My GF and I have been together for a year and almost 3 months, and we love each other very much. I have been introduced to her family, who is far from perfect, but I haven't said anything up to this point.
Her parents are split, she lives mostly with her dad and grandma, her grandma has cancer, and is widowed. Her mom has many problems, ranging from alcohol abuse to an abusive husband who threatens her. Her aunts and uncles have problems with drinking, abuse, and drugs. So you can see that my GF is pretty much the normal one.
There have been some things that I have said accidental, or just joking around that have offended them. I haven't realized this until my GF brought it to my attention. I felt so dumb, and it feels like whenever I go over to their parents or guardians house, it feels like I can't say anything right. I was unemployed for 3 months, and her family looked down on me because of that. Now that I have a job, they don't get on my case about it.
I have a habit of wanting to invite myself along so I don't feel excluded, but when I do at times, it feels like I don't mean to, or it was just a second nature. I think more the less, I just don't fit in with them. I feel so out of place, that it's just depressing. They want her to be around them a lot, mainly because she is their daughter, and I can see that I am getting in the way of things. But it feels like I'm never going to be able to amount to anything that they are expecting of me.
What do I do? I love being with my GF, and I love her, but I just don't know about her family. I am unaccepted in her family, but I treat her good, with the occassion of a few fights now and then.
I think part of it also, is that I have a perfect family, no drug abusive or anything like that -- and I think when I talk about my family, and the way we do things -- it has a tendancy to offend them. So basically, it's like I have to adjust myself, and my words, to not offend them. It's almost like I can't be myself...
Her parents are split, she lives mostly with her dad and grandma, her grandma has cancer, and is widowed. Her mom has many problems, ranging from alcohol abuse to an abusive husband who threatens her. Her aunts and uncles have problems with drinking, abuse, and drugs. So you can see that my GF is pretty much the normal one.
There have been some things that I have said accidental, or just joking around that have offended them. I haven't realized this until my GF brought it to my attention. I felt so dumb, and it feels like whenever I go over to their parents or guardians house, it feels like I can't say anything right. I was unemployed for 3 months, and her family looked down on me because of that. Now that I have a job, they don't get on my case about it.
I have a habit of wanting to invite myself along so I don't feel excluded, but when I do at times, it feels like I don't mean to, or it was just a second nature. I think more the less, I just don't fit in with them. I feel so out of place, that it's just depressing. They want her to be around them a lot, mainly because she is their daughter, and I can see that I am getting in the way of things. But it feels like I'm never going to be able to amount to anything that they are expecting of me.
What do I do? I love being with my GF, and I love her, but I just don't know about her family. I am unaccepted in her family, but I treat her good, with the occassion of a few fights now and then.
I think part of it also, is that I have a perfect family, no drug abusive or anything like that -- and I think when I talk about my family, and the way we do things -- it has a tendancy to offend them. So basically, it's like I have to adjust myself, and my words, to not offend them. It's almost like I can't be myself...