nbcrusader said:
The question of who we are attracted to raises a couple of interesting issues as they relate to the concept of choice. It would appear that anyone’s attraction to another individual is not a pure function of conscious choice (as are many of our functions or actions). But what is it? Is it the result of our environment and experiences, or is it part of our genetic makeup? Is there a way to measure between the two? Studies which try to show genetic links or biological causes produce inconsistent, non-predictable results. And we have never provided a way to measure results other than through self-declaration – which is by itself a flawed scientific method.
The next step is how we define our response to our attractions (the as of yet undefined impulses) – is that a choice?
all very interesting questions, perhaps desire and love are simply unable to be adequately addressed by the scientific method?
perhaps this is where we simply have to trust people at their word, that what they say really is what is.
it also tosses notions of what is or what is not "moral" or "natural" right out the window, which is a benefit of the scientific method.
i think there are some genetic factors for attraction -- generally speaking, there are some universal standards of what is considered "beautiful" that transcend cultures. facial symmetry, the appearance of health, things like this -- though we can all find exceptions to this rule (love his music, but i don't find Lyle Lovett attractive, yet some do even though he defies conventional standards of beauty) and these exceptions, that which we find quirky, might be rooted in experience and environment. we can learn to love the quirk, or to adapt the quirk to whatever genetically wired responses to notions of "beauty" we already possess.
the important thing to realize, however, is that it is involuntary, and it is the suppression of whatever attractions you do have that causes dysfunction and misery.
of course, the exception to this is for those unfortunate few who's attractions are illegal -- specifically, pedophiles. most pedophiles can't help their attraction, it is unchosen, and most wish they weren't attracted to children, but because there is a clear victim, there is a clear harm to such an attraction, society has made it illegal and we punish those who act upon their attractions because a child is unable to give consent and damage is done to the child.