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OOH facebook people! :)
My name is Priscilla Zelaya i go to the University of Florida! Go Gators! Add me!
 
Mom finds on Facebook son she gave up for adoption

CHARMAINE NORONHA
Associated Press

July 20, 2007 at 4:53 PM EDT

TORONTO — When Lori Haas joined Facebook, she didn't know much about the popular social networking site except that most of her friends were on it. Little did she know how life-changing the online tool would be.

After spending a year searching for the son she gave up for adoption 20 years ago in phone books, adoption registries and on the Internet to no avail, a friend suggested searching for him on Facebook.

“When my friend told me about the search tool and I typed in my son's name, Travis Sheppard, I couldn't believe it when I saw a photo of him,” she said.

The photo was a thumbnail shot of Mr. Sheppard wearing a hat and sunglasses and he was with a friend. Ms. Haas felt sure he was her son, but since it was difficult to clearly make out the picture, she was hesitant to send him a message. Then a week later, Mr. Sheppard changed his profile photo to a lone shot of himself.

“He was still wearing a hat, but I knew, I just knew that was him. My heart was racing when I saw the photo,” said the 37-year-old nurse from Vancouver. “We have the same long face and nose! And it was listed that he was in Vancouver. I couldn't believe it. I thought, 'Oh my god, he's been living here too?!”'

The 20-year-old Sheppard had moved to Vancouver only four months earlier in the hopes of locating his birth mother. He knew she had given him up for adoption in the suburb of Richmond when she was 17.

Haas worried about contacting Mr. Sheppard through Facebook since she didn't know if he knew he was adopted. She finally sent him a message saying she was looking for a relative and provided a birth date and name. He confirmed the details were his and sent her a message saying he thought she was his birth mother. The two decided to meet the following day.

“It was exciting and scary all at the same time,” said Mr. Sheppard. “I'd heard so many horror stories about adopted kids meeting their birth parents, so I went into our meeting expecting nothing, so I wouldn't get too hurt since I wanted to know for so long about my mother. But as soon as we hugged, I knew everything was OK.”

The connection between the two was instantaneous and they discovered they share similar characteristics and likes and dislikes.

“It was amazing how familiar it was meeting him and the feeling of being complete,” said Ms. Haas. “I carried around the pain and anxiety of giving him up for adoption at such a young age, but when I heard him say that he didn't hate me for doing that, a chapter of my life ended and a new one is beginning.”

Since that meeting two weeks ago, the two have spent almost every day together touring Vancouver's landmarks, as well as meeting Mr. Sheppard's birth father, his family and Ms. Haas' extended family.

“Everything's fallen into place so perfectly and, well, so easily because of Facebook,” said Ms. Haas. “This weekend Travis and his birth father and I were all together. It's been one of the happiest moments of my life.”

The reunited mother and son now have a profile photo showing them together on their Facebook pages. They plan to continue getting to know each other and to become a significant part of each other's life.

“I was about to delete my Facebook profile just a few days before I got the message from Lori,” said Mr. Sheppard. “I can't even imagine if I had done that. I'd still be looking for my birth mom, I wouldn't have decided to stay in Vancouver and I'd still be wondering about my roots.”
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Wow. I forgot I had posted my shit in here.

No wonder all these strange people are adding me. :wink:
 
I have a question -- I see everyone is giving out their real names. Do you have to know someone's real name to add them with Facebook? If not, what are the other means? Thanks! :)
 
indra said:
I have a question -- I see everyone is giving out their real names. Do you have to know someone's real name to add them with Facebook? If not, what are the other means? Thanks! :)
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that depends under which name you're registered!I'm registered under my real name, so if you want me to add you have to use the 'search' field and type in the name! or you can also search the network the person is belonging to...
 
mirrorballin said:
Yes this is great! I love me some facebook.

Airial Clark

UC Berkeley 07

Is anyone else in the "All Because of U2" group?
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I am....it looked like the only U2 group that had a decently sized membership.
 
http://www.theglobeandmail.com/servlet/story/RTGAM.20071108.wlfacebook08/BNStory/PersonalTech/home




Face it: You're a bully not a friend

When her childhood enemy tried to reconnect on Facebook Shannon McKinnon couldn't help herself - she called her rival fat and blocked her profile


SHANNON MCKINNON

Special to The Globe and Mail
November 8, 2007 at 6:34 AM EST


Oh, the times we had.

She locked me in the bathroom. She cornered me in the cloakroom. She choked me. She told me she was going to kill me. She invited me to a sleepover at her house - then told our class I'd "put the moves on her."

I wanted to kill myself every day of Grade 6.

So imagine my shock when, more than 20 years later, I logged on to Facebook last week and was notified that my former nemesis had requested that we be "friends."

Reconnecting us with ex-lovers, ex-neighbours and that guy we met at the movies 10 years ago, most people's Facebook networks have become a mix of people you know, people you hardly remember and people you barely knew in the first place.

Massive friend lists are the new social economy, and many of us are increasingly fielding friendship requests from ever more tenuous connections.

But some Facebook users are getting a blast from the past they remember all too well - and would rather forget: their childhood tormentor.

Genevieve's Poirer, a London, England, lawyer who grew up in Mississauga, couldn't believe her grade-school bully had the nerve to try to get back in touch with her.

"This is the chick who told me every day that I was a loser. She made fun of my clothes. She made fun of my hair. She spread nasty rumours about me and a boy in our class."

Convinced her former bully was indiscriminately trying to beef up the number of friends in her Facebook network by adding anyone she could think of, Ms. Poirier declined her bully's request.

She says it wasn't a tough decision.

"This person means nothing to me. I didn't feel sanctimonious and I didn't take any pleasure in refusing her request. I honestly don't care."

Others are more forgiving.

Carrie Mudd, a television executive in Toronto, shudders when she recalls her former antagonist.

"I remember once our whole class was standing at the top of a hill in the winter," Ms. Mudd says. "She started screaming at me, and the next thing I knew, everyone started throwing snowballs at my face. They had ice in them.

"She was like a cult leader - no one wanted to talk back to her or get on her bad side."

Yet, when her bully recently asked her to be Facebook friends, Ms. Mudd accepted.

Though her former tormentor didn't say so, Ms. Mudd thinks she may have wanted to relieve her guilt.

"I think secretly people are looking to emotionally whitewash their past," she says.

And just clicking "confirm" can feel like an absolution that you have the power to give.

Tyrone Newhook, a Toronto producer, not only accepted his class bully's friendship request - he says he would even have a drink with the guy.

Although he's sure they have nothing in common, Mr. Newhook says he's not the type to hold a grudge.

"Facebook friends aren't real friends anyway - just people you know," he says.

But warming up to your bully might not be the best idea, says Richard Rosenberg, a computer science professor at the University of British Columbia.

"People on Facebook seem to get some sort of pleasure in having this extended network of connections ... [but] you have to take into account the fact that you really don't know this person at all - and it was not a pleasant relationship when you did."

While he doesn't dismiss the notion that some bullies may be reaching out for forgiveness, he thinks that not responding should be the general rule of thumb.

"These connections can draw out a lot of feelings that are still close to the surface. It can be very destructive - all of a sudden you're 10 years old again."

Still, I checked out my former bully's profile: She still lives in our hometown. She went to hairdressing school there. She'd put on some weight. Her spelling was atrocious.

All I had to do was write a patronizing note wishing her all the best. Or I could give her the Facebook finger by declining her request.

But I couldn't help myself: Instead, I reminded her that we weren't exactly BFF's.

I mentioned the choking, the fear-mongering and the spreading of rumours. Then I signed off by telling her that she may be a great person these days - but I never had the pleasure of knowing that person, did I?

She sent me back a message within the hour. It was riddled with homophobic slurs (and spelling errors).

She said I look like a man. She called me a lezzie. She said that it wasn't her who made my life miserable back then, it was my shame.

That's when I called her fat.

Then I blocked her profile so she wouldn't be able to contact me again.

Within minutes, I received a message from a complete stranger, with the subject line "From (Your Bully)."

She wasn't finished: My husband was the "gay, wimpy type." She's 10 times better looking than me. I should go shove my life up my ass. I'm "a lonely soul" and she knows it and so do I.

She signed off by saying she felt sorry for me.

I bit. I insulted her looks, her intelligence and her education.

I burned every last shred of superiority to the ground, and it felt great for about five minutes. And then it felt like a waste of time. And then I felt like an idiot.

She got back to me. She said more of the same. This time I didn't reply.

I haven't heard anything since.
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