To Headache:
For your birthday I will fashion you a female,
one so fine, and adorned in the finest chain mail.
A robot in disguise, a transvestite transformer, free sale!
I'll send it by UPS in a Brown-themed vail.
So haste to the post to hide it from the law,
to forever embrace this present from your Mounty Pa,
and keep that postage to reflect in shock and awe,
for it's not everyday you receive a horny package from Utah.
Happy Birthday,
From:
Canada.
America's goody-goody brother, who's never had a girlfriend. Not that I'm implying anything.- Homer.