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Old 08-21-2001, 12:29 AM   #1
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being shy sucks

I hate being so shy. I don't know if it's just self-doubt, but I can't meet new people. I grew up way too fast, I'm ages above my friends in maturity(not as in goofiness). But I'm really lonely. I have few friends, all of whom are growing apart. No girl ever takes an interest in me, so I'm stuck agonizing over old lost ones. To quote Liam gallagher, "How many special people change?" Seriously. It's not just something that's come up and goes away, like everyone says things do at my age. It's been eating at me for the better part of two years. Bah. I'm gonna go jump on my trampoline, despite the fact that it's 12:30 in the morning and school starts in less than 2 days. Peace.

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Old 08-21-2001, 01:10 AM   #2
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Awww, sounds like you're having a crummy night Jason.

(((({{{{ }}}}))))

I know what you mean about being shy and too mature, I was both of those when I was your age. I guess I'm still kinda shy when it comes to meeting people one on one, but I have no problem giving a speech to an audience of 500 people. And when you get older, then being mature is what everyone expects so it's okay.

School in two days, uh? Me too. Actually, I should be finishing my syllabus right now, but here I am....

Actually, I'm not the best at these "it'll be okay" posts....where's Trash Can or 80's or martha when you need 'em?...but I did want to tell you you're not alone in feeling bad. I have before and it got better. I will again and God willing, it'll get better.

Okay, someone with a little more expertise in this area, step up to the plate.



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Old 08-21-2001, 01:11 AM   #3
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that was suppose to look like a lemon getting a hug, I don't think it worked, but you get the idea, right?



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Old 08-21-2001, 01:14 AM   #4
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Stop putting yourself down already!

I have a trampoline too ! It's great excersize.





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Old 08-21-2001, 01:22 AM   #5
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I've done this all before, and I'm sorry to bother you again. Thanks Sicy, and Like O2.
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Old 08-21-2001, 01:29 AM   #6
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You know Sicy loves you Lemon...(NO lap dances Sicy, Jason is too young!!)...she just wants you to not beat yourself up. Kinda like what I said about the "stupid" comment on your web page.

I'm babbling again....

Ya know what I'm talking about? We love ya and we want you to love you too.....

Okay, I'm shutting up now.

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Old 08-21-2001, 06:12 AM   #7
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Aww, sweetie, I am horribly lonely too. *hug*

My fiance lives 650 miles away (I've actually been crying since I woke up because I miss him so terribly), and I moved a little over a year ago from my hometown where I lived for over 18 years. I feel like I've lost my friends there, and I haven't made new ones here yet.

My parents keep telling me it will get better...

I'm still waiting...




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Old 08-21-2001, 10:10 AM   #8
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Being shy can be a good thing. I have a tendency to be shy with new people and it can be an opportunity to observe people. I'm also not much of a people person (in real life anyway; the anonymity of the internet is a whole other story).

UL, accept that you are shy. It doesn't suck; it lets you watch and learn about other people. You can find out a lot about others by watching them when they think you aren't watching. These powers of observation will help you when you start your teacher training.

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Old 08-22-2001, 12:22 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally posted by martha:
Being shy can be a good thing. I have a tendency to be shy with new people and it can be an opportunity to observe people. I'm also not much of a people person (in real life anyway; the anonymity of the internet is a whole other story).

UL, accept that you are shy. It doesn't suck; it lets you watch and learn about other people. You can find out a lot about others by watching them when they think you aren't watching. These powers of observation will help you when you start your teacher training.

ya man, martha is right! I'm shy as hell(in person, on the internet its a whole different story). I think it's great being shy, I mean i get to see how full of shit some ppl really are before i start talking. TRust me it's great, let ppl think what they want to think and then blow them away with your knowledge(i know your smart becuase your a u2 fan..and you have the same name as me)

as for that "past love" thing...that sucks ass, i know what you mean about that. I've gotten shot down a few times but the girl still wanted to be friends, i mean...what the HELL is that!!!...AND THEN SHE ASKED ME TO A DANCE THE WEEK AFTER!!!....and then she was changing schools and asked me if she should and i said no...and then she changes anyways and sais she doesn't want to talk to me anymore becuse it would be to hard!...TO HARD FOR WHAT!!!

sorry about that, i got carried away
just feel better man..remember ppl are always more full of shit than they seem


Quote:

posted by; Bonochick

Aww, sweetie, I am horribly lonely too. *hug*
My fiance lives 650 miles away (I've actually been crying since I woke up because I miss him so terribly), and I moved a little over a year ago from my hometown where I lived for over 18 years. I feel like I've lost my friends there, and I haven't made new ones here yet.

My parents keep telling me it will get better...

I'm still waiting...



that sucks....i feel really bad for you, you almost made me cry when you were talking about cring all morning.
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Old 08-22-2001, 12:33 PM   #10
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Dude (to use today's youth's vernacular ):

I went to your website. If that's a picture of your head as the knight, then shut it! LOL! You are blond, good-looking and young. In this world, that automatically makes you Mr. Popular. O.K., so women haven't swooned over you yet...not a problem. Both you and the women around you are young. Wait a few years from now and see if you say the same thing.

And as for meeting new people, I don't see the problem at all. In this boardroom you are clearly very intelligent and articulate. It may sound like a cliche, but just be yourself when you meet someone new. Don't try to overimpress but don't slack yourself off too much either. Just be the person we see here and I think you'll do great.

Have a great year in school!

[This message has been edited by doctorwho (edited 08-22-2001).]
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Old 08-22-2001, 11:07 PM   #11
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I'm the same way as UnfLemon and martha.. having to "warm up" to people before I'm open and "chummy". I don't usually think of it as a blessing though, because what ends up happening is I never talk to anyone and they never talk to me, so I don't meet too many new people.
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Old 08-24-2001, 01:23 PM   #12
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I was/am excrutiatingly shy, but being in the working world has forced me to be more outgoing. That's the great thing about these sites, being able to meet people and come out of your shell....

I was totally invisible in high school. Never even had a boyfriend until I was 19. Sometimes you just have to wait it out...
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Old 08-24-2001, 10:59 PM   #13
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lemon, dear, i totally sympathize. i am shy and being shy sucks! but, i don't really stress about it. it used to bother me when i started high school, but finding myself going into senior year, it doesn't bother me as much. i usually find it hard to think of something to say around people i don't know, but i figure they don't try to talk to me, either, then they are not worth my time. i, too, am invisible in high school. *crosses fingers and hopes college is better* anyway, lemon, you are not alone!

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Old 08-30-2001, 10:13 AM   #14
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Lemon,
I haven't really been in here much but I read your post and had to respond.
Sometimes I think it would be nice to be a dignified, shy person. It's better than being a motormouth and feel like you are pushing people away from you all the time. I make NO sense do I? *sigh* Ok, I will back up the truck. (beep, beep, beep)
I classified myself as shy in high school. I never talked to anyone. Turns out I just didn't like any of the people in high school. Ok, scratch that.
A lot of the people that you may look at and think "Wow, they are really outgoing and sociable" are actually (and I'm sharing and "outgoing person trade secret" with you here so don't tell anyone you got it from me) --- shy. For example, if you are really afraid of people and really scared that they will make fun of you, think you are full of crap or just not ever notice you (and I use the word "you" in the plural, universal sense) there are 2 basic ways to react.
One can withdraw from the situation and be "shy", or one can beat people to the punchline. In short, what seems outgoing is really a just defense mechanism against the same things that make you feel shy. The difference between most outgoing people and most shy people is not very signifigant.
Or I could be full of shit.

Hope my rambling helped and LISTEN TO DR. WHO!!!!!!!!
Bluey.

[This message has been edited by blueeyes (edited 08-30-2001).]
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Old 08-30-2001, 11:57 PM   #15
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hey Jason, yes being shy sucks but even if the knowledge doesn't help you, most people (all those who have the ability to think situations through, that is) are shy. it's about learning to swallow your doubts and just going and doing it.
believe it or not, something that really helps me, (and believe me, I am terrified in situations where I have to face new people I will be dealing with again) is thinking of U2. totally weird, I know but what else would a U2 fanatic do? I just think of Bono and how he goes out and does what he wants and doesn't care what the hell the world thinks. and then I'm like "ok, chin up, if he can do it, you can do it, and you know, you only live once so go get it overwith, Nikki"
it really helps even if it doesn't eliminate the fear. and probably in time, as you deal with it more it will fade into the background.
and about being lonely, everyone's lonely. seriously. all people want is to have someone to love and if you just think about that things start to come into clearer focus and people's actions make more sense. and eventually you branch out and find people you enjoy being with.
well, anyway, good luck, hope it gets better! and remember, you're not alone with those feelings

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