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Old 08-26-2001, 06:06 PM   #1
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Political Activism

When I think of the word ‘revoltionist’, I think of protestors. I think of peaceful protestors, anarchists, political minorities, terrorists, freedom-fighters, hot-dog salesmen and the occasional poor bastard of a writer who says the wrong thing about the wrong religion. Clearly, in a world with an incredible amount of possibilities and discrepancies, I am Already guilty of the terrible crime of generalization. Its a vulgar crime, and if there was a death penalty attached to it, I would’ve been dead a long time ago. However, in this case, I have to make general assumptions in order to be able to write something so that you people who have nothing better to do than to read drivel can actually read something (see, I just did it again). If everyone was truly afraid of generalizing, we wouldn’t be able to form opinions, write about them and start blood-thirsty wars and kill each other over them. Generalisation, and the concepts such gives, is what makes the political world go round. That is why most people have lost faith in politics, and rightly so, that is why most people are of the opinion that politics aren’t worth a camel’s pickled kidney. However, 4 out of 10 people who say that politics aren’t worth a damn and claim to have no interest in it whatsoever end up having heated and extremely passionate debates over politics, all the time making themselves look the more ridiculous.

The best position to be in - or to be more precise, mine- is to constantly satirise yourself so that when it comes to politics, no one will take you seriously. The fact is that no one really knows anything about politics, since its such a retarded subject. Our dearly departed prophet of all That-Is-Universal (which, is.. er, everything) Douglas Adams explained that Astrology is really a system of make-believe that everyone makes up as they go along in order to explain things… rather like sport, religious institutions, transexualism, cuisine, the modern music industry and well, anything else we under-developed apes called homosapiens come up with. Politics can be added to that list, indeed, it is probably more absurd than Astrology and even more creative than the modern music industry will ever hope to be. With politics, you find yourself sounding obnoxious (but if you’re me, you don’t really mind), selfish and sometimes a tad bit fascist (what can I say, its my charm). Ultimately, no one really gives a rat’s right testicle about your political opinion, except yourself and maybe a couple of million if you’re the dictator of the country.

Politics is really a wonderful beast that changes sex, colour and appearance everytime the climate changes. One minute, you can be contemplating revolutionary ways of milking it the most efficient and cost-effective way, the next, you’re trying to stop the damn thing from licking your crotch. The moment you have an opinion on politics, you’re already out of date. That is why I don’t really like talking about politics outright. I’ll mention the economics (which, in reality, is just as bad as the rest of that make-believe list) behind politicians and their proposals. You can argue that Margaret Thatcher is the lost son of Adolf Hitler and expect people to argue with you, but if you quote an economic phenomenom and fact, they can’t really argue with you unless they’re really pig-headed and equally as ignorant. Economics is probably more factual than politics, though no one really cares about that one. People want to know who’s ruling the country, how they’re doing it and whether they’re going to be out of the job or not. Anything else is irrelevant and is argued by those who want to sound different and remotely interesting, like myself. This is where the revolutionists (not like myself) come in.

You always get people who are not happy. In fact, most people are realistic and truthful enough to admit that they are not completely happy and that the gigantic void in their life is getting bigger and bigger by the day, the other 5% are either indulging in self-denial or are on acid constantly. Anyway, you get people who are not happy about something. Most of the time, they like to think that they are unhappy with the political situation, when in fact they’re unhappy that they’re unemployed, of no use to society and drink too much, not to mention beat their wives and rape their children (well, maybe not that one, but it has been known). When people are unhappy, they tend to do something about it. Some turn to the bottle, some whine, some go and off themselves and some start up political rallies and sects. It is here where you get freedom-fighters, peaceful protestors and other political minorities. I will go through each and every revolutionary and present the case as I, and the society that have been awfully troubled by their existence, see it.

Peaceful protestors; you get many of these pleasant, but mainly useless life-forms. It truly depends on what you call ‘peaceful’. I may be a tad bit awkward, but I like to enjoy a nice peaceful day just sitting down quietly doing absolutely nothing at all and praising the riches a moment of silence and observation can bring. From a whithering leaf slowly being seduced by the wind’s proposals, to the orchestra of individual strands of grass that is the consistency of a lawn; nature isn’t all Mt. Etna and Hurrican Annie. However, I find peaceful protestors far from peaceful when they shout and march around like demented goons in a hapless search of God’s instructions. Peaceful? Picket lines and shouting is the most irritating form of protest, and frankly I can do without. In fact, most people who have better things to do with their lives can indeed do without. Peaceful protestors are, by definition, as useless as the next ‘peaceful’ protest these lost souls will inflict on a convention. In retrospect, those who believe in their own political motives, such as Anarchists and Basque Separatists, won’t really accomplish anything because a peaceful protest merely irritates and doesn’t take any real action. Those who do have genuine reason for protesting, such as those vegetable-throwing bundle of geniuses in Europe who attacked President Bush on his frankly embarrassing tour, won’t accomplish anything either. Therefore, what on Earth is the point to it all? No one really listens to them, because most of them are unemployed ignoramuses who have nothing better to do, except go suicidal (which, in some cases, would prove most beneficial to society) and beat their wives. Still, you could do worst than peaceful protestors.

Anarchists; Somehow, these belong under the ‘peaceful protestors’ section. They are just as idiotic and pathetic, and are equally as harmless in intellectual proposition. From the moment any Anarchist opens his or her mouth, and talks about decentralization and devolution of entire nations, you should know that he or her induces more credibility by stating that Hitler should be canonized. They really should be smiled and nodded at when they confront you with their lunacy.

Political minorities; this is an incredibly vague and equally retarded classification. In theory, we are all political minorities. I would certainly like to meet another Spanish/Mexican/English hybrid who adores Socialism and praises the realism of certain Right-Wing theories, while at the same time believing that Fascism holds the key to answering some social problems.
We are all different, we all have different problems, different realities, different conventions and different backgrounds, we are all minorities within a sructure; whether some of us wish to make something out of it and go around shouting “I belong to a political minority! Yes, that’s right! I belong to a political minority and my demands are not being met! You are tying to steal my individual integrity!”
The fact of the matter is that political minorities should grow up, just like a teenager having identity problems should. A political minority is a group of people who feel so alienated that they feel the need to alienate the very society that they occupy. The teenager who fears that he or she is ordinary, is not an individual and will be assimilated into the gigantic convention known as ‘society’ is really a terrible creature who fears an illusion. Every individual, by definition, IS an individual and is in their own way unique and special, hence the need to act differently and ‘BE’ an individual is really quite unecesary and an awful waste of energy. Therefore, the troubled teenager is much like the affirmed political minority, who fears that they will be assimilated into society, fears dissolution of their heritage and the destruction of their race. This fear motivates such activism and, inevitably, causes a lot of trouble for the country they occupy. Some minorities go onto ethnic musical groups and parade the streets with adorable displays of colourful bravery, some force their best writers to write a cracking paper on the wrongs of the tyrant society they live in, some turn to acts of violence, which is usually generalized by the undiscriminating ones as terrorism. Apparently, there is a thin line between fighting for what you believe in by blowing up civilians and terrorism. Personally, I can’t see much of a difference, but you may have a different perspective. In my most unhumble and pompous opinion, I believe that if anyone picks up a weapon and shoots Mr. Ordinary.I. Don’t Have Anything To Do With Your Anger in the name of their political and religious beliefs, that person can be classified as a murderer. I can argue that my world is being corrupted by the malevolent ignorance of a certain American President, that my immediate environment is being destroyed and scorched by the Ozone complications induced by his terrible tyranny, that my political beliefs are being compromised and that my religion is being critised (which it isn’t, since I don’t really have a religion) by his pitiful intelligence; should I pick up a weapon and shoot him in the head, wouldn’t that make me a murderer? I’d be saving the world, in theory, I would be taking out all of this aggression I’ve been feeling for such a long time, and, according to the rhetoric of freedom-frighters, I’d be fighting for what I believe in. There.
Unfortunately, I would still be a murderer and I would still be worthy of punishment. Political minorities who are particularly insecure about their heritage find enough anger in themselves to go around shooting people and blowing up buildings and cars. These are called freedom-fighters by some, however, since the very act of blowing things and people up must and does cause a certain amount of terror to society, they can be called terrorists; as in people who cause terror in their freedom-fighting.
Therefore, political minorities are quite troublesome for a country that is doing its very best for globalisation. They are insecure and therefore angry; they are the lost teenagers of an old society.

Terrorism; when political minorities get nasty, and peaceful protestors see how useless it is to be peaceful, they blow things up instead. From Albanian drug barons to Basque Separatists to the age-old problem with the IRA, terrorists are just as ineffective as peaceful protestors, though very effective when it comes to killing old grannies, sweet-faced brats and other innocent stereotypes of society. Terrorists should be termed as murderers, for they do murder people. However, what is even worse than a terrorist is someone who sympathises with acts of terrorism. These apparently ‘open-minded’ people achieve nothing in the end but harming society with their open-mindedness. These misguided muppets do not realise that to be open-minded doesn’t mean being open-minded to even the close-minded aspects of opinion; discrimination of what you allow in and out of your mind is a prerequisite of an open-minded, the lack of discrimination denies the quality of your ideas. However, the response terrorists receive from Governments are usually quite unanimous, they are ignored if not abhorred. Terrorism does not help society, does not improve the quality of life, and is really quite unsavoury.

Freedom-fighters; see Terrorism. (In actual fact, there have been some worthwhile freedom-fighters, the best example is Mahatma Ghandi, however, his methods of ressistance are now too old-fashioned for the typically impatient member of society who is angry and lacking in spiritual as well as intellectual strength; hence, see terrorism).

What appears to be the case is that anyone who is angry or unhappy about something should in fact do something about it, but not using the listed ways. What is at fault is the lack of imagination, for, if these activists had a consisderable amount of such, they would find new and inventive ways of fighting the system, like hot-dog salesmen and wrong-footed writers with issues. Hot-dog salesmen are so innovative that it’s a wonder why they don’t get the praise they deserve. The skill in frying an onion is one of the most underrated skills in the entire world, not to mention the impressive artistry of the entire process. However, how hot-dog salesmen make a difference in this world, will be discussed in the next drivel-infested essay about life, humans and other stuff that is completely irrelevant to such matters… (disappears in a cloud of irrational logic)…


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Old 06-08-2002, 08:28 PM   #2
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*wonders where Anthony has been lately*


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Old 06-09-2002, 06:58 AM   #3
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That post was a complete shock... not least of all because it was posted ages ago... needless to say I was upset about something or another. Anyway, I've been away for a while doing stuff, however, not sampling the wonders of being a hotdog salesman.

Razors pain you; Rivers are damp;
Acids stain you; And drugs cause cramp.
Guns aren't lawful; Nooses give;
Gas smells awful; You might as well live.

Dorothy Parker, 'Resumé'
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