and i treat him bad a lot.

...

hes acting like i mean nothing. We got into this huge fight last week and it made me so sick i ended up in the hospital, he called me angry at me.

...that's not right.

People can get along and care about each other as friends just fine...but that doesn't mean that those people would be well-suited to be a couple. Perhaps that's the situation you are in. It's not impossible for a romantic relationship to work...but you both have to want it and be willing to work at it.

 

[Galeongirl]

that definately does NOT sound right! no matter how much you love him, it might be a better idea to lose contact with him for a while...

 

[WildHoneyAlways]

I know he does care but is too man to show me because i did hurt him so he's put on a face but i don't know i'd love some advice on it.

First bit of advice? Don't make excuses for him. When I was 16 I knew plenty of guys who showed their friends and/or girlfriends they cared about them. The way he's acting has nothing to do with him being "to (sic) man."

If he's going to pick a fight with you, you don't have to participate. I know it's hard but it does not seem productive in this situation. Why put yourself through that? No one is worth making yourself sick over. Lose his number for a while.

 

[vaz02]

Just to clear things up :

Were / are you two just friends or an item ?

 

[love_u2_adam]

umm item.....

im gonna try and cut him out of my life for a while agian, yes ive done it more then once. but ill add more tomorrow because its 1 am but it's why i cant quite him...

 

[Screwtape2]

Kayla, no man no matter how you feel about him has the right to treat a woman the way he has treated you. You are a wonderful, fun person and no one may ever hurt you so bad you have to go to the hospital. You are a strong woman and shouldn't give people that don't respect that the time of day. You are a wonderful person and deserve to be treated much better than this.

 

[DaveC]

You are a wonderful person and deserve to be treated much better than this.

You are a wonderful person and deserve to be treated much better than this.

You are a wonderful person and deserve to be treated much better than this.

You are a wonderful person and deserve to be treated much better than this.

You are a wonderful person and deserve to be treated much better than this.

DTMFA.

 

[Bonochick]

DTMFA.

Must you be so crude? I think it's pretty disrespectful, especially since she obviously cares about the guy.

Unless this acronym means something other than what I've come to know it to mean, of course...which, if it does, please share.

 

[BonosBaby12]

Kayla I think it is best that you cut your friend from your life for some time too. You are a sweet girl and you do deserve a lot better then what you are getting

 

[WildHoneyAlways]

Must you be so crude? I think it's pretty disrespectful, especially since she obviously cares about the guy.

Unless this acronym means something other than what I've come to know it to mean, of course...which, if it does, please share.

I had to go to Urban Dictionary to find out what it means. I'm old and out of touch.


And you can quit him! You will be better for it.

 

[LMP]

Must you be so crude? I think it's pretty disrespectful, especially since she obviously cares about the guy.

Unless this acronym means something other than what I've come to know it to mean, of course...which, if it does, please share.

Dump the motherfucker already.

 

[kafrun]

Dump the motherfucker already.

Ooh, I like that *steals*

 

[vaz02]

I had to go to Urban Dictionary to find out what it means. I'm old and out of touch.


And you can quit him! You will be better for it.

so did i and im only 19

 

[DaveC]

Must you be so crude? I think it's pretty disrespectful, especially since she obviously cares about the guy.

Unless this acronym means something other than what I've come to know it to mean, of course...which, if it does, please share.

I meant it as "Dump The MotherFucker Already". And I make no apologies if that's what you thought it was (although I've never heard of any other meanings for it).

What did you think it meant, anyways?

 

[love_u2_adam]

ugh we aren't dating....

like i mean i know more about him and his life then his wife will probably know. Hes been through a ton of crap. it's hard to leave him cause he was my first and he hurt me then too. I walked away for 7 months with my now ex boyfriend, the for the last 5 months we've been tight. When we first met 2 years ago it was like we both looked into each others soul. I want to be his wife! But we both need to grow up and that's why i wont date him. I think that's why he thinks i tease him. i did run off with his best friend when i first broke up with my boyfriend and that really hurt him and he always bring it up. ok first off all i can say is im fucking sorry and i regret it. How do i show more?!? I'll be ok im leaving this horrible town and people so i think it'll be a good break and yes im running away from my problems.

He's 19 i forgot to say that lol..

 

[Laura M]

ugh we aren't dating....

like i mean i know more about him and his life then his wife will probably know. Hes been through a ton of crap. it's hard to leave him cause he was my first and he hurt me then too. I walked away for 7 months with my now ex boyfriend, the for the last 5 months we've been tight. When we first met 2 years ago it was like we both looked into each others soul. I want to be his wife! But we both need to grow up and that's why i wont date him. I think that's why he thinks i tease him. i did run off with his best friend when i first broke up with my boyfriend and that really hurt him and he always bring it up. ok first off all i can say is im fucking sorry and i regret it. How do i show more?!? I'll be ok im leaving this horrible town and people so i think it'll be a good break and yes im running away from my problems.

You really don't want to be involved in a mess like this. You are very young. You have lots of time to meet a great man and think about marriage. This bloke is certainly not much of a husband if he's married.

 

[love_u2_adam]

what he isnt married ahaha but who ever he does in the end i will know more about him then she will lol.


but ya im done with it...

 

[Night & Day]

where t-f is a smackyouupsidethehead smiley.
Or how about a chainyouupuntilyouare21 smiley.

Oh child.
You need this one the most though ray:

 

[Laura M]

what he isnt married ahaha but who ever he does in the end i will know more about him then she will lol.


but ya im done with it...

Ooops, sorry. This dude does not sound like he has been much of a boyfriend. You don't need to be with someone who will hurt you. You deserve much better.

 

[love_u2_adam]

he isnt nice hes a total frickin dick...and i do deserve more. But im happy being single right now, i dont go for a lot of guys

 

[LMP]

ugh we aren't dating....

like i mean i know more about him and his life then his wife will probably know. Hes been through a ton of crap. it's hard to leave him cause he was my first and he hurt me then too. I walked away for 7 months with my now ex boyfriend, the for the last 5 months we've been tight. When we first met 2 years ago it was like we both looked into each others soul. I want to be his wife! But we both need to grow up and that's why i wont date him. I think that's why he thinks i tease him. i did run off with his best friend when i first broke up with my boyfriend and that really hurt him and he always bring it up. ok first off all i can say is im fucking sorry and i regret it. How do i show more?!? I'll be ok im leaving this horrible town and people so i think it'll be a good break and yes im running away from my problems.

He's 19 i forgot to say that lol..

I think you're confusing your feelings for him. You obviously have some connection with him, but neither of you guys are equipped to know if it is "love" or even handle it if that truly is the case. That's not meant as a slight on either of you, just something I've gathered. I have a girlfriend right now and we both share great feelings between each other... if it's actual love or something else, we don't know, but if it ever gets to a point where we'd feel uncomfortable, we'd have to cut each other lose. It'd be hard, but you'll be hitting yourself if you stay in a degenerative situation when you could be having so much more, you know? It's not entirely his fault, nor is it entirely yours, but if you've got nothing holding you down, you should go elsewhere.

That's my 2 cents, for whatever it's worth.

 

[Liesje]

I think you're confusing your feelings for him. You obviously have some connection with him, but neither of you guys are equipped to know if it is "love" or even handle it if that truly is the case..

I agree. It sounds like you are in love with the idea of him as your first and your first real relationship, how tight you feel with him....but not really HIM, you know? It sounds like you want it to work out so you are trying to make excuses for him and yourself. It's OK to realize it didn't work out and move on. You have to look at what it is, not what it was or could have been. Go on vacation, don't think about him, enjoy your vacation being single. Perhaps when you come back you won't feel so attached to the idea of being with him or what could have happened.

 

[love_u2_adam]

i know. It's hard letting go and i don't know if i can.. like seriously..fuck.
Well see when i come back how i feel.. it could be im just lonely for someone and this is the cure.
i mean i havent really done anything or gone anywhere for the last 2 months. so idk

 

[Carek1230]

You are young and have so many years ahead of you for fun, boyfriends, relationships, etc. I think the most important thing you can do in order to be happy (and it helps get over heartache from break ups quicker) is to completely believe in and love yourself. If you can be completely OK with being single and contentadly happy with yourself in all ways, then that makes you a more solid person, a healthier individual and it also allows you to enjoy healthy relationships too. You don't have to be in a relationship in order to be complete or be completely happy. From what you've shared, the guy sounds like sort of a jerk. And if this has been the first *real* love, it will be one you will get over, and you will heal and grow from it, but you will never ever forget it.

 

[love_u2_adam]

well that brought a tear to my eye....

you always know how to make me cry!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Carek1230]

Didn't mean to make you cry, just that from what I gather you DO have a good head on your shoulders and a good heart (your parents raised you right, girl!) and that you are young so you have lots of time ahead of you. So be patient with life, have fun, love yourself and basically be a good person. Your life will be surprisingly rewarded.

 

[Night & Day]

Oh, and take your pill.

:wink;

 

[gman]

Dont lay all the blame at the guys door. She sed in her original post she treats him badly too. Sounds like a typical pair of kids to me!

 

[sue4u2]

so idk

I think you do know.
Stop second guessing yourself.
You're instincts are on the right track.