A_Wanderer
ONE love, blood, life
I have spent years honing a good strong brood.
icelle said:2-3 years ago when i was going thru some very dark times. i did things that were out of character for me. it fees like there's no forgiveness for me on this. always in the back of my mind.
Irvine511 said:you know what's weird? the big mistakes i've made in my life, i don't grieve over. i also tend to agonize over every major decision, and thoroughly think things through, so that when all is said and done, even if it turns out to have been the wrong decision, i know exactly why i made that decision and can point to specific rationale as justification.
however, it's the little things that i agonize over. a thoughtless comment, some social malapropism, unwitting rudeness, or thinking back to childhood when perhaps you did things out of fear of social ostracism that you now regret. it's all emotional stuff that kills me, not the life decisions that seem to have more to do with intellect and reason.
but that's just me.
but, yes, i do know the agony, and i do know the sleepless nights wishing you could go back and change things. and sometimes you can. you can apologize, but more importantly, you can atone.
Bono'sTyee said:I think for the things that were out of my control tend to haunt me...like my parents divorce and all the things involved in that. And I'm not so much angry at the person but what they did. And the only consoling thing I can think of is that what they did can keep eating at me until I'm defeated or I can just say to myself that it wasn't my fault and just keep on keeping on.