All of Alan Jamison's 'Stories' Here - U2 Feedback

Go Back   U2 Feedback > Lypton Village > Lemonade Stand
Click Here to Login
Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
 
Old 10-06-2014, 06:33 AM   #1
Rock n' Roll Doggie
FOB
 
Kieran McConville's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Auto Dafoe
Posts: 9,600
Local Time: 01:07 PM
All of Alan Jamison's 'Stories' Here

Alan Jamison (born Vyktor Ivanovich Strblzki, 1954) was a popular interference poster and band leader. Not a popular band leader. That needs an Oxford comma.

Alan Jamison, also known in some circles as 'Agent of Interest #2343', began his promising interference posting career in 1985, attempting to sow seeds of discord on the usenet group of the same name. He was unsuccessful.

After founding (some might say finding) a band, 'The Pricks' (see also 'The Fukkahs', 'The Military'), Jamison retired to a monastery for twelve years and then retired further to a lone column in the Sinai desert to practice the ways of a stylite. Again, without success. Jamison found the cold winter nights and complete lack of sustenance to be a strain unsupportable by man.

As did the financial backers of his flop 2014 single 'Everything Is Shit Except The Guy I'm Paying To Take Out Ballpark Music'.

Alan Jamison is today the social media manager for 'Hangry Moments' beef jerky (campaign of company that manufactures same), citation needed.
__________________

__________________
Kieran McConville is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-06-2014, 07:16 AM   #2
Rock n' Roll Doggie
ALL ACCESS
 
Mrs. Garrison's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: pig farming in Bolivia
Posts: 7,216
Local Time: 09:07 PM
I'm not buying this story. I recently received a strange package from a cabin in New Hampshire. Mostly just some empty beverage cans and a poorly written note on the back of an old newspaper, inviting me to join some random pyramid scheme. Im pretty sure that was Jamison, i recognize that handwriting anywhere. I still have his autographed toilet paper framed over my catbox.
__________________

__________________
Mrs. Garrison is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-06-2014, 09:12 AM   #3
Rock n' Roll Doggie
FOB
 
Kieran McConville's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Auto Dafoe
Posts: 9,600
Local Time: 01:07 PM
Jamison was being 'debriefed' in a cabin in New Hampshire prior to taking up employment as the social media manager for Hangry Beef Jerky
__________________
Kieran McConville is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-06-2014, 09:13 AM   #4
Rock n' Roll Doggie
FOB
 
Kieran McConville's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Auto Dafoe
Posts: 9,600
Local Time: 01:07 PM
Incidentally, the only thing the social media manager for Hangry Beef Jerky does is click on the ads in Clickhole and press 'like' on his own updates. Over and over again.
__________________
Kieran McConville is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-06-2014, 10:08 AM   #5
Rock n' Roll Doggie
ALL ACCESS
 
Mrs. Garrison's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: pig farming in Bolivia
Posts: 7,216
Local Time: 09:07 PM
Who is this Ballpark Franks gentleman that keeps calling me and hanging up? I'm not familiar with this guy...is he one of the Jamison gang?
__________________
Mrs. Garrison is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-06-2014, 06:04 PM   #6
Rock n' Roll Doggie
FOB
 
Kieran McConville's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Auto Dafoe
Posts: 9,600
Local Time: 01:07 PM
He's an agent with Mossad.
__________________
Kieran McConville is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-06-2014, 07:10 PM   #7
Rock n' Roll Doggie
ALL ACCESS
 
Mrs. Garrison's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: pig farming in Bolivia
Posts: 7,216
Local Time: 09:07 PM
Oh. Well i probably shouldn't have written that "story" about the backpack on the train.
__________________
Mrs. Garrison is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-06-2014, 07:15 PM   #8
Rock n' Roll Doggie
FOB
 
Kieran McConville's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Auto Dafoe
Posts: 9,600
Local Time: 01:07 PM
That wasn't a real story? I thought it all happened exactly as recounted.
__________________
Kieran McConville is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-06-2014, 07:25 PM   #9
Rock n' Roll Doggie
ALL ACCESS
 
Mrs. Garrison's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: pig farming in Bolivia
Posts: 7,216
Local Time: 09:07 PM
My memory isn't what it used to be with the blackouts and all. But yeah, thats pretty much what went down.
__________________
Mrs. Garrison is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-06-2014, 10:50 PM   #10
Rock n' Roll Doggie
FOB
 
Kieran McConville's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Auto Dafoe
Posts: 9,600
Local Time: 01:07 PM
Alan Jamison Tells Office He Was 'Just Kidding' After Police Order Lockdown of Hangry Beef Jerky Headquarters Owing to Social Media Manager Coming To Work in Strap-on Bomb
__________________
Kieran McConville is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2014, 05:07 AM   #11
Rock n' Roll Doggie
FOB
 
Kieran McConville's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Auto Dafoe
Posts: 9,600
Local Time: 01:07 PM
"Mmmm, skyscraper... I love you," smirks Alan Jamison before adjusting his bowtie, picking up his briefcase and crossing the sun bleached quadrangle of Hangry Beef Jerky 'campus', where everything and anyone happens.
__________________
Kieran McConville is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-10-2014, 11:19 AM   #12
Rock n' Roll Doggie
ALL ACCESS
 
Mrs. Garrison's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: pig farming in Bolivia
Posts: 7,216
Local Time: 09:07 PM
Remote New Hampshire cabin raided by FBI after anonymous tip

BREAKING Law Enforcement officials converge upon isolated mountain cabin

Updated: Sources find possible bomb making material, surplus of Twinkies and Mt Dew beverage cans, two turntables and a microphone.
__________________
Mrs. Garrison is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-10-2014, 07:22 PM   #13
Rock n' Roll Doggie
FOB
 
Kieran McConville's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Auto Dafoe
Posts: 9,600
Local Time: 01:07 PM
Unabomber gonna set the whole world on fiyah


Just a housekeeping note guys, I'm actually Sting 2.
__________________
Kieran McConville is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-11-2014, 10:29 AM   #14
Rock n' Roll Doggie
ALL ACCESS
 
Mrs. Garrison's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: pig farming in Bolivia
Posts: 7,216
Local Time: 09:07 PM
Jamison celebrates his record breaking 150,000 post at band website with a rant supporting the Nazi movement, curses followers for being "blind sheep", and trolls super-threads with an all out posting blitz flaming long time supporters with rapid-fire bursts.

Jamison later apologizes to fan community, likens odd behavior to being on a bad meth binge.

Spokesman for the guru / sometimes band leader unavailable for comment.
__________________
Mrs. Garrison is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-11-2014, 06:44 PM   #15
Rock n' Roll Doggie
FOB
 
Kieran McConville's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Auto Dafoe
Posts: 9,600
Local Time: 01:07 PM
Wake up sheeple!!!!#@
__________________

__________________
Kieran McConville is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 10:07 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Design, images and all things inclusive copyright © Interference.com