Shuttlecock! Part VII - Harry Muffin and the Shuttler's Cock

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lazarus said:
United Colours of Badminton
Always Forever Cock (obvious, but effective)
Your Blue Racquet? Balls is confusing, since shuttlecocks are used?
Miss Serveajevo
Elvis Ate Cock--I think this was mentioned yesterday
Courts (These Cocks Are Way Too Long)--same here


Your "One Fault Warning"--brilliant
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I have no idea what I was thinking with Your Blue Balls. That makes no sense. Serveajevo is brilliant. EAC and Courts are both great. I really want to keep Always Forever Rally though. It just makes a lot of sense, considering it's an action that inherently repetitive.
 
LemonMelon said:
I have no idea what I was thinking with Your Blue Balls. That makes no sense. Serveajevo is brilliant. EAC and Courts are both great. I really want to keep Always Forever Rally though. It just makes a lot of sense, considering it's an action that inherently repetitive.
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Get your mind out of the fucking gutter, ass.

Always Forever Cock is a great contradiction to the YLB-dedicated Seconds.
 
impy13 said:
I got really dark and depressed, started listening to Radiohead and dabbling in KNIFE CRIME.



"You're gonna need a bigger roll."
Click to expand...

Did you go to a Top 5 UK University?

I know I've dropped that quote about 3 times tonight, but it still cracks me the fuck up.

phillyfan26 said:
KNIFE CRIME
Can't find my knife
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Why isn't "Twilight" in the MOVIE Twilight? That just blows my mind.
 
LemonMacPhisto said:
Did you go to a Top 5 UK University?

I know I've dropped that quote about 3 times tonight, but it still cracks me the fuck up.
Click to expand...

I think if I told him I'm at a Public Ivy, he might brighten up a little bit and not think I was going to stab him.


And that's when I'd stab him.
 
impy13 said:
I think if I told him I'm at a Public Ivy, he might brighten up a little bit and not think I was going to stab him.


And that's when I'd stab him.
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I'll have Myron Rolle accept his Rhodes Scholarship, ride on over to Oxford, and then stab him.
 
Seconds (for YLB)

Takes a second to spray goodbye
Spray goodbye, oh, oh, oh
It takes a second to spray goodbye
Spray goodbye, oh, oh, oh, spray, bye bye
Why you going home now
Powerjuice flashes across the sky
Left to right, arm or thigh
Like a thief on the block
Serve the world a shuttlecock

Fall, rise and...fall, rise and...come on, rise already!

In an theatre in Times Square
You can wank it anywhere
Held to climax, hell to clean
An ejaculation everyday
S&M, DVDA, Orlando, Florida, Shuttlecock3D
It's the lady friend, it's the lady friend
Who pull the zippers

Fall, rise and...fall, rise and...rise, damn you!

Spray goodbye, spray goodbye
Spray goodbye, spray goodbye
Spray goodbye

It takes a second to spray goodbye
Spray goodbye, oh, oh, oh

Push the prostate and pull the plug
Spray goodbye, oh, oh, oh

Fall, rise and...fall, rise and...please rise.

And they're doing the Lance's Mom
Do they know where the sore comes from?
Yes they're doing the Lance's Mom
They want you to pay along
Spray goodbye, spray goodbye
Spray goodbye
 
lazarus said:
Seconds (for YLB)

Takes a second to spray goodbye
Spray goodbye, oh, oh, oh
It takes a second to spray goodbye
Spray goodbye, oh, oh, oh, spray, bye bye
Why you going home now
Powerjuice flashes across the sky
Left to right, arm or thigh
Like a thief on the block
Serve the world a shuttlecock

Fall, rise and...fall, rise and...come on, rise already!

In an theatre in Times Square
You can wank it anywhere
Held to climax, hell to clean
An ejaculation everyday
S&M, DVDA, London, New York, Shuttlecock3D
It's the lady friend, it's the lady friend
Who pull the zippers

Fall, rise and...fall, rise and...rise, damn you!

Spray goodbye, spray goodbye
Spray goodbye, spray goodbye
Spray goodbye

It takes a second to spray goodbye
Spray goodbye, oh, oh, oh

Push the prostate and pull the plug
Spray goodbye, oh, oh, oh

Fall, rise and...fall, rise and...please rise.

And they're doing the Lance's Mom
Do they know where the sore comes from?
Yes they're doing the Lance's Mom
They want you to pay along
Spray goodbye, spray goodbye
Spray goodbye
Click to expand...

Someday I'll get you back, but for now, I'm soaking all of this in. Classic stuff.
 
lazarus said:
And they're doing the Lance's Mom
Do they know where the sore comes from?
Yes they're doing the Lance's Mom
They want you to pay along
Spray goodbye, spray goodbye
Spray goodbye
Click to expand...

I will never love anyone or anything as much as I love this.

phillyfan26 said:
Hey, Impy, you're a negative, immature, foul-mouthed Mama's Boy. Did you know?
Click to expand...

Yeah, I've heard that somewhere before.
 
LemonMacPhisto said:
It's a song from before 2006, why would it be?
Click to expand...

"Flightless Bird, American Mouth" was in it though, so I heard.

I am not looking forward to my next Iron & Wine show.


And to save you from trying, no I didn't see TWYLYTE!!!!
 
impy13 said:
Yeah, I've heard that somewhere before.
Click to expand...

Ha, you misspelled something/edited a post! You must be ignorant! Ha! Look everyone, he's proving my point with his ignorance! Go ask your mom something, little ignorant boy!
 
No spoken words said:
One of those songs is Native Cock, which I'd not listened to in quite a while. For fuck's sake, it blows Squirtigo right out of the water. In case you have not noticed, I rarely have anything truly negative to say about Shuttlecock; that's just the way it is...but the influence (Muffin Jr.? Steve Lillycock?) that lead them to swap out Native Cock for Squirtigo rankles just a little....and, I even like Squirtigo for what it is, especially Live....but Native Cock fucking rocks.

That is all.
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For some reason I hadn't paid much attention to this tune until now. I like it quite a bit too. In a number of these alternate versions you can hear why Boner actually called it "punk rock from Venus" or whatever ridiculous claim he had early on, as the songs actually "rock". Why they raped all of them in production, I don't know.

impy13 said:
http://www.u2interference.com/forums/f293/fantastic-4-looks-like-shit-132910.html

BOO YA
Click to expand...

I miss AvsGirl posting here, she is quality.
 
phillyfan26 said:
Ha, you misspelled something/edited a post! You must be ignorant! Ha! Look everyone, he's proving my point with his ignorance! Go ask your mom something, little ignorant boy!
Click to expand...

The funniest thing to me still is my insisting post counts and seniority don't matter, but he kept trying to use it against me.

Regardless, him and I get along pretty well now.
 
So, to summarize:

Ball Boy

1. I Will Return
2. KNIFE CRIME
3. An Cock Dubh
4. Into the Net
5. Out of the Court
6. Stories for Ball Boys
7. The Birdie
8. A Day Without Cock
9. Another Cock, Another Face
10. The Electric Cock
11. Shadows and Stabbings

The Unforgettable Liar

1. A Sort Of Cock Coming
2. Pride (In The Name Of Cock)
3. Racquet Wire
4. The Unforgettable Liar
5. Powerjuice
6. Cocks of July
7. Bad(minton)
8. Indian Summer Cocks
9. David Freeman and America
10. MLKock

The Joshua Cock

1. Where the Cocks Have No Game
2. I Still Haven't Found The Cock I'm Looking For
3. With Or Without Cock
4. Birdie The Blue Sky
5. Shuttling To Stand Still
6. Red Cock Mining Town
7. In God's Cock-Tree
8. Trip Through Your Nets
9. One Cock Hill
10. Evacuate (In The Hands Of Cock)
11. Cocks Of The Disappeared

Shuttle And Bum

1. Helter Server
2. Van Diemen's Cock
3. Desire Cock
4. Cockmoon 269
5. All Along the Ref Tower
6. Freedom For My Cock
7. Shriveled and Cold
8. Angel of Hardcourt
9. Love Racquet Me
10. Hardland
11. Cock Part II
12. The Star-Spangled Cock
13. All I Want Is Cock

Achtung, Birdie

1. Cock Station
2. Even Better than the Real Cock
3. One Birdie
4. Until the End of the Match
5. Who's Gonna Ride Your Wild Cocks?
6. So Cocky
7. The Bird
8. Mysterious Plays
9. Tryin' to Serve Your Cock Over the Net
10. Ultraracket (Serve My Way)
11. Cockrobat
12. Love is Badminton

Cockropa

1. Cockropa
2. Babycock
3. Numbcock
4. Cockawwwnnnnn
5. Serve (Faraway, So Close!)
6. Daddy's Gonna Pay for Your Crushed Cock
7. Some Shots Are Better Than Others
8. The First Set
9. Dirty Play
10. The Cockerer

Cockengers: Original Badminton Tournaments 1

1. United Colours Of Badminton
2. Sluggish Serve
3. Your Blue Racquet
4. Always Forever Rally
5. A Different Kind Of Slice
6. Service Sequence
7. Miss Serveajevo
8. Ito Okocki
9. One Fault Warning
10. Courts (These Cocks Are Way Too Long)
11. Elvis Ate Cock
12. Cock 180 (Theme From Lance's Mom)
13. Theme From The Serve
14. Theme From Cocks Go Native

Poppycock

1. Discocock
2. Do You Feel Cock
3. Mo'cock
4. If God Will Serve His Shuttles
5. Staring at the Cock
6. Last Night on Clay
7. Cock (Not Coming Down)
8. My Racquet
9. The Playbird Mansion
10. If You Serve That Velvet Cock
11. Cock, Please
12. Wake Up Line Judge

All That You Can't Leave Courtside

1. Beautiful Shot
2. Stuck in a Rally You Can't Get Out Of
3. (You Elevate My) Cock
4. Serve On
5. Kike (for NSW)
6. In a Little Cock
7. Wild Birdie
8. Cock on Earth
9. When I Look at the Serve
10. New Cock
11. Ace

How to Manhandle an Atomic Serve

1. Squirtigo
2. Miracle Shot
3. Sometimes You Can't Serve It on Your Own
4. Love and Peace or Cock
5. City of Winding Serves
6. All Because of Cock
7. A Cock and a Woman
8. Crumbs from Your Cock
9. One Step Closer to the Net
10. Original of the Birdies
11. Cockweh
 
Well, we need Cocktober and Cock-o-War, but I'm liking what I'm seeing. Liking it a lot.

Scumby, I'm about to grab my brand new can of Cope and commit some virtual KNIFE CRIME. Feel free to join.
 
LemonMelon said:
7. Shriveled and Cold
Click to expand...

Not to toot my own horn, but I thought this was going to go over better.


LemonMelon said:
Cockropa

1. Cockropa
2. Babycock
3. Numbcock
4. Cockawwwnnnnn
5. Serve (Faraway, So Close!)
6. Daddy's Gonna Pay for Your Crushed Cock
7. Some Shots Are Better Than Others
8. The First Set
9. Dirty Play
10. The Cockerer
Click to expand...

These need some work. I'd suggest Some Plays Are Better Than Others, it's closer to the original. Also, we can't improve #4 and #10? The Wandering Cock?

LemonMelon said:
Poppycock

6. Last Night on Clay
7. Cock (Not Coming Down)
Click to expand...

I'd go with Last Night on Turf, for obvious reasons. And I'm reticent to use simply "Cock" for anything. How about "Grown"?

LemonMelon said:
All That You Can't Leave Courtside
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Same thing here. Why not just "Erection"?
 
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