Alright, so my viewing of Attack Of The Clones got delayed by a night, but here we go.
I'll start with a broad criticism. I watched The People Vs George Lucas documentary as well as a recent interview Lucas did with Charlie Rose, and putting it all together, Lucas comes across as man who has, let's say, a complicated relationship with his own OT films. I think that, while he's proud of them, he may also be bored with them, and he may see them as something that, for all they gave him, took away the career he thought he was going to have. Remember, before SW, at the beginning, he was a more artsy kind of filmmaker, having made American Graffiti and THX, and he apparently was not fond of the corporate influence over the film industry. The phenomenal, generation-defining success of the OT kind of forced him to become the kind of big business film industry CEO he had never really wanted to be. He was just a CEO and a producer after that. He'd never be able to do anything in the film industry without being known as the Star Wars guy. He never directed another film that wasn't a SW film. As an addition to this observation - and it is only my observation - over the years, it has at times seemed like he's almost more proud of the filmmaking and special effects techniques that he pioneered while making the OT than he is of the story itself.
This is all a long way around of saying that, I think when he sat down to start writing the prequels in the 90s, he came at it from a very different place than fans would've. Fans loved the OT and the most important thing would've been staying true to it. I think that Lucas was bored by the OT and wanted to do something different even if it was tonally jarring from the OT, even if the continuity wasn't 100%. Lucas even said in that Charlie Rose interview that he didn't like TFA, and that Disney just wanted to make a film for the fans(he said this almost with a roll of the eyes) and that he, in contrast, had worked very hard to make each film different.
I think what he did with the prequels went beyond even that. I think that the OT was a high fantasy adventure, and not science fiction as it is often characterized. I think the OT has more in common with the Lord Of The Rings than it does with Star Trek. That kind of sci-fi(Star Trek) is characterized by speaking, through the politics of the fantasy world, about the politics of the real world. That's not what the OT did. In the OT, the Empire existed as a dictatorial government, and there was an emperor and Vader and their ships and a fleet of tie-fighters and at-ats and whatever, but the Empire as a governmental entity existed only abstractly. There was no insight into the inner workings of the dictatorship because that wasn't what the story was about. But when Lucas wrote the prequels, it seems like he very purposefully attempted to incorporate sci-fi elements in the form of fantasy political discourse, like he tried to do a little bit of Star Trek within Star Wars. And while I think some of it was well done and some of it not so well done, I've never been sure it really belonged in Star Wars. And I don't think that's what the OT fans who were hyped for the prequels wanted either. They just wanted more high fantasy adventure. That's one reason the prequels are so disliked among older OT fans, and it's never more prevalent than in Attack Of The Clones. So with that, I'll go into the film itself...
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We start out with the assassination attempt on Padme, who has arrived on Coruscant for an important and impending vote in the Senate over whether or not an army of the republic is to be created to combat the Separatists. If we have to go the political sci-fi route to tell this story, this is fine starting point to get the ball rolling. This is followed by the meeting in chambers where Palpatine suggests that some Jedi - perhaps Obi-Wan - be put on Padme for protection. Ok, plot point accomplished. Also in this scene, Jar-Jar is introduced again. Why? Everybody hated him, why bring him back? Will get back to this later.
Enter Obi-Wan and Anakin, who from his first minute on screen is obsessing over Padme. They meet Padme, have introductions, and then separate again while Padme goes to rest, Anakin all angsty that Padme didn't pay him enough attention. Right from the start, the love story is on shaky ground. Anakin comes off less as a young man in love and more an adolescent obsessed.
Another attempt on Padme's life is made while she is sleeping, and Obi-Wan and Anakin take off in pursuit of the assailant. Ok, this is my first major problem with the film. I don't like this flying car chase. Number one, in the OT, the Jedi are never made out to be superheroes. But in this chase, Obi-Wan and Anakin continually jump out of the car and just fly around impervious to all physics, going from the sky down the ground just like that. This isn't what the Jedi were supposed to be about. Number two, the other cars flying around, including the one coming towards them in which the driver shouts 'WHAT THE--'. This is more sci-fi stuff, flying cars in the future. It's out of place here. One of the charms of the OT was the space travel against a backdrop of worlds that looked more ancient than futuristic. The famous tagline is 'a long time ago in a galaxy far far away'. I don't really think anyone came to the prequels looking for a science fiction view of a futuristic world. And finally, number three, it just goes on too long. It felt like ten minutes. All for a chase in pursuit of a plot-point character that will never be heard from again after this and was never heard before this, that no one cares about, and thus there's no dramatic tension in this chase that goes on and on. It's only there to jump-start the twin Obi-Wan and Anakin plots. It serves no other purpose. And even then it wasn't needed. They could've just had Obi-Wan and Anakin thwart the second attempt on Padme, with the assailant flying away and dropping the coin that they get at the end of the chase. There, same plot point accomplished with ten minutes of a pointless chase cut.
As an aside, the flying car chase is also the moment you realize that, oh, this film is going to look like an animated film or a video game. One of the complaints about Jar-Jar in TPM was that it always looked like a cartoon invaded a live-action film. Here, it is in the inverse. The humans look out of place in an animated world throughout, no different really than if a human showed up in the middle of Toy Story or Shrek or something. I just read someone comparing TPM to the other prequels and saying something along the lines of, at least TPM still looks like a movie, AOTC and ROTS look like video games. This is also probably one of the things people liked about TFA, it was a SW film that looked like a movie again.
Alright, enough about that. After catching the assailant, he/she/it is taken out from above by another bounty hunter, and the only information Obi-Wan and Anakin have is a coin that was in the assailant's possession. Here the story splits. Obi-Wan begins his search for whoever is responsible for the attempts on Padme's life, and Anakin and Padme go away to Naboo for her protection.
Let's start with the latter and get it out of the way. The Naboo sequence where their relationship is supposed to blossom is one of the most notoriously maligned things in the whole prequel trilogy. And I can't blame those who malign it. The biggest problem is it's just too quick. Padme doesn't seem terribly interested in Anakin in their initial encounters on Coruscant - after all they hadn't seen each other in ten years - and then in the space of like four scenes on Naboo she's supposed to have gone from that to ostensibly being in love with him but not wanting to act on it because it would be wrong. It's just not believable. Add in the cutesy stuff(levitating fruit) and problematic dialogue(I mean, I get that 'I don't like sand' was supposed to be hinting at how it reminded him of Tatooine and how that is painful for him because of his guilt about leaving his mother behind, but it was executed very ham-fistedly. And that's just one example.) only detracted more.
It's worth noting that there are three deleted scenes from this portion of the film on the second disc, in which they have a longer conversation when they arrive on Naboo, visit Padme's family, and see Padme's bedroom. If these had replaced the levitating fruit scene and the 'I don't like sand' scene, a little more depth might have been given to love story. Even then it still wouldn't be believable.
Meanwhile, Obi-Wan discovers that the coin is from Kamino, and after a few scenes in which Kamino doesn't exist in the records and the Jedi Council realizes that a Jedi must have deleted it, Obi-Wan sets out. Upon arrival, he is surprised to learn that he's expected. In talking the alien prime minister, he learns that Master Sifo Dyas commissioned the creation of a clone army a decade before. Ok, another problem here. The whole Sifo Dyas thing is touched on but barely examined at all. No one watching the film would, at the end, have any idea who Sifo Dyas was outside of the fact that he was a Jedi, and one would have to read external materials to learn explicitly that the Sith killed Dyas and took control of the clone army unbeknownst to the Kaminoans. It just added unnecessary confusion. They could've just said the Chancellor commissioned the army in secret.
Obi-Wan sees the clones for himself. Problem again. I don't love the idea of clones at all, but I guess we were locked into that after the 'clone wars' were referenced in the OT. This clone army is obviously supposed to bear resemblance to the storm troopers, but the storm troopers were not clones. And I especially roll my eyes at the notion that a bounty hunter was the clone source.
I don't like the whole Jango Fett thing. Having him the film reeks of an attempt at superficially tying into the OT with his 'son' being Boba. The only purpose he serves is getting Obi-Wan from Kamino to Geonosis. Obi-Wan confronts Jango, Jango and Boba run, a ground battle ensues, the Fetts get away, and Obi-Wan follows them via tracker before evading them and waiting. That particular chase is not long, but I don't really enjoy it. I find child Boba to be highly annoying. Like, why is he so gleeful to kill Obi-Wan? What does he care at this point?
Ok, so now Obi-Wan is on Geonosis where he spies on Dooku and the other Separatist leaders and discovers the droid factory. When he attempts to report back to the Council, his transmitter is fried, and by the time he sends his message to Anakin, he's captured. At this point, the film is two-thirds over and Obi-Wan has spent most of his time playing detective. Probably not what people had in mind when a prequel trilogy telling the story of Anakin and Obi-Wan was announced.
Meanwhile, Anakin and Padme have gone to Tatooine to look for his mother after he had a bad dream about her. The Tatooine sequence is actually one of the parts of the film I have the least issue with, and that has the most emotional resonance for me. I said in my write-up for The Phantom Meance that I thought the idea of Anakin and his mother being slaves was an interesting way to plant the seeds of his later resentment and anger towards the system. I think this holds here. Once he finds out that Tusken Raiders have her, he finds her(a little too easily given everyone else was unable to). The moment when she says with her final breaths, dying in Anakin's arms, 'I'm so proud of you', 'I missed you so much', 'now I am complete', is one of the few genuinely emotionally resonant moments in the film for me, and I think Anakin's reaction when she dies is Hayden's best moment of acting in either of the films he's in.
He proceeds in his rage and grief to destroy all of the Tuskan Raiders. The dialogue when Anakin returns to the Lars home and talks to Padme has long been criticized, but I actually don't mind the first part of it, in which he tells here that he killed not only the men, but the women and children too, in a 'what have I done' kind of tone. It suggests the kind of inner struggle that could ultimately lead to succumbing to the dark side. The second part of the dialogue, in which he states his frustration that he can't control everything, and Padme tells him he's not all powerful, and he says he should be, is not good. It makes him come off as unhinged, and I feel like if Padme had previously been considering becoming involved with Anakin, that thought would have evaporated here.
One additional thing here, and this has been pointed out before - Owen and Beru, given their ages in ANH and the length of time between AOTC and ANH, are too young. It's nitpicking, but it does show a certain lack of regard for the OT on the part of the writers, one of which was George Lucas.
Anyway, once that's done, they return to their ship and receive Obi-Wan's message simultaneously with the Jedi Council back on Coruscant. Afterwards, at Padme's urging, they defy the Council's orders to stay put and go to Geonosis to rescue Obi-Wan.
When they get there, the droid factory scene unfolds. I really don't like this whole sequence. It's just dumb. They get into a battle in the middle of a bunch of machinery that puts droids together, Anakin trys to fight the droids off to save Padme for a while, while some painfully unfunny slapstick with C-3P0 unfolds, until they get caught. It's just not a good scene, and the only reason it exists is to get Anakin and Padme into the arena with Obi-Wan.
Ok, now at this point we go back to Coruscant briefly. I have a major problem here. Remember how I said I'd get back to Jar-Jar later? At this point, having been informed via Obi-Wan's spy mission about the goings-on on Geonosis, Palpatine manipulates Jar-Jar, who has been appointed, I guess, to temporarily be a senator in Padme's place, into motioning in the Senate to grant Palpatine emergency powers. Look, the notion that a galactic senator would trust Jar-Jar Binks to act in their place for even five seconds is preposterous and pushes the boundaries of credulity. Jar-Jar motions, all proudly and with his head held high, to make Palpatine a de facto dictator. Why?
What makes this worse is there is a great deleted scene where Padme herself addresses the Senate and passionately argues that to create any army is nothing less than a declaration of war. This was cut. So Padme doesn't get to make her argument early on but Jar-Jar gets to give Palpatine the power he wants. I just...we can argue about whether or not these films should've gone the political sci-fi route, but if that's the route Lucas took, do it right! Don't cut a good scene and then put Jar-Jar in a ridiculous role in this context.
Ok, ok, got that out. After this, Mace Windu sets out for Geonosis with backup and Yoda goes to Kamino to see the clone army for himself, and we return to the battle arena in Geonosis.
Anakin and Padme are being taken in when Padme declares her love to Anakin. I truly deeply love you. Etc. Based on what? They still barely know each other! I won't waste any more text here, suffice it to say the love story in this film is not believable.
So now they join Obi-Wan, and the film's one genuinely funny moment occurs when Anakin tells Obi-Wan that they came to rescue him, and Obi-Wan looks around at the situation and says 'good job'. And then the big battle starts.
Look, I've never really been a fan of this climactic battle. I think it's just too chaotic, too much going on, with not much in the way of emotional stakes. First these huge animals try to kill the trio but they manage to survive that by flipping around on the pillars and then choking them(ok, perhaps the one thing I do enjoy about this battle is the way Padme takes charge...I actually don't have much of an issue with the characterization of Padme in the first two prequels, she's strong and smart, it's just in ROTS where her character takes an unfortunate turn), and then the droids are sent out as Mace Windu arrives with Jedi backup. So now it's a million CGI Jedi we've never met fighting a million droids while C-3P0(who really didn't need to be in the film aside from maybe being present at the Lars house on Tatooine) is cracking bad jokes in a big battle that has no dramatic tension at all because everyone knows nothing is going to happen to Anakin or Obi-Wan or Padme here. It's just not that fun to watch for me.
Just as the droids are about to defeat the Jedi, Yoda arrives on ships with a bunch of clone troopers, and the trio escapes on the ships. It's not my aim to be quite so consistently negative, but I can't help it. While these ships are moving, Yoda starts barking out orders like a general. General Yoda doesn't really work for me. He was always a very cerebral character, dispensing wisdom and teaching the force as something that wasn't just physical, but spiritual. And now he's like a military leader? It doesn't jive.
Ok, so eventually Obi-Wan and Anakin confront Dooku in a cave. What ensues is possibly the most underwhelming lightsaber duel in any of the films. Dooku kicks both of their asses pretty quickly. And then Yoda comes in.
I remember, the first time I saw this in the theater in 2002, when Yoda took his lightsaber out, the crowd cheered. Including me. That was something that had never been seen and so it seemed cool in the moment. But over the years I've soured on it. It doesn't make any sense. Yoda was 900 years old when he died in ROTJ. That would make him 875 years old, or thereabouts, here. So at 900 he's a dying old man, but at 875, he's a spry fighter. It's those last 25 years that did him in. Come on. Even here, he's walking with a cane all the time but then all of sudden he can just throw it away and start flying around crouching tiger hidden dragon style? I can't buy it.
Ok, final few scenes, falling action. Dooku meets up with Sideous, revealing what we already knew, that Dooku is a Sith and that Palpatine is behind the Separatists. Ok. Whatver. Truthfully, I think Christopher Lee was a good actor who was wasted on this role. He barely did anything here and then he dies at the beginning of ROTS. Like Maul before him, he's another underdeveloped Sith apprentice.
Back on Coruscant, Yoda declares that begun, the clone wars have.
The film concludes on Naboo, where Anakin and Padme get married while a gorgeous score, more grand and soulful than their romance ever was, plays.
Ok, I realize that was a pretty negative write-up. I didn't go into it wanting to be so negative, I really didn't, but AOTC has always been my least favorite SW film and unless ROTS ends up being a lot worse than I remember, that's unlikely to change. I just don't care for the film.
It's a film of a plot machinations, scenes and sequences that exist to get the plot from point A to B to C, lacking in actual engaging action sequences(to me, the battle arena isn't engaging) and deficient in organic character development. I think much of that could've been avoided if they'd just started the film at the beginning of the clone wars instead of ending it there - just skip all of this and start when the war starts and have the film be a series of battles between the Separatists and the Republic. Maybe have the Jedi question their allegiance and switch sides at some point, particularly if they realize Palpatine is the Sith Lord. Make it that kind of a film. Anyway, I'm just fantasizing now.
Finally, as mentioned before, the film is also built on about as much CGI and animation as it could and still be called a live action film. Though I admit I wouldn't mind this quite so much if I liked the movie better.
Anyway, sorry to be so negative. At least I tried to go into detail about why I don't like it rather than mindlessly bitching about it.