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Old 10-17-2007, 11:58 PM   #376
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See, I can't even tell if YOU'RE serious.

Clearly, I'm having a major malfunction here.
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Old 10-18-2007, 01:08 AM   #377
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Well, let's just say I'd rather vote for Colbert than Hillary.
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Old 10-18-2007, 01:10 AM   #378
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Are you talking about Stephen Colbert or Stephen Colbert?

South Carolina is his home state, in case you didn't know...
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Old 10-18-2007, 01:40 AM   #379
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Stephen Colbert fo sho'.
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Old 10-18-2007, 01:43 AM   #380
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Stephen Colbert the character on the show or Stephen Colbert the real person?

Character = conservative...

Real person = liberal(I think)...
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Old 10-18-2007, 01:45 AM   #381
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Stephen Colbert the Stephen Colbert.
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Old 10-18-2007, 03:01 AM   #382
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didja see the threatdown tonight?
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Old 10-18-2007, 03:07 AM   #383
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Old 10-18-2007, 12:29 PM   #384
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I guess I'll just sit back in amusement and watch it all play out. Good times!
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Old 10-18-2007, 02:03 PM   #385
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Quote:
Originally posted by corianderstem
So ... I don't get it. What's this about only running in South Carolina? Is that his way of being official without really officially running? Or is he only campaigning in South Carolina?

Then what happens if he wins there? Nothing, right? Because if I understand correctly, he's serious about running, but let's say he wins there - he's not seriously running beyond that, right?
From how I understand it:

Yes. Yes. Nothing. Right.

I think last night he said he has to get something like 2% of the South Carolina vote to get one delegate at a convention. I read somewhere, he just wants to hear "The great state of South Carolina casts one vote for Stephen Colbert."

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Old 10-18-2007, 03:11 PM   #386
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I love how he was cracking up last night & cursing. The blended "drink" was a little pulpy, right?
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Old 10-22-2007, 05:18 AM   #387
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NY Times Op Ed

My friend just sent this to me:

October 14, 2007
Op-Ed Columnist
A Mock Columnist, Amok
By MAUREEN DOWD

I was in my office, writing a column on the injustice of relative marginal tax rates for hedge fund managers, when I saw Stephen Colbert on TV.

He was sneering that Times columns make good “kindling.” He was ranting that after you throw away the paper, “it takes over a hundred years for the lies to biodegrade.” He was observing, approvingly, that “Dick Cheney’s fondest pipe dream is driving a bulldozer into The New York Times while drinking crude oil out of Keith Olbermann’s skull.”

I called Colbert with a dare: if he thought it was so easy to be a Times Op-Ed pundit, he should try it. He came right over. In a moment of weakness, I had staged a coup d’moi. I just hope he leaves at some point. He’s typing and drinking and threatening to “shave Paul Krugman with a broken bottle.”

I Am an Op-Ed Columnist (And So Can You!)

By STEPHEN COLBERT

Surprised to see my byline here, aren’t you? I would be too, if I read The New York Times. But I don’t. So I’ll just have to take your word that this was published. Frankly, I prefer emoticons to the written word, and if you disagree

I’d like to thank Maureen Dowd for permitting/begging me to write her column today. As I type this, she’s watching from an overstuffed divan, petting her prize Abyssinian and sipping a Dirty Cosmotinijito. Which reminds me: Before I get started, I have to take care of one other bit of business:

Bad things are happening in countries you shouldn’t have to think about. It’s all George Bush’s fault, the vice president is Satan, and God is gay.

There. Now I’ve written Frank Rich’s column too.

So why I am writing Miss Dowd’s column today? Simple. Because I believe the 2008 election, unlike all previous elections, is important. And a lot of Americans feel confused about the current crop of presidential candidates.

For instance, Hillary Clinton. I can’t remember if I’m supposed to be scared of her so Democrats will think they should nominate her when she’s actually easy to beat, or if I’m supposed to be scared of her because she’s legitimately scary.

Or Rudy Giuliani. I can’t remember if I’m supposed to support him because he’s the one who can beat Hillary if she gets nominated, or if I’m supposed to support him because he’s legitimately scary.

And Fred Thompson. In my opinion “Law & Order” never sufficiently explained why the Manhattan D.A. had an accent like an Appalachian catfish wrestler.

Well, suddenly an option is looming on the horizon. And I don’t mean Al Gore (though he’s a world-class loomer). First of all, I don’t think Nobel Prizes should go to people I was seated next to at the Emmys. Second, winning the Nobel Prize does not automatically qualify you to be commander in chief. I think George Bush has proved definitively that to be president, you don’t need to care about science, literature or peace.

While my hat is not presently in the ring, I should also point out that it is not on my head. So where’s that hat? (Hint: John McCain was seen passing one at a gas station to fuel up the Straight Talk Express.)

Others point to my new bestseller, “I Am America (And So Can You!)” noting that many candidates test the waters with a book first. Just look at Barack Obama, John Edwards or O. J. Simpson.

Look at the moral guidance I offer. On faith: “After Jesus was born, the Old Testament basically became a way for Bible publishers to keep their word count up.” On gender: “The sooner we accept the basic differences between men and women, the sooner we can stop arguing about it and start having sex.” On race: “While skin and race are often synonymous, skin cleansing is good, race cleansing is bad.” On the elderly: “They look like lizards.”

Our nation is at a Fork in the Road. Some say we should go Left; some say go Right. I say, “Doesn’t this thing have a reverse gear?” Let’s back this country up to a time before there were forks in the road — or even roads. Or forks, for that matter. I want to return to a simpler America where we ate our meat off the end of a sharpened stick.

Let me regurgitate: I know why you want me to run, and I hear your clamor. I share Americans’ nostalgia for an era when you not only could tell a man by the cut of his jib, but the jib industry hadn’t yet fled to Guangdong. And I don’t intend to tease you for weeks the way Newt Gingrich did, saying that if his supporters raised $30 million, he would run for president. I would run for 15 million. Cash.

Nevertheless, I am not ready to announce yet — even though it’s clear that the voters are desperate for a white, male, middle-aged, Jesus-trumpeting alternative.

What do I offer? Hope for the common man. Because I am not the Anointed or the Inevitable. I am just an Average Joe like you — if you have a TV show.



Copyright 2007 The New York Times Company
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Old 10-25-2007, 04:19 PM   #388
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Quote:
Originally posted by Lancemc
Well, let's just say I'd rather vote for Colbert than Hillary.
Same here.

Unfortunately, some problems are springing up that could impede his candidacy:

http://www.abcnews.go.com/Politics/V...3766656&page=1
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Old 11-01-2007, 05:57 PM   #389
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Surprise ... Surprise !!



Colbert won't appear on SC ballot
By JIM DAVENPORT, Associated Press Writer
1 hour, 20 minutes ago


COLUMBIA, S.C. - South Carolina Democrats squashed Stephen Colbert's fanciful White House bid on Thursday.

Colbert, who poses as a conservative talk-show host on the Comedy Central cable network, filed to get on the ballot as a Democratic candidate in his native South Carolina. His campaign paid a $2,500 filing fee just before the noon deadline, said state Democratic Party Chairwoman Carol Fowler.

However, after about 40 minutes of discussion by top party officials, the executive council voted 13-3 to keep the host of "The Colbert Report" off the ballot.

"He's really trying to use South Carolina Democrats as suckers so he can further a comedy routine," said Waring Howe, a member of the executive council. And Colbert "serves to detract from the serious candidates on the ballot."

But state Rep. Gilda Cobb-Hunter told the committee Colbert could showcase the state "in a way that none of the other candidates on the ballot have been able to do."

"I think you're taking this a little too seriously," she said.

When Colbert announced his candidacy on his show last month, he said he would run only in this key primary state. He said then he planned to run as a Democrat and a Republican — so he could lose twice.

The GOP filing fee is $35,000; the deadline was Thursday night.

Democrats say he will get his $2,500 back.
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Old 11-01-2007, 11:42 PM   #390
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Bastards.
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