Me: So guys, how's the new album coming along?
Adam: Really good, I think it's going to be ....
Bono: (cutting Adam off, for fear that he might reveal too much) It's going to be like chopping down the Joshua Tree.
Me: But don't you always say that?
Bono: It's a big Joshua Tree. It'll take lots of men with lots of axes to chop it down. So far it's only been the four of us.
Me: Just admit it. You have no idea what is going on.
Edge: Well he would if he were ever in the bloody studio!!
Bono: But Edge, I've got meetings with Oprah and George Bush!
Me: Hurry up and get it recorded. The music world is in terrible shape, and you'll once be needed again to kick it's arse in gear.
Adam: That's what I tried telling him. But have you heard of this new band called the Stinkboys?? They're alright.
Me: No, I haven't......anyway, how much work is left to do on the new album.
Edge: Well, we already picked the 12 songs for the album without Bono's help. We just need him to sing.
(So, over the next 12 hours, Bono accomplishes what he spent the past year avoiding.)
Adam: How can we ever thank you for helping us get our record out in time for those Christmas sales? Those really help.
Me: Can you guys come to Cincinnati on your next tour, please? You haven't played there since 1981. Everybody else plays there.
Edge: Ummm......we still have our dignity.....
So I went home after that. Those jerks.