The Hoohaa Monologues

[corianderstem]

Hey, I finally had something productive to say in FYM!

 

[U2Man]

Why does having to explain what a "vagina" is mean that you would have to have the big Sex Discussion? Couldn't you just say "it's the most important part of a woman's body"?

 

[80sU2isBest]

Do you really believe that all of the rest of us in this thread have no modesty, class and decorum because we can say the word vagina and not feel it's inappropriate?

I'm not saying you have no class, modesty or decorum. And I'm not talking about "saying the word". But if were at a party, and someone starting talking about that, I would think it was classless and showed no decorum.

I've also been wondering something else -- a while back there was a thread on asexuality and you commented that according to the website on asexuality mentioned in the initial post you would be asexual. Do you think your lack of interest in sex is part of the reason you are uncomfortable with this play and the word vagina? Do you think that this lack of interest in sex makes you more uncomfortable with the possibility of discussing sex with your child? I don't mean to be rude, but wouldn't you discussing sex be a bit like a priest discussing marriage so that would be why you don't feel comfortable doing it?

Jiminy Cricket, I can't believe you remember that. You have a good memory. To be honest, you're probably right to an extent. But the "class, modesty, and decorum" is still part of the reason, also. I guess it's a combination of all of it.

I ask this in all seriousness. I mean you've commented several times that you are of a generation that values "modesty, class and decorum" but in this thread are several of us within that same generation and although most of us are more liberal than you,

I gurantee you that not most, but every single one of you, is more liberal than me. Geoge Bush is more liberal than me. Believe me, though, that most of the people I know are also very conservative, and everyone of them would be uncomfortable with these things.

I suspect none of us are major swingers or kink-meisters (well maybe just a little ), and we certainly don't seem to have the same problem with the word or with the prospect of discussing sex with children.

I don't have a problem with the word. I just don't think it's appropriate for public display unless it serves some sort of health or medical purpose. But you're right, that if I were to have kids (I'd probably have to adopt ), it would be very difficult for me to discuss sex with them.

 

[corianderstem]

Originally posted by corianderstem, corrected by U2Man
Why does having to explain what a "vagina" is mean that you would have to have the big Sex Discussion? Couldn't you just say "it's the most important part of a woman's body"?

I'm sorry, no. My brain is the most important part of my body, thanks very much.

 

[80sU2isBest]

Hey, I finally had something productive to say in FYM!

Sure you did, it was a great point, and you delivered it in a nice polite way. People are more likely to take stock of what you're saying when it's delivered in your style, rather than the childish, provoking style of a couple of other posters.

 

[U2Man]

I'm sorry, no. My brain is the most important part of my body, thanks very much.

thats not what they taught me in school.

 

[corianderstem]

thats not what they taught me in school.

Well, if that's what they're teaching in school, no wonder there are still too many people who think that way.

And thanks, 80sU2.

 

[martha]

it would be very difficult for me to discuss sex with them.

And this is why I have to do it in school and why many people who find it "difficult" don't sign the permission slip.

And why we still have a high teen pregnancy rate in the US.

 

[80sU2isBest]

And this is why I have to do it in school and why many people who find it "difficult" don't sign the permission slip.

And why we still have a high teen pregnancy rate in the US.

Martha, good grief, did you read my earlier post in which I said that I would talk to my kids about it? Are you hung up on the fact that it would be "difficult" for me? I've got news for you, Martha, it's difficult for many parents, but they still know they need to, so they do.

Still, I do find humor in the fact that you are blaming me for the high teen pregnancy rate, specially considering that Hollywood constantly bombards our kids with movies, tv shows and advertisements that promote sex as if it were "no big deal".

 

[Vincent Vega]

Well, if that's what they're teaching in school, no wonder there are still too many people who think that way.

And thanks, 80sU2.

It's just Denmark. It's just some five to six million.

Still, I do find humor in the fact that you are blaming me for the high teen pregnancy rate, specially considering that Hollywood constantly bombards our kids with movies, tv shows and advertisements that promote sex as if it were "no big deal".

Yes, that's crazy indeed.
There is nearly no movie that doesn't have a sex scene.
And so often you just ask yourself: "How does that fit into the context of this movie?"

 

[martha]

Still, I do find humor in the fact that you are blaming me for the high teen pregnancy rate, specially considering that Hollywood constantly bombards our kids with movies, tv shows and advertisements that promote sex as if it were "no big deal".

To paraphrase you, go back and reread what I said. I didn't say you were responsible for the high teen preganancy rate. I was blaming reluctant, uptight parents in general. If you feel that shoe fits you, go ahead and wear it proudly.

 

[80sU2isBest]

To paraphrase you, go back and reread what I said. I didn't say you were responsible for the high teen preganancy rate. I was blaming reluctant, uptight parents in general. If you feel that shoe fits you, go ahead and wear it proudly.

No, you blamed me and others.

You responded to something that I said about myself. I said "It would be difficult for me to discuss sex with my kids", and you said "That is why I have to do it in school" and "and why we still have a high teen pregnancy rate in the US".

How is that not blaming me?

 

[martha]

I give up. Be as repressed and "classy" as you want. There's still nothing wrong with children knowing the proper words for body parts. There's nothing wrong with tastefully done art that respectfully uses the correct terms for actual body parts.

 

[80sU2isBest]

I give up.

Which means that you realize that the way you worded what you wrote does indeed look like you were blaming me?

Be as repressed and "classy" as you want. (1) There's still nothing wrong with children knowing the proper words for body parts. There's nothing wrong with tastefully done art that respectfully uses the correct terms for actual body parts.

(1) Never said there was anything wrong with that. I don't know how anyone could take anything that I said and make it out to be me saying that children shouldn't know the correct terms for body parts.

(2) Never said there was anything wrong with that, either. I just said that there are certain things that are inappropriate in certain places.

 

[martha]

Which means that you realize that the way you worded what you wrote does indeed look like you were blaming me?

No. It's pointless discussing anything with you.

 

[80sU2isBest]

No. It's pointless discussing anything with you.

That's how I feel about people who clearly say something and continue to deny it even when I lay it right out in front of their eyes.

 

[verte76]

I gurantee you that not most, but every single one of you, is more liberal than me. Geoge Bush is more liberal than me. Believe me, though, that most of the people I know are also very conservative, and everyone of them would be uncomfortable with these things.
I don't have a problem with the word. I just don't think it's appropriate for public display unless it serves some sort of health or medical purpose. But you're right, that if I were to have kids (I'd probably have to adopt ), it would be very difficult for me to discuss sex with them.

I can't believe that George Bush is more liberal than you are. There's nothing wrong with that, to be sure, but I have to use my imagination to figure out what your phiilosophy is, since I'm, uh, a few shades more liberal. I understand where you're coming from with public display, but I don't agree with it. As an artist myself, I don't do explicit stuff in my work--for starters, I suck as a figure drawer and it takes a really good figure drawer to do explicit stuff. I wouldn't be comfortable doing it if I were a good figure drawer. But hell, Ingres did nudes, and he was a really conservative guy. But as a practicing Catholic myself there are certain things I wouldn't be comfortable drawing.

 

[BVS]

this thread is funny.

 

[deep]

"The Vagalog"

 

[Rono]

this thread is funny.

...and sad at the same time.

I think people who are afraid for the word vagina,..are afraid for their own sexuality and project it on the children.

 

[BVS]

...and sad at the same time.

I think people who are afraid for the word vagina,..are afraid for their own sexuality and project it on the children.

 

[Cin]

At primary school we always called it your "baby hole". The front part was called your "fanny". This always caused lots of laughs when watching American TV. We thought they were so rude and didn't realise they were only talking about yo;ur bum.

 

[LemonMelon]

this thread is funny.

vaginavaginavaginavaginavaginavagina
vaginavaginavaginavaginavaginavagina
vaginavaginavaginavaginavaginavagina

I'm a dirty pervert.

vaginavaginavaginavaginavaginavagina
vaginavaginavaginavaginavaginavagina
vaginavaginavaginavaginavaginavagina

Seriously, there's nothing wrong with the word itself, it's WHY and HOW it's used. I doubt anyone who sees the name of a sexual organ on a marquee will automatically want to start shagging.

 

[dazzlingamy]

I think society has sexualised everything to the point where everything on the body is shamesful and needs to be covered up - we have stupid names for body parts that are there for a reason and people get all funny when talking about it.
I don't understand the fear of sex/sexuality etc. We were made to have sex, truly back in ye olde days thats all they bloody did - nothing else to do! Its an instinct - natural - and EVERYONE has done it so why the hang ups?
Do we think if a boy knows what a vagina is, he will turn into a dirty perv? Or a girl will become promiscious if she knows the word penis?

I agree that parents should have the final say in raising their children, but when it comes to the most basic things, you are fucking your children up. Making them ashamed, or confusing them, or even just not regarding anything about sex (AND sexuality) is like denying their very existance. And i just don't understand why?

 

[BVS]

I was talking about this story to a friend of mine tonight and he reminded me of a guy we went to high school with...

To say this guy was sheltered would be an understatement, I felt sorry for this guy, his parents were constantly writing excuse letters anytime we had a sex talk or body part talk in school. The boy was 17 and still refering to his penis as his "sacred part".

At our 10 year reunion the guy was divorced twice with 2 children with 2 diffierent wives... He had no clue about birth control, he married to have sex, and still can't talk about any of it.

 

[LemonMelon]

I was talking about this story to a friend of mine tonight and he reminded me of a guy we went to high school with...

To say this guy was sheltered would be an understatement, I felt sorry for this guy, his parents were constantly writing excuse letters anytime we had a sex talk or body part talk in school. The boy was 17 and still refering to his penis as his "sacred part".

At our 10 year reunion the guy was divorced twice with 2 children with 2 diffierent wives... He had no clue about birth control, he married to have sex, and still can't talk about any of it.

Damn, that's sad.

I've always been very sheltered. I don't know if I've ever heard my parents use the word vagina before (they never used a replacement word for it, it just never really came up ) but my parents (mostly my dad...my mom is definitely the conservative type) have always been open about sex, masturbation, etc. It's awkward sometimes, but after reading that, I'm pretty grateful.

 

[MrsSpringsteen]

I respect everyone's views about sexuality and how they want their children to be taught, their potential children-whatever. And I try by best not to make judgments about those views. But basically I don't believe that you can separate it from self-esteem issues in kids/teens and healthy views about sexuality and relationships. As some people have alluded to here, sometimes the more you try to avoid and conceal and protect, the more the whole issue becomes a problem.

I think the tendency might be for some to believe that the more "open" some people might be about sex, the more permissive they might be or the more "wild" or whatever terms you might use. And that really isn't fair or true in many cases. I just think that communication with kids is tied in with this whole issue and it's one of the biggest jobs of a parent to create and encourage healthy self images for kids and not shame. And to have your child feel comfortable enough to come to you about anything and everything. When they can do that they won't need to go elsewhere. And honestly I just don't see how that is possible when someone gets that upset and that uncomfortable over the word vagina being on a marquee.

 

[BonosSaint]

I think the more you use euphemisms the more you make something sound dirty and taboo and, ironically, increase the interest in it. And realistically, that taboo is mostly put upon on women. There is no empowering sense of bonding like teaching your son to pee in the snow--a kind of a celebration. For women, it's don't say it, don't show it, make sure you cover up its odor. Okay, there is the obligatory "Now you're a woman speech", but that's about it.

And Mrs. S. is right. Somehow, sometimes the message gets ingrained that it is something shameful or dirty.

You'll even see the difference in discussion between male and female masturbation. Age old fear of women's sexuality? I don't know.

 

[verte76]

Alot of this is really sad. People who aren't comfortable with basic body parts have something wrong with them. If you feel like you have to keep something hidden you've got problems with life.

 

[corianderstem]

I think there's a big difference between being uncomfortable with basic body parts and simply feeling that something might not be appropriate to be on a marquee.

I don't agree that it's inappropriate, but I understand why some people feel it is. That doesn't automatically mean they won't talk about sex with their kids, or that they'll call body parts by a silly name, it just means they don't think it's appropriate to have "Vagina Monologues" or "Puppetry of the Penis," or "Ernest XII: Ernest Has a Big Butt" splashed across a marquee.

Now, if they're going to raise a holy stink about it or pressure someone into changing it, I think that's silly. But I understand why some people just might not think it's the greatest thing in the world.

My parents, for instance, made sure I knew about sex, and used proper terms. But I think they fall into the group that feels these types of things are inappropriate. I don't think that makes them sad, and there certainly isn't anything wrong with them. I think that view is a little old-fashioned, and that's okay. I don't think the same way, but it's okay.

I just feel like this thread is turning into a little bit of "let's point at 80sU2isbest and his ilk and laugh at them! Look at how sad and afraid of sex and the female body they are!"

Sorry if I've misinterpreted.