College freshman commits suicide after sex tape posted on internet by roommate

[Jive Turkey]

There is no outbreak of bullying or of gay kids killing themselves. There was one somewhat notable incident because of the use of social media. After that, the media jumped on a bunch of other incidents that would have otherwise not made it outside of their communities. That doesnt make these deaths any less tragic, but it's not worse than its ever been

[Irvine511]

Originally Posted by Jive Turkey

That doesnt make these deaths any less tragic, but it's not worse than its ever been

while i agree, what i do think is important is that we now how how bad it is and has been for years.

it is absolutely true that it might seem like it's an epidemic, it probably isn't. just like all these missing kids and "Amber Alerts" make us think that there's more of a problem than there actually is. kids are kidnapped every day, kids kill themselves every day. we just now hear of it more, and the social media aspect gives it a contemporary hook as well as a sense of impending danger for older parents who don't know very much about "The Face Page."

however, the important thing, i think, is that we are now aware of problems that once received scan attention, and it's what might be known as a "teachable moment." right wing anti-gay groups deny all over the place that gay kids kill themselves at higher rates, and we all know that's horseshit.

[Jive Turkey]

Originally Posted by Irvine511

however, the important thing, i think, is that we are now aware of problems that once received scan attention, and it's what might be known as a "teachable moment." right wing anti-gay groups deny all over the place that gay kids kill themselves at higher rates, and we all know that's horseshit.

can't argue with that

[A stor]

Thank you Angela for your kind words. We did our best as parents. My grand daughter is being raised with the same values. Respect and kindness towards all others.


My God, what kind of monsters would attend Sladjana's funeral and laughed at her?


I was a teeager once, we all were. There were exchange students from Europe who attended my high school. We thought they were "cool!" We loved their accents, asked them about their countries and never made fun of them. It makes me sick that the parents of these monsters think there is nothing wrong with their kid. I'm telling you there is something seriously wrong with them. Physcotic perhaps? This is not normal behaviour for anyone.

I know it is a different generation now. But, to go to a funeral and laugh at the loved one who died? Is beyond me.

My generation wasn't perfect, far from it. But, I know one thing for sure. None of my childhood friends would have attended a funeral of a class mate and thought it was funny. We would have been crying.

[A stor]

Originally Posted by Jive Turkey

There is no outbreak of bullying or of gay kids killing themselves. There was one somewhat notable incident because of the use of social media. After that, the media jumped on a bunch of other incidents that would have otherwise not made it outside of their communities. That doesnt make these deaths any less tragic, but it's not worse than its ever been

Actually, I am seeing this in my own neighborhood. Parents who are too young to take on the job of parenting are letting the kids "fight it out." Even as young as kindergarden. Children are punching each other in the face.

While, I was growing up. If you were in the back alley, screaming at another kid. Your mother brought you inside. Sat your little butt in a chair and you couldn't go outside until you learned how to play nice.

I'm sorry, but parents were tougher parents back then. We were not allowed to hit or call each other names. We would get punished for it. Each and everytime.

Bullies were not popular. The other kids wanted nothing to do with them. Making them friendless. This taught them. To get it together if they wanted friends. Most of the time they did. Even saying "I'm sorry" and becoming a best friend to the child they picked on.

My mom had three rules when I was a teenager. 1. The school better not call me. Meaning they would only called if you were misbehaving or not doing your homework. 2. The police better never come to our house because of you. 3. Don't you ever get in trouble with a boy. She figured that covered everything.

[Pearl]

Originally Posted by A stor

My God, what kind of monsters would attend Sladjana's funeral and laughed at her?


I was a teeager once, we all were. There were exchange students from Europe who attended my high school. We thought they were "cool!" We loved their accents, asked them about their countries and never made fun of them. It makes me sick that the parents of these monsters think there is nothing wrong with their kid. I'm telling you there is something seriously wrong with them. Physcotic perhaps? This is not normal behaviour for anyone.

I think the term you're looking for is psychopathic. Psychopaths have no remorse and don't care when one of their victims dies, or in this case, commits suicide.

I agree, something is very wrong with young people today. The lack of remorse and laughter over someone's suicide is troubling. I have read articles that teenagers' brains are not as developed as adults, but is there another factor coming in here? Has technology and social networking ruined human interaction? Are parents these days really that bad? What is going on?

[Jive Turkey]

Just saw my girlfriend post this in the facebook newsfeed

It Gets Better Project


While reading through all the posts here, where people are asking 'what's wrong with these bullies?' 'where were the parents?', I just keep wondering 'where were their friends?'. Life can be shitty sometimes for everyone. Whether its from bullying, relationships, work, whatever. The only thing that sometimes makes things bearable is someone to talk to. Even if a friend didn't come to me first and I noticed they were down, I'd always try to talk them through things and cheer them up. Apart from teaching kids not to bully and to be respectful and nice to other people, it's equally important to remind them that a little unsolicited kindness, even to a stranger, can make a world of difference. I cant help but think how these kids lives could have been saved had someone just took it upon themselves to randomly sit down next to them at the lunch table and made them feel wanted

[financeguy]

Is there any statistical proof that teen suicides are increasing?

[anitram]

Originally Posted by A stor

My God, what kind of monsters would attend Sladjana's funeral and laughed at her?

I am as docile as you get but I think that if I were there they might have walked away with a couple fewer teeth, frankly.

[A stor]

Originally Posted by Pearl

I think the term you're looking for is psychopathic. Psychopaths have no remorse and don't care when one of their victims dies, or in this case, commits suicide.

I agree, something is very wrong with young people today. The lack of remorse and laughter over someone's suicide is troubling. I have read articles that teenagers' brains are not as developed as adults, but is there another factor coming in here? Has technology and social networking ruined human interaction? Are parents these days really that bad? What is going on?

Thank you Pearl that was the term I was looking for. Have some young people become so numb, they can not relate to another's feelings?

Sadly at my age, I have been to many funerals. None of them were a laughing experience.

Social networking and technology. Was non-existent in my youth. You had to deal with people, face to face. Being accountable for your words and actions.

Still there is the factor of parents who should be knowing what their child is doing. "While you live under my roof. Your life is my business." Not fair, tough. No one said it would be.

It is quite easy for one parent to phone another. When the problem first starts. Or alert the school their child is attending. What shocks me is that nothing is being done, until it is too late. These young people didn't kill themselves because they were only teased once. The abuse they suffer has gone on for months, even years and everyone has their breaking point.

[Moonlit_Angel]

Originally Posted by A stor

Thank you Angela for your kind words. We did our best as parents. My grand daughter is being raised with the same values. Respect and kindness towards all others.

Good . And you're welcome.

I'm kinda ashamed to admit, though, that I agree with this post:

Originally Posted by anitram

I am as docile as you get but I think that if I were there they might have walked away with a couple fewer teeth, frankly.

I may not have actually done that, but I sure would've thought about doing it, or something similar, at least. I hate the idea of resorting to their level, but honestly, laughing at the funeral...that's just sick. And heartless. I sincerely hope somebody put them in their place for that behavior and kicked them out.

I hate to do the whole, "What's wrong with kids today?" thing, though. This isn't unique to this generation. If social networking had been around in the 1950s, or the 1920s, or 1800s, or whatever, these same problems would've existed then, too. And had we had the kind of 24 hour news media Khanada alluded to in their post, we would've heard about this stuff more often back then, too.

Every generation has its cruel kids, its bullies, today's society is no better or worse than the previous ones. And if those bullies grow up to spawn new bullies, the cycle's going to continue until somebody finally has the sense to put a stop to it. Plus, once again, we need to start targeting adults for their bad behavior just as much as we do kids. Especially given that by definition, being an adult means you're supposed to know better than to act like a jerk.

Angela

[A stor]

Originally Posted by Moonlit_Angel

Good . And you're welcome.

I'm kinda ashamed to admit, though, that I agree with this post:



I may not have actually done that, but I sure would've thought about doing it, or something similar, at least. I hate the idea of resorting to their level, but honestly, laughing at the funeral...that's just sick. And heartless. I sincerely hope somebody put them in their place for that behavior and kicked them out.

I hate to do the whole, "What's wrong with kids today?" thing, though. This isn't unique to this generation. If social networking had been around in the 1950s, or the 1920s, or 1800s, or whatever, these same problems would've existed then, too. And had we had the kind of 24 hour news media Khanada alluded to in their post, we would've heard about this stuff more often back then, too.

Every generation has its cruel kids, its bullies, today's society is no better or worse than the previous ones. And if those bullies grow up to spawn new bullies, the cycle's going to continue until somebody finally has the sense to put a stop to it. Plus, once again, we need to start targeting adults for their bad behavior just as much as we do kids. Especially given that by definition, being an adult means you're supposed to know better than to act like a jerk.

Angela

I agree Angela. Bullying is much easier now, than in generations past. And you are right, there have always been bullies. That is my point. "Life lessons begin at home." Children look to their parents, learning how to function in the world around them.

I'm not saying that adults who were abused as kids. Can not raise wonderful children. They certainly can and most often they do. But, teaching them the right values and respect. Begins long before high school.

[deep]

Lured Into a Trap, Then Tortured for Being Gay

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/10/09/ny...as.html?src=mv

[A stor]

OMG...this literally makes me sick to my stomach. The attackers should recieve life in prision with no chance of parole. Attempted murder should be added to the charges.

[BVS]

Originally Posted by financeguy

Is there any statistical proof that teen suicides are increasing?

In every teenage age group there's been a slight increase since 2001.

[A stor]

Originally Posted by BVS

In every teenage age group there's been a slight increase since 2001.

Thank you BVS for the information. It is very sad when a young person takes their own life.

I graduated in 1974. Around 1200 kids for grades ten through twelve. Two of my class mates died from drowning. One because of an unintentional drug overdose. Zero because of suicide.

1200 kids in one school. At least ten percent of the population is gay. Do the math. No one was bullied like I am reading in these horror stories. Because my HS would have never permitted it. If you beat another kid in the face. You were automatically expelled. No question about it.

[nathan1977]

Originally Posted by deep

Lured Into a Trap, Then Tortured for Being Gay

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/10/09/ny...as.html?src=mv

Disgusting.

[financeguy]

Originally Posted by A stor

Thank you BVS for the information. It is very sad when a young person takes their own life.

I graduated in 1974. Around 1200 kids for grades ten through twelve. Two of my class mates died from drowning. One because of an unintentional drug overdose. Zero because of suicide.

1200 kids in one school. At least ten percent of the population is gay. Do the math. No one was bullied like I am reading in these horror stories. Because my HS would have never permitted it. If you beat another kid in the face. You were automatically expelled. No question about it.

With respect, this is all strictly anecdotal, we cannot extrapolate into assuming that gay students are less tolerated or more subject to bullying in schools as compared to a previous generation - surely it's the opposite if anything?

I am also deeply sceptical of the assumption that bullying is something new in schools, even of the suggestion that it has somehow massively increased in recent years - BVS has already cited the stats that stated that suicide rates among teens have only shown a slight increase - and that might be due to better reporting. Or, actually, it might be nothing to do with peer pressure, it might be due to the pressures they're being put under by their so-called elders and betters - have we considered this possibility?

In Ireland at the moment, it's quite fashionable to be gay, a lot of the young fellas walk around the place as though they were auditioning to be presenters on Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. I accept America is different, with the organised homophobia promoted by some of the right wing churches.

[nathan1977]

Ohio's Mentor High School Under Scrutiny After Spate of Suicides

Four kids in the same school, bullied for different reasons.

[Irvine511]

i went to a low-key fundraiser last night for the "It Gets Better Project." we raised over $10K. it was a nice evening.

and then i saw the gay torture story, and i wish i were surprised. it's really not surprising that gay kids -- minority kids in cities, white kids in rural America -- are under threat when the right wing feels it perfectly appropriate to present gay people as a clear and present threat (a gathering storm?) to children, to families, to God, to the military, to the continuation of life on earth.

please understand that -- even here, in FYM -- your words have an effect upon the psyches of young gay men and women, as well as the transgendered, the bisexual, and the questioning.

the Pope, Maggie Gallagher, the Republican Party -- anyone who has demonized gay people for political gain has blood on their hands.