I have to vent. I just HAVE to vent.
Mods, I know you're going to read this post and will want to remove it. But please don't. This is a post more in the line of "I just HAVE to let it out"--I've had to deal with a hellish situation the past month and BELIEVE ME I will never post anything like this again. So don't be offended--and right now I'm so depressed I don't care.
I've been a good citizen the past few weeks in here and I don't want to ruin this now. So please excuse me while I cry over my keyboard...and please be kind.
It has been one thing after the other for the past 2 months with my family. Thank God I had Harry Potter for a while in July to take me out of my world . But that's all over now. My grandmother just had a colonsotrophy...she's had to deal with the aftermath of Colon cancer and she can barely pay her bills. Now the septic system went in her home, which is on a lake, and it required thousands of dollars in repeairs--it wasn't the tank, but the wholesystem..their house is almost 60 yrs old and never needed work previously. My uncle practically lives with her and had to help. I had to help too, as my cousin only works part time and can barely keep himself afloat. My aunt, my only other relative, is out of the country (she works for a small NGO) and won't be back until September--she is in Kenya and way out in the bush, she is uncontactable.
I have had to help and help and have bareky been able to keep myself afloat. Now I am about to be thrown out of my apt. My parents are both dead, and I have nowhere to go. I have one sister but she is sick, I will not discuss this. Oh sure, I can stay on a friend's couch for a few nights, but where after that? I have propably the cheapest place in the area, I've been looking. But even if I find a place in a shelter for a while, I have no money to store my furniture and things. I can't even afford the money it will take for a truck to haul my stuff. Where will I send it? Back to grandma's? It won't fit there....and anyway I can't go back there.
Suffice it to say that I have done everything in my power to try to get hold of the money I will need to keep myself with a roof over my head. You'll say that "they can't throw me out now, there are laws" etc, but now or the end of the month or 30 days, it makes no difference. Owing to family struggles and financial difficulties in the wake of my mother's suicide last year, I won't be able to come up with the money, so an order now is the same as 10 days from now, and 30 days makes little difference. I certainly can't aford a lawyer if I am urged to go to court, And why? For a couple hundred lousy dollars?
You name it, I have done it....DSS, Catholic charities, friends, attempts at loans, nothing to sell, no possible help from my job,whatever you can suggest, I have done. My little family is powerless, and no one has anyhting for me to borrow. It is all over. I can't struggle anymore.
So here I am, at 2:30 in the morning, sitting at my laptop, typing and trying not to cry again...I have done enough of that. It's all over. The clock is ticking. Tomorrow there will likely be a Notice placed on my door, Friday was the last day of my extension. I'm trying to think not about paking boxes, where will I go?
I told you this might be a "controversial" post. PLEASE don't take it down. I'm sitting here at my computer, trying not to think of the future. Putting this in a "Big Hug" thread would pollute it....and I just had to have even a kind word from someone. I feel so alone.
Like I said, I'm known more as the Harry Potter fan.....I never thought I'd be going through this. Please don't get mad at me or angry. Please be kind.
Mods, I know you're going to read this post and will want to remove it. But please don't. This is a post more in the line of "I just HAVE to let it out"--I've had to deal with a hellish situation the past month and BELIEVE ME I will never post anything like this again. So don't be offended--and right now I'm so depressed I don't care.
I've been a good citizen the past few weeks in here and I don't want to ruin this now. So please excuse me while I cry over my keyboard...and please be kind.
It has been one thing after the other for the past 2 months with my family. Thank God I had Harry Potter for a while in July to take me out of my world . But that's all over now. My grandmother just had a colonsotrophy...she's had to deal with the aftermath of Colon cancer and she can barely pay her bills. Now the septic system went in her home, which is on a lake, and it required thousands of dollars in repeairs--it wasn't the tank, but the wholesystem..their house is almost 60 yrs old and never needed work previously. My uncle practically lives with her and had to help. I had to help too, as my cousin only works part time and can barely keep himself afloat. My aunt, my only other relative, is out of the country (she works for a small NGO) and won't be back until September--she is in Kenya and way out in the bush, she is uncontactable.
I have had to help and help and have bareky been able to keep myself afloat. Now I am about to be thrown out of my apt. My parents are both dead, and I have nowhere to go. I have one sister but she is sick, I will not discuss this. Oh sure, I can stay on a friend's couch for a few nights, but where after that? I have propably the cheapest place in the area, I've been looking. But even if I find a place in a shelter for a while, I have no money to store my furniture and things. I can't even afford the money it will take for a truck to haul my stuff. Where will I send it? Back to grandma's? It won't fit there....and anyway I can't go back there.
Suffice it to say that I have done everything in my power to try to get hold of the money I will need to keep myself with a roof over my head. You'll say that "they can't throw me out now, there are laws" etc, but now or the end of the month or 30 days, it makes no difference. Owing to family struggles and financial difficulties in the wake of my mother's suicide last year, I won't be able to come up with the money, so an order now is the same as 10 days from now, and 30 days makes little difference. I certainly can't aford a lawyer if I am urged to go to court, And why? For a couple hundred lousy dollars?
You name it, I have done it....DSS, Catholic charities, friends, attempts at loans, nothing to sell, no possible help from my job,whatever you can suggest, I have done. My little family is powerless, and no one has anyhting for me to borrow. It is all over. I can't struggle anymore.
So here I am, at 2:30 in the morning, sitting at my laptop, typing and trying not to cry again...I have done enough of that. It's all over. The clock is ticking. Tomorrow there will likely be a Notice placed on my door, Friday was the last day of my extension. I'm trying to think not about paking boxes, where will I go?
I told you this might be a "controversial" post. PLEASE don't take it down. I'm sitting here at my computer, trying not to think of the future. Putting this in a "Big Hug" thread would pollute it....and I just had to have even a kind word from someone. I feel so alone.
Like I said, I'm known more as the Harry Potter fan.....I never thought I'd be going through this. Please don't get mad at me or angry. Please be kind.
