Sticks and stones will break my bones...

[U2democrat]

...but words will never hurt me? This is completely untrue. Words DO hurt...often more than "sticks and stones." Should we rethink teaching this to kids? Or should we leave them to believe that it is true?

 

[ouizy]

Are you serious?

I think you are missing the point of that little jingle...

 

[BVS]

I've been hit by a stick, and it hurt, it left a cut, but it healed.

I once had a rock thrown at me and it cut my forehead right above my eye, left a small scar but rarely noticable.

They've all healed.

I can't remember why I had people want to hurt me, but that's beside the point.

But some of the scars given to me by words I'll take to my grave, in fact some have almost taken me there.

 

[BluRmGrl]

I don't think the purpose of that little bon mote is to take any truth from it... I think it's just a retort to any tormentors that their words mean nothing to you. Which we all know is an absolute feckin' lie, but hey - never let 'em know they've hurt you, right?

Don't let the bastards grind you down....

 

[nbcrusader]

I think the lesson is to not let others control who you are by their own words. Sure words can hurt, and there are plenty of mean people, but we are not defined by what others say about us.

 

[najeena]

Sticks and stones can break my bones, and words can leave a scar. Let's find ways to disagree that don't injure or mar.

 

[U2democrat]

 

[Moonlit_Angel]

I think the lesson is to not let others control who you are by their own words. Sure words can hurt, and there are plenty of mean people, but we are not defined by what others say about us.

Mmhm.

The words can only bother you if you let them. Rise above the cruel remarks. Be the better person. Go on to do good things for yourself and others. That'll be more than enough to bug the cruel people.

And this is coming from someone who got made fun of quite often in school.

Angela

 

[VertigoGal]

I agree with nbcrusader and Moonlit_Angel...I think the intention is to teach kids not to let teasing get to them.

 

[nbcrusader]

BonoVoxSupastar's sig applies here.

But it is hard to phrase it that way for a 10-year old.

 

[verte76]

I also had trouble with getting picked on when I was a kid. Oh, my goodness. I was the school "coodiebug". The other kids claimed I was giving them the coodies and I was a sensitive kid. Words can hurt a kid, trust me. I had to have alot of help dealing with the pain, that's how I got my first therapist. I still have to fight the bastards getting me down.

 

[VertigoGal]

luckily kids aren't that mean to me...they're fake nice so that they can get me to do all the work on a project or so they can cheat off me. generally I just roll my eyes and tell them to fuck off, it works quite well.

 

[Saracene]

I think it's definitely a good thing to believe in, although for many people it's far easier said than done. Especially at an age when their feelings are so raw.

And stupid kids at school, etc. are only part of the problem; it's much harder to protect yourself from the hurtful words coming from those people who are supposed to care about you, i.e., parents, siblings, sometimes so-called friends.

 

[Moonlit_Angel]

And stupid kids at school, etc. are only part of the problem; it's much harder to protect yourself from the hurtful words coming from those people who are supposed to care about you, i.e., parents, siblings, sometimes so-called friends.

Yeah. The people I know well and care about are the ones whose words would have the most effect on me, if any. A random person says an insult, a kid at school makes a snide remark about me, it'll irritate me, but I'll also know that they don't know me, what they say isn't true, so I stew for a minute or two and then on with life I go.

But family and friends...obviously, I take their words to heart 'cause I care about them and everything, so an insult would bother me a bit more coming from them.

Angela

 

[U2democrat]

I was a short and little tomboy (still am really ) and I would always let my fists do my talking...thankfully I look innocent enough and never got in trouble

 

[melon]

It's a fairly meaningless saying, just like when "retarded" became "handicapped" became "mentally impaired" became "intellectually challenged."

In other words, the adage has probably lived out its usefulness.

Melon

 

[unosdostres14]

It's a fairly meaningless saying, just like when "retarded" became "handicapped" became "mentally impaired" became "intellectually challenged."

In other words, the adage has probably lived out its usefulness.

Melon

This happens quite a lot.

war on terror --> struggle against extremism

Just meaningless phrases that instill just enough fear on people to make them fear, but also covers their own arses in case things don't go the way they want them to.




But back to the topic, I strongly believe that words are much more hurtful than 'sticks and stones'. Being a minority i can relate...

 

[echo0001]

luckily kids aren't that mean to me...they're fake nice so that they can get me to do all the work on a project or so they can cheat off me. generally I just roll my eyes and tell them to fuck off, it works quite well.

I had the same sort of experiences. And telling them to fuck off generally worked except for the one bastard who tried to cheat off my test, and then caught me on the playground and beat me up 'cause I wouldn't let him (and he was three years older and I'm a girl) (and the little shit got off scott free).

Sometimes the physical is worse than the psychological--but not very often. That's the only physical attack that I can really remember; but I remember the name calling with great clarity.

I think the point of the saying is to try to remember that what they think or say doesn't matter; to let it go and try not to let their pettiness fuck your life up.

 

[Maggie1]

I think words are worse than sticks and stones. Mean loud people who talk behind someones back in an attempt to cause trouble or use name calling can cause more problems than a quick fist fight. A fight ends but words can continue to harm. Back in the day, when I was growing up, I had a lot of dates and guys calling me. Other girls did not like this and began spreding things around which were not true. These lies they told still hurt today.

 

[Tilli]

Back in the day, when I was growing up, I had a lot of dates and guys calling me. Other girls did not like this and began spreding things around which were not true. These lies they told still hurt today.

Grr.. I hate it when girls attack each other out of jealousy. Girls can be particularly nasty with their words to other girls at times.

 

[MrsSpringsteen]

I think words are far more hurtful that physical pain..that's why there's a term 'verbal abuse'

It's far easier said than done to not let what is said to you by others define and hurt you. it's like a tape that repeats in your head whenever you feel good about yourself. I think it's just easier for some people to deal with than it is for others.

I think the most painful thing is when it comes from people who are supposed to love and support you and make you feel good about yourself, not badly. If it comes from people you don't care about or feel negatively about, it's much easier to deal with.