Maine Woman Says Sex Ed Book Is Pornographic, Refuses To Return It To Library

[UberBeaver]

Originally Posted by Angela Harlem

you should have gone to snow's house.

Why? Do the books in Ireland have better pictures? WHY DO I FIND THIS OUT NOW?

[beegee]

Originally Posted by MrsSpringsteen

"Children are not meant to be sexually active," she said.

No, but they're meant to be educated about it when the time comes and because of the library, they can be. I'm annoyed just reading about this woman. It's library property, return the damn book. Although, I am interested to see what will happen if she doesn't.

[yolland]

Originally Posted by Pearl

I should've explained what kind of talk I had growing up.

My mom came of age in the 1950s and had me at a late age. Therefore she is very conservative when it comes to sex. When she taught me about puberty and where babies come from, she wasn't afraid about that. What she was afraid of was me finding out from other people. In junior high, when sex-ed came around, she pulled me from the class. I was the laughingstock of my class when it was that time of week to discuss sex ed, because I had to go hang out in the library while my classmates got to hear about the birds and the bees (and no, the library did not have books on sex-ed either). At the time, my mom said she didn't want me to learn about sex-ed with boys in the class. But now I realize she was afraid I would learn something she didn't want me to learn. What, I don't know.

My mom thought I was too young to learn about sex itself, but the problem was, other kids knew things I didn't know. For example, in sixth grade, I wasn't quite sure what a virgin was. To make it short, I had a lot of mortifying moments that year.

Luckily, I had two older sisters who taught me about sex. It was they who subscribed me to Seventeen so I could learn more. At the time, my mom almost cancelled the subscription because she thought I was too young for the magazine. But that is where I learned what masturbation was and what oral sex was, and so on. So learning from a magazine is not pathetic.

I wasn't saying it was pathetic for you to learn from a magazine in the absence of your mother having done her job--children will read or ask about sex from whatever sources seem useful if their parents won't discuss it with them, and there's no point in criticizing them for that. But for a parent to shove a magazine subscription at a preteen/teen girl as a substitute for frank discussions from her parent(s) about sexuality does her a serious disservice, and that I do find pathetic. My parents 'came of age' in the 1940s and had fairly traditional views on marriage and families, but that didn't keep them from openly and comfortably discussing first reproduction, then later sexuality and sexual health with us. That's not to say there weren't a few areas in which they 'showed their age,' things I'm now doing differently with my own kids--for example, they never discussed the concept of sexual orientation with us, so I more or less got the impression that homosexuality was some sort of abnormal compulsive behavior, and I continued to assume that until I went to college. And there were certainly a few things I could've asked them about but didn't want to, as I'm sure will be the case with my own kids as well--teenagers do crave their privacy and are sensitive about the physical changes they're going through. You're lucky to have had older siblings of the same sex around; I think that's often very helpful for a great many kids, even when the parents are doing a pretty good job themselves.

[Zoomerang96]

meh, i don't mind this actually. the world is supersexualised, and while this is quite possibly the lamest and worst choice to make a stand against, at least someone else is tired of it.

[snowbunny00774]

Originally Posted by indra

Your mum sounds great. Yay for your mum!

Thanks on behalf of my mum!!

The more I think about it, she really was great about that stuff. She had no such relationship with her parents, and my Dad wanted no part of explaining anything. He was quite happy to let her do it. I was born when she was quite young, and I think she just wanted me to have as much knowledge as possible so I wouldn't go exploring these things myself and finding out how things work the way she did. As she once put it when I questioned her about something "if you weren't pregnant when you got married back then, people thought you couldn't have kids" lol. I know my grandparents and some of our neighbours thought sex ed etc. was a filthy practice, and the fact she stood her ground is awesome to me.

How dare this woman deny someone else the opportunity to educate their kids the way they want. Return the damn book, bloody thief

[financeguy]

Originally Posted by Zoomerang96

meh, i don't mind this actually. the world is supersexualised, and while this is quite possibly the lamest and worst choice to make a stand against, at least someone else is tired of it.

You just said what I really wanted to say, but I'm kinda tired of being the token mildly social conservative on FYM.

[Bono's shades]

Originally Posted by Zoomerang96

meh, i don't mind this actually. the world is supersexualised, and while this is quite possibly the lamest and worst choice to make a stand against, at least someone else is tired of it.

I think a book meant to educate young people about sex is a very different thing than stuff like Girls Gone Wild. I don't think this women is just tired of our oversexualized culture - she thinks kids should live in ignorance when it comes to their own sexuality. Being raised in an atmosphere like that can really mess kids up.

[corianderstem]

My mom was an OB nurse, so I got a very no-nonsense, clinically detailed talk. No made-up nicknames in my house.

Also, when we had sex ed in school (don't remember what grade ... maybe 4th?), they extended the invitation to mothers to join the class if they wanted, to partake with their daughters or whatever.

My mom was the only mother in the class to come. She said they wanted to make sure they "got it right." Like it's rocket science or something. "The vagina goes into the penis ... no wait..."

I wasn't very popular before that, and I was even less popular after that. Thanks, Mom!

[BVS]

Yeah, how does education = supersexualized?

I don't get that line of thinking...

[A_Wanderer]

I think that the impacts of this 'supersexualisation' is plain enough, fewer sexually transmitted diseases, teen pregnancies and abortions. There is also that inverse correlation (albeit one heavily complicated by socioeconomic factors) between the growing availability of internet pornography and incidents of rape.

[BVS]

Originally Posted by A_Wanderer

I think that the impacts of this 'supersexualisation' is plain enough, fewer sexually transmitted diseases, teen pregnancies and abortions.

So don't educate and kids won't have sex? There's nothing "plain enough" about it.

[A_Wanderer]

Or kids do have sex when they are 14, 15, 16 etc. but their marginally less stupid about it.

[MrsSpringsteen]

Originally Posted by Bono's shades

I think a book meant to educate young people about sex is a very different thing than stuff like Girls Gone Wild. I don't think this women is just tired of our oversexualized culture - she thinks kids should live in ignorance when it comes to their own sexuality. Being raised in an atmosphere like that can really mess kids up.

Well said. Oversexualized culture+lack of proper sex ed=disaster, however you want to define that. There are many forms.

[Liesje]

Originally Posted by A_Wanderer

There is also that inverse correlation (albeit one heavily complicated by socioeconomic factors) between the growing availability of internet pornography and incidents of rape.

Really? Aren't only a small percentage of rapes even reported though?

[Zoomerang96]

Originally Posted by BonoVoxSupastar

Yeah, how does education = supersexualized?

I don't get that line of thinking...

i was not drawing that correlation. society as a whole is supersexualised, and all i was saying was that it's kind of nice in a roundabout way that someone else is tired of it.

albeit in an unfortunate manner. this book, i can only assume, would be of far better good than bad, but i wasn't talking about the book whatsoever.

[DreamOutLoud13]

That woman's fight is so stupid. Does she really think she's going to accomplish anything? It's not like the library can't buy a new copy, and surely with all this publicity, several have already been donated. No, all she's doing is giving the book more publicity, which will encourage more people to buy it. Sure, a few are probably going to pull a stunt like hers, but in the long run, she'll accomplish nothing.

I'm glad the local library I've been frequenting my whole life is so open-minded. In their history, they've only banned a single book: a financial planning book by a woman who was later convicted of fraud. Makes sense. They have posters up of a list of the 100 most frequently banned books... many of which I borrowed from their shelves while growing up.

But they do do their best to protect kids when they can. There are three levels of library card. Orange for kids, green for teens, and pink for adults. Certain books (and movies especially) cannot be checked out under the lower levels without a librarian override. But they don't go banning sex education books from kids. Nor do they ban books about a kid having two mommies, or a pair of male penguins raising an egg together.

As for internet access, it's been a long time since I had to use the internet there, but it is filtered, and monitored (I remember one real bitch of a librarian who really liked to hover over people), and there's a separate internet room for youths (with several computers reserved specifically for MPORPG games.)

So it's not like kids are running rampant, pulling porn off the shelves in libraries across the country. People like this woman need to get a grip and open their eyes. Kids start thinking about and wanting to have sex as young as 12. You have to get to them early and teach them about risks and protection. Ignoring the problem won't make it go away. Know when teen pregnancy in the United States peaked? The 50s. Because pretending sex doesn't exist doesn't make people stop doing it. And they're going to do it whether you want them to or not. So you might as well teach them what can happen and how to prevent STDs/pregnancy.

[kafrun]

Originally Posted by U2isthebest

I hope she's prepared for her daughter to get knocked up at 15 because she doesn't know where babies come from. Way to parent!

Nah, it's all good. One of her friends will tell her all she has to do is jump up and down after sex and she won't get pregnant Friends are a wealth of knowledge.

[U2isthebest]

Originally Posted by kafrun

Nah, it's all good. One of her friends will tell her all she has to do is jump up and down after sex and she won't get pregnant Friends are a wealth of knowledge.

It's always worked for me!