New study: Homosexual men prone to promiscuity

[nbcrusader]

In a self-destructive way? Or as a way of seeking acceptance in an otherwise hostile world?

 

[Irvine511]

In a self-destructive way? Or as a way of seeking acceptance in an otherwise hostile world?

both.

deep down, many gay men hate themselves.

there's also a big learning curve when it comes to dating and relationships. most gay men spend their 20's and 30s learning what their straight peers learned as teenagers about how to successfully maintain a relationship.

also, the act of having sex, for a gay person, is akin to an expression of self-identity. when you've spent your life denying it, pushing it deep down, and then you finally get the chance to act on your most basic desires, many men go a bit crazy when they first come out. doctors will point to a "dangerous period" right after many gay men come out as they tend to be at their most promiscuous -- like all men, gay men calm down as they get older, and like all men, those in stable, healthy relationships are less likely to be promiscuous.

so, let's help gay people create those relationships that will benefit society -- look at the study Melon posted in the beginning of the thread.

on a personal note, i have had two relationships in my life, and both times i was 100% faithful to each man. when i'm not in a relationship, like right now, i find myself much more likely to be tempted by the ease with which a gay man can locate sex -- this ease stemming from a variety of factors, some good some not so good. the challenge, i find, is to make good decisions when it isn't terribly hard to find someone to have sex with. if i really wanted to, i think i could find, on average, a new person to have sex with every weekend. think about the temptaton that presents ... that temptation only goes away when you've felt the emptiness that one night stands bring the morning after, and the thrill of the night before starts to fade.

i'd say it's analagous to college kids and alcohol. when alcohol is finally easy to find, there's a period when kids drink to get drunk, sometimes very drunk. and then, one day, the hangover doesn't seem worth it anymore.

 

[indra]

the esteemed journal Duh.

Wouldn't that be a great name for a journal of stupid stuff? Or "The Duh Files".

 

[U2@NYC]

I agree, the study seems biased... and an example of twisting data for a purpose. But I emphasize my point that society is changing and that gay acceptance today is much higher than what it was before... it is simply a question of time.

 

[melon]

I dunno. I'm reminded of why the nature of "education" has changed so much over the centuries. It used to be that humanity put so much blind faith into their educators. That is, in the Middle Ages, if the clergy said the Earth was flat, you believed it unquestioningly. Then the clergy was disproven and people started trusting academics and doctors, etc. And now we distrust them too. The funny thing is, we have every right to distrust all of these groups, especially when we see studies like this, which have so many holes in them that anyone with 3 brain cells can put it together.

As I see it, the end result of education is to learn that we know absolutely nothing. But humanity isn't content with that; even the most disillusioned postmodernists are secretly yearning for certainty. As a result, education declines in favor of pseudointellectualism and--ta-da--religion starts creating fake studies to create certainty where it doesn't exist.

Melon

 

[zonelistener]

Ba-zing.

This report, though not this study itself, comes from the Southern Baptist news website:

http://www.bpnews.net/default.asp

'Cause they don't have an anti-gay agenda.

Or anything.

As we all know.

....and when they don't own he media, they create their own.

 

[verte76]

Great post melon. It's absurd the way we put trust in certain groups of society based on often shakey assumptions.

 

[u2bonogirl]

Did anyone ever see the abc report on republicans having better sex than Democrats?
Maybe most gays are liberals and therefore just cant find good sex.
Im kidding! Im kidding!

Seriously though, the article is extremely biased. When I see a lack of statistics for the other side of the argument I usually dismiss whatever it is somebody is reporting on

I do agree with what Irvine said in his last post about the frenzied period. I can see the logic in that.
While I dont agree with homosexuality, I also dont agree with how gays are treated and made to feel bad about themselves.
Sometimes I feel like Im treated the same way for being a Christian

 

[financeguy]

While I dont agree with homosexuality, I also dont agree with how gays are treated and made to feel bad about themselves.
Sometimes I feel like Im treated the same way for being a Christian

"...I don't agree with homosexuality..." - this to me is about as logical as saying "....I don't agree with blue eyes...." or "...I don't agree with deafness....", or any one of numerous genetically determined attributes!

"Sometimes I feel like I'm treated the same way for being a Christian" - Well, gays are beaten up and attacked and in some cases killed for being gay.Does this happen to Christians? Maybe in some parts of the world, but certainly not in America, unless I have missed something.

 

[Irvine511]

i was just doing some numbers ... if, say, i had my first sexual experience at 18 and i am now a 38 year old man and i've had 60 partners, that's, on average, 3 people a year. is that promiscuous? or is this simply a natural result of being unable to either create or maintain a relationship? if i do not have an end goal in mind when i start dating -- as in, i date someone until i get bored with someone, or they move in, but there's nothing tying us together beyond love and affection, nor are there incentives to work on problems that we might have as a couple beyond love and affection -- is it really a surprise that i might sleep with one person every four months?

 

[u2bonogirl]

"...I don't agree with homosexuality..." - this to me is about as logical as saying "....I don't agree with blue eyes...." or "...I don't agree with deafness....", or any one of numerous genetically determined attributes!

"Sometimes I feel like I'm treated the same way for being a Christian" - Well, gays are beaten up and attacked and in some cases killed for being gay.Does this happen to Christians? Maybe in some parts of the world, but certainly not in America, unless I have missed something.

Youre misinterpreting what Im saying.
I dont feel like getting into anything with you so Im not even going to defend myself on this one
I can tell you though, that Ive been threatened and physically attacked for being a Christian
and it was no different than when I saw one of my gay friends spit on in the hallway at school when I was in high school.
Just because you dont see something happening doesnt mean it doesnt happen

 

[Irvine511]

^ i think he was wondering about the word "agree with."

i am sorry people have discriminated against you simply for being a Christian. that's as unacceptable as any other form of discrimination.

 

[u2bonogirl]

^ i think he was wondering about the word "agree with."

i am sorry people have discriminated against you simply for being a Christian. that's as unacceptable as any other form of discrimination.

The only thing I was getting at was that homosexuality goes against what I believe to be right.
Considering I do things all the time that I dont consider to be right I have no room to talk though.
To me homosexuality is just a lifestyle that I wouldnt choose for myself because of what I believe in but I dont think any less of anybody for choosing it. Fortunately I was raised to not discriminate against people different than me.
And Im thankful for that.
Please dont think Im bashing anybody for being gay, thats not what Im getting at at all

 

[financeguy]

I can tell you though, that Ive been threatened and physically attacked for being a Christian
and it was no different than when I saw one of my gay friends spit on in the hallway at school when I was in high school.
Just because you dont see something happening doesnt mean it doesnt happen

I am also sorry if you have been attacked/threatened for being a Christian. Are such incidents commonplace? Are Christians frequently attacked / threatened for being Christians, in America?

I do not know the answers to these questions, but I do know that the overwhelming majority of US citizens describe themselves as Christian. I also know that this % is higher than in most Western countries. I also believe that Christianity gets a very fair hearing, to say the least, from the media.

 

[financeguy]

To me homosexuality is just a lifestyle that I wouldnt choose for myself because of what I believe in but I dont think any less of anybody for choosing it.

Homosexuality is not a lifestyle (or a matter of choice).

 

[u2bonogirl]

I am also sorry if you have been attacked/threatened for being a Christian. Are such incidents commonplace? Are Christians frequently attacked / threatened for being Christians, in America?

I do not know the answers to these questions, but I do know that the overwhelming majority of US citizens describe themselves as Christian. I also know that this % is higher than in most Western countries. I also believe that Christianity gets a very fair hearing, to say the least, from the media.

I wouldnt say that its commonplace. Certainly not as common as attacks on gays.
Im just saying that it does happen, and the majority of what happens is non physical. People looking at you like you're alien when you tell them what you believe in. I dont see that happen as often with people of other religions.
I think part of why that happens is because of the hypocrisy and judgement that comes from a lot of christians. The things they do arent what the bible tells them to do, thats their own judgement and mean nature coming through and it makes me sad.
I used to be afraid to tell people I was christian, but now I realize that I shouldnt have to hide who I am for fear of being rejected.

 

[u2bonogirl]

Homosexuality is not a lifestyle (or a matter of choice).

I totally see your point in this
To be honest, I think I would actually have to be gay to understand.

 

[the soul waits]

To me homosexuality is just a lifestyle that I wouldnt choose for myself because of what I believe in l

So you believe that one actually "chooses" to be gay?

 

[u2bonogirl]

So you believe that one actually "chooses" to be gay?

I think that some do. Not all

 

[the soul waits]

I think that some do. Not all

Ok, so the ones that choose to be gay, you don't agree with and the ones that don't choose to be but just "are", you're ok with?

 

[u2bonogirl]

In general homosexuality goes against what I believe in.
But Im not going to be out on the street with a sign shouting against gays

 

[dandy]

funny how we never see people saying that heterosexuality goes against their personal beliefs.

or prone to promiscuity, STDs, HIV/AIDS, etc.

 

[financeguy]

funny how we never see people saying that heterosexuality goes against their personal beliefs.

I have actually seen people saying that but usually just in an ironic sense to make a point.

 

[the soul waits]

funny how we never see people saying that heterosexuality goes against their personal beliefs.

or prone to promiscuity, STDs, HIV/AIDS, etc.

I'm really biting my tongue here not to speak my mind..

 

[u2bonogirl]

 

[the soul waits]

What do you mean?

 

[u2bonogirl]

me?

 

[the soul waits]

I'm sorry, I thought your thumbs-up was directed at me. Nevermind.

 

[u2bonogirl]

It was!
I was just giving you a thumbs up for not saying anything mean
sorry, I should have specified

 

[the soul waits]

Uhm, thanks, I guess?
Allthough, I'm not sure that speaking my mind equals saying something mean...

I've actually got a whole lot to say about your earlier statements, but I don't want you to feel ganged up on and chances are that it won't make the slightest difference anyway...