Average NJ/Anaheim playoff game:
Opening faceoff
No, the faceoff doesn't happen...player gets tossed.
Try again...someone, I think, wins the draw...and it's dumped in..
It's shot the length of the ice. Icing.
Oh, NJ wins the draw in the offensive zone!!! Oh, oh, the Ducks get it...and it's shot the length of the ice. Another icing.
Some time later...(we don't know if it's minutes, days, weeks, or months, it really doesn't matter in the end, or so they tell us)...NJ under a little bit of pressure again, oh, they chip the puck out just so it stops before the opposite goal line to avoid icing.
They do that again and again for several minutes...wow, they've made the "no whistle icing" an art form...how can one not appreciate this?
At about the half way point in the game (is it already half over???), it seems as though a 3 on 2 is developing...surely this is something to behold...and...well...no. They forgot what to do on a 3 on 2...but that's okay, because odd man rushes should never happen in the playoffs anyway.
Someone gets a make up penalty call...and Harry Neale laments on what the ref decided to smoke this time: "I've seen more of a hook on some fishing rods," he says, and we realize, for perhaps the first time, that we are being severely duped (though we're not certain if it's by Harry Neale or the NHL).
Some time later something curious happens...for a breaf moment there appears to be 3 strides of skating room inside the neutral zone...upon first glance, I almost can't believe it myself, but...1, 2, 3, 4...yes! only 4 players in the neutral zone! Where is everybody??? This is surely not right....oh my, look! The player is rushing with the bloody puck! He's skating and he has possession! Of the puck! As I watch this curious sight, I begin to realize I was having a flashback to the 94 finals...and then I realize this isn't the Canucks or the Rangers...and it all comes to an earth shattering end once I refocus on the screen and see, you guessed it, five more turnovers in the neutral zone....
But never fear! There are new things in store (well, new in an old kind of way)...back to the regular icings again...10 whistles in 5 seconds...a new record....this is exciting, another record falls....
Wait, what's this? A NJ Devil has a minor breakaway...everyone, including Giguere, is in shock....he stays on the goal line and closes his eyes. It's in the top corner...nice shot...wow, these guys actually have some skill...why don't they try using it more often? Oh, who am I kidding! We are being treated to a 3 month clinic on fine defensive hockey...yes...and this is something I'm sure the true fan can appreciate...
Some time passes...and things happen (or so I must assume)...
Oh, look the game is over...and apparently 2 more goals were scored...but I missed them in all the excitement...
Watches highlights on sportsnet to see what we all missed...oh, Brodeur, what were you thinking??? That's got to be the weirdest goal ever, but no one saw it cause they were asleep or just weren't watching!
This is the average Devils/Ducks game...and we have the coaches and officials of today's NHL to thank for it. Thank-you and goodnight.
If it was Vancouver playing the trap - you would be RAVING about it.
And unlike Kournikova, Finch can actually play her sport. 
there is an NCAA World Series for Softball. i'd rather watch bowling over that.
80's fashion and Saved by the Bell
They are back in though! Or were last fall. I bought myself a plain black pair, but they have definitely gone down in quality--they had holes within a few weeks. 
