*clearing of apey throat* I shall attempt to be rude now.
You @ssbag! S|aney, dammit, it's your fault I'm failing out of Ape University! You worthless human, it's your fault Grams Magee died! You are furthermore responsible for my family problems-- my drug-addicted apey brother, my high strung apey sister, and my crazier-than-bedbugs apey parents!!!
My self-destructive tendencies? They are your fault, you stinking douchebag of masochism. Feckshite, S|aney, why can't you get your goddamn act together and write my apey paper for me, you slothful fertilizer factory!??
You aren't worth the banana bolus winding its way through my ancient, shriveled gastrointestinal tract! you are but an assbooger! Finally, and then I shall leave you to wallow in your own crapulence, as your evil cartoon cohort Monty Burns would say, all of the following are your fault: my depleted savings account, global warming, and my alcoholism, you glotant pisshanky!
And those godforsaken runon sentences, you impotent sh!tridden bitch.
*banana of venting my apey frustrations*