Pregnant

[absintheminded]

Help, I'm pregnant, I know I'm 30 and I have a stable job and my financial status is not in danger. I have all my bills up to date, I don't smoke or drink or do drugs, and it seems like a perfect time to have a baby, and my family is supportive.
the only problem is is that the baby is the spawn of a married man of whom I've been having an affair with for the past EIGHT years. We love each other but he is totally committed to his wife, they already have one child and he would like more, but she is too old for more children. I seriously doubt he would leave his wife and child for me and the new baby. But I'm against abortion in silly matters like this, especially since I can give the child a wonderful home and a wonderful childhood. Although, I've grown up without a father myself and I know what a huge absence it is and I hurt for a father even now. I don't want to starve my child of a father.
What should I do?

 

[partygirl43]

I sorry you have to go through this...but heres what I'd do:

Have the baby. (because you said you don't beleive in abortion, and you can give the child a good home)

Leave the Married Man.(because he isn't going to leave wife, and srsly, do you need that?)

Meet nice new man who likes kids.(happens all of the time...and you need someone 100% committed to YOU)

Good luck, I hope everything works out for you.

 

[mikal]

I sorry you have to go through this...but heres what I'd do:

Have the baby. (because you said you don't beleive in abortion, and you can give the child a good home)

Leave the Married Man.(because he isn't going to leave wife, and srsly, do you need that?)

Meet nice new man who likes kids.(happens all of the time...and you need someone 100% committed to YOU)

Good luck, I hope everything works out for you.

yeah, i'd agree with this.

does the married man know about this yet?

 

[Fernando-]

I sorry you have to go through this...but heres what I'd do:

Have the baby. (because you said you don't beleive in abortion, and you can give the child a good home)

Leave the Married Man.(because he isn't going to leave wife, and srsly, do you need that?)

Meet nice new man who likes kids.(happens all of the time...and you need someone 100% committed to YOU)

Good luck, I hope everything works out for you.

Agree.

 

[Chizip]

is this guy the prison guard you fell in love with while in prison?

 

[Cin]

I agree with everything already said.



Nosey question. What are you going to say when people ask who the father is?

 

[Sicy]

Help, I'm pregnant, I know I'm 30 and I have a stable job and my financial status is not in danger.

Wow you are still 30?? I wish I could stop aging like that.


Good luck. Not a fun situation to be in but I'm sure you'll do what you think is right.

 

[Chizip]

If it's a girl, I think a beautiful name would be Skyy

 

[Salome]

What should I do?

they wouldn't trust me with decisions this important at work

 

[BoMac]

 

[absintheminded]

BoMAC, I don't get it.

Salome, I don't trust myself with decisions like these- haha.

Chizup, you must stop stalking me, seriously. Prison guard was so seven months ago and that never lead to anywhere. Skyy? Are you kidding me? That was one of my favourite names I've chosen. I know you're reading my old posts so please refer to September 2007 where I confess I'm having an affair. Same man.

Sicy, I just turned 31 (oops) . I didn't celebrate it so I've continuously say I'm 30. Wth, I sure don't look 30. Or 31.

And Cin, you are not being nosey, it's a very important question, what the hell am I going to tell people? I had a baby with a popsicle? With a guy and we broke up days after I got pregnant? I had a one night stand? Worse, what am I going to tell the child?

Mikal, NO I haven't told the father about this. What if he hires a hit man to kill me?
You never know these days. People kill over stupid things.
I'm sure he wouldn't hurt me, but I'm not so sure he'll be supportive. Oh yeah have a baby, ruin my life, no, he's not going to just roll over and take this with a smile!
(Oh yeah I should mention he's a millionaire- his parents own the franchise of a huge construction company- which makes divorce for him even a worse option, his wife might get huge alimony?)

Hope this answers all your questions.

 

[coolian2]

if this thread is a joke, it's brilliant.

if it's serious, it's still funny.

 

[absintheminded]

Really?!

Why...

 

[redhotswami]

if the father's name is nate, then the wife might already know

 

[Liesje]

Have the baby, leave the man, consider it your new start.

 

[Liesje]

Oh yeah have a baby, ruin my life, no, he's not going to just roll over and take this with a smile!
(Oh yeah I should mention he's a millionaire-

A millionaire that can't afford some condoms...

 

[coolian2]

A millionaire that can't afford some condoms...

or a brain, or some general decency....

 

[VintagePunk]

What if he hires a hit man to kill me?
You never know these days. People kill over stupid things.

Wow.

 

[anitram]

Lulz.

 

[absintheminded]

Liesj, it's so funny you say that. I've been through a TON of shit the past few years, total hell that I would NEVER go through again. Rehab, jail, fighting with family, you name it, I've done it. I've been through it.
Now I'm finally in a good spot in my life. I've got a great job, I travel A LOT, I've got good true friends, I rarely see my family- which is good- because we can't get along when I'm around them, I have my own life, no drink no drugs, no smoke, shit- I've even quit Red Bull upon learning about my pregnancy.
I was so depressed a couple of years ago I gained twenty pounds. Now I've lost THIRTY pounds and I'm finally happy with my body.
I am not going to comment on the no condom thingy, we did use condoms, but it took one time to fail.
No it's not Nate. But yes, I do think the wife knows. She's called me and asked me to stop calling her husband. He's told me that she constantly looking thru his cell phone to see if my number is on there. She calls him every hour on the hour. We have a mutual friend and the friend told me that the wife knows exactly who I am. So if she's not a complete idiot, she knows.
I'm just going to have the baby, I want to not tell him about it, but shit, what if he finds out later? What if the kid wants to know who the dad is? Should i work out a plan to keep this a secret and have him secretly involved without the whole world knowing he has cheated on his wife?
I'm so........... screwed.

 

[U2isthebest]

Did this affair take place in Atlanta, Germany?

 

[Angela Harlem]

Liesj, it's so funny you say that. I've been through a TON of shit the past few years, total hell that I would NEVER go through again. Rehab, jail, fighting with family, you name it, I've done it. I've been through it.
Now I'm finally in a good spot in my life. I've got a great job, I travel A LOT, I've got good true friends, I rarely see my family- which is good- because we can't get along when I'm around them, I have my own life, no drink no drugs, no smoke, shit- I've even quit Red Bull upon learning about my pregnancy.
I was so depressed a couple of years ago I gained twenty pounds. Now I've lost THIRTY pounds and I'm finally happy with my body.
I am not going to comment on the no condom thingy, we did use condoms, but it took one time to fail.
No it's not Nate. But yes, I do think the wife knows. She's called me and asked me to stop calling her husband. He's told me that she constantly looking thru his cell phone to see if my number is on there. She calls him every hour on the hour. We have a mutual friend and the friend told me that the wife knows exactly who I am. So if she's not a complete idiot, she knows.
I'm just going to have the baby, I want to not tell him about it, but shit, what if he finds out later? What if the kid wants to know who the dad is? Should i work out a plan to keep this a secret and have him secretly involved without the whole world knowing he has cheated on his wife?
I'm so........... screwed.

You're not screwed. Your baby might be if half the stuff you post on here is true.


If you have any common sense, use it. Make wise decisions. That's all you can do. This probably includes not asking interference for advice.

 

[BoMac]

Did this affair take place in Atlanta, Germany?

 

[mikal]

Mikal, NO I haven't told the father about this. What if he hires a hit man to kill me?
You never know these days. People kill over stupid things.
I'm sure he wouldn't hurt me, but I'm not so sure he'll be supportive. Oh yeah have a baby, ruin my life, no, he's not going to just roll over and take this with a smile!
(Oh yeah I should mention he's a millionaire- his parents own the franchise of a huge construction company- which makes divorce for him even a worse option, his wife might get huge alimony?)

i really hate to even say this, but that thought went through my mind. it has been the premise for at least 10 Law & Order episodes i've seen.

 

[absintheminded]

Angela Harlem, I couldnt' agree with you more.
U2sthebest, not Atlanta Germany, what a random question, no. ?
Mikal, my sentiments exactly!

 

[absintheminded]

I just wanted real straightforward advice, people that are not afraid to take stabs at my personality or choices without real consideration of my feelings because they hide behind anonymity of a computer- so they can be as brunt as they'd like.
My family and friends are supportive, and say nothing is wrong about bringing a child into this world without a dad and at the same time of agreeing, I disagree to a fault. I know they just are being nice about it because they dont want to hurt my feelings or our relationship, ya dig? Now that's real!

 

[mikal]

one thing i wanted to mention too is that you might want to consult in a lawyer earlier than later. because the father has a lot of money and is well known, you just never know what his actions could be in the coming months and years, so it would be good to have some kind of legal representation.

 

[The Sad Punk]

I think you should get an abortion.

 

[U2isthebest]

I think you should get an abortion.

Is it terrible that I laughed out loud at that?

 

[Galeongirl]

I think you should get an abortion.

I think I agree with you. It's unfair to the child to raise it without a father, as the OP said she knows how bad it is. Besides that, what about the father's feelings? It's his child too! He obviously don't want it.

Having a child because you reach a certain age and might not have another shot is not a proper reason to have one.