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There is a fine-looking she-ape in my new retirement community. I would like to ask her to travel the world with me, aboard my raft. All I can offer is my heart, the raft, some bananas, and occasional use of my barcalounger. My simple question is, how should I approach her? My heart was recently...

Though I have been absent for many long months, I do in fact consider myself a PLEBAn. My favourite band member is Bono, as he is the one who employed me as a helper ape and taught me to use the internet. That said and out of the way, I should like to ask you all for a bit of help. After sailing...

aim: grampsmageeape real name: apelbert

THE AMAZING TALE OF GRAMPS MAGEE[/I] My PLEBAn friends, I should like now to tell you the story of my apey life. It shall be done in flashback form, and somewhat erratically. Please forgive me this as I am but an ape. If you have any remembrances of instances when we met in the past, feel free...

The poetry of language Is still so new to me For I am but an ape, Not human, no, not me It's not that I regret this It's not that I do mind But as an ape in the city It bugs me from time to time You know me as Bono's helper ape fixing breakfast and such things and though he is a nice man I...

I am having a bad apey day. I will probably fail out of ape university, I am alienating all my apey friends and family members, and I am low on bananas. The upside of my day was a visit to a donut shop. I got a banana-nut muffin and some orange juice. My BananaBike is handy for such trips...

my apey friends, it is so quiet today!! i suppose this is due to the holiday...but I need some advice from you. Fellow primates, I am addicted to posting on the wonderful Interference. Today alone I have alienated my friends and family. How can I control my post-al urges? I ask you-- help me...