Ask The Old Married Guy

[Moonlit_Angel]

Wow! I think you've stumped me.

LOL, really?

Originally posted by nbcrusader
It must have been something simple and sweet. I don't know, we seem to have fun together all the time.

Awww.... That's cool.

Originally posted by nbcrusader
I've been horrible about planning vacations or date nights - I need to get better at that.

Something tells me that from what you've shared about your wife, that's not the most important thing, so long as you two are together-but hey, if you want to work at that and do more of those kinds of things with her...great .

Originally posted by nbcrusader
Now, if she were here, I would say something like, "I was too dazzled by your beauty to remember the song."

Haha, smooth .

Angela

 

[starsgoblue]

Do you get along with the in-laws all right?

 

[Macfistowannabe]

Do you get along with the in-laws all right?

My future in-laws want to move in with us one day. No kidding.

 

[Moonlit_Angel]

Heh, seeing the little face you chose to use in response to that, Macfistowannabe, I automatically feel bad for you, LOL .

Do you get along with the in-laws all right?

Hehe, there's a good question.

Angela

 

[Angela Harlem]

Would your marriage be as strong, independant of religion? Do you feel that religion should be an integral part of anyone's relationships? Or that those relationships that dont have it (religion), lack something pivotal in keeping it stong?

congrats too

 

[Dreadsox]

15 years today

I always wanted a thread of my own

I am wondering if that is a record for the Blue Crack community...

Congrats from one Old Man to another.

 

[MrsSpringsteen]

Tks for your answers, very nice I see this elderly couple in church always holding hands and I can tell it's genuine. Somehow it doesn't seem "real" or possible to me, but honestly it brings a tear to my eye

How do you divide the household chores-is it even or does one person do more than the other?

 

[mdw3935]

15 years today

I always wanted a thread of my own

Congratulations!!!

My husband and I will celebrate our 15 year anniversary in May. Your wife sounds a lot like me with the cats. We started off with 4 cats when we first got married and now out of the original 4 we have one that is still alive and running around. He will be 15 years old in July. Now 5 cats, 2 dogs and 2 kids later, we are still together, even though my husband is not a U2 fan.


I hope you two have a great anniversary and here's to many more years together!!!!

 

[nbcrusader]

Do you get along with the in-laws all right?

Yes. Very well.

There are two important considerations regarding inlaws. First, to a certain degree, you marry a family - not an individual. Second, both spouses must realize and live as their families are subordinate to their spouse (Scripture says we cleave from our families and become one flesh with our spouse).

Obviously, problems arise when family loyalties take precedence over spouse loyalty.

 

[nbcrusader]

Would your marriage be as strong, independant of religion?

That is really hard to answer. I think the personal aspect of our faith has played an integral role in our relationship. We both take it seriously and by both focusing on one thing (Jesus Christ) we are drawn together.

Do you feel that religion should be an integral part of anyone's relationships? Or that those relationships that dont have it (religion), lack something pivotal in keeping it stong?

I wouldn't say people need a religion to have a strong relationship.

If faith plays an integral part of an individual's life, however, a relationship with someone of a different faith or no faith may have a negative impact on the strength of the relationship.

 

[nbcrusader]

How do you divide the household chores-is it even or does one person do more than the other?

This has evolved over time. When we owned a home, I took care of the outside, she took care of the inside.

Now, we have no clear cut division of labor so to speak.

Currently, my wife stays home with the kids (though her teaching is like a part time job taking about 20 hours a week). So, she takes on the lion share of household chores simply because she is at home more than I am.

However, I tend to do most of the vacuuming and most of the "fix it" type matters. If sheets are changed on the weekend, I most likely will do it.

Bottom line - I think we both take responsibility for the level of cleanliness in which we want to live (and we lean toward the neat freak side).

 

[MrsSpringsteen]

Do you do windows?

 

[nbcrusader]

Do you do windows?

Yes, I'm the window (& mirrors) guy.

At 6'4", I can reach to the top without a step stool.

 

[MrsSpringsteen]

 

[Moonlit_Angel]

to a certain degree, you marry a family - not an individual.

I like that. That's a good point.

Angela

 

[dazzledbylight]

15 years today

I always wanted a thread of my own

 

[MrsSpringsteen]

What would you say was most important in forming your ideas about/expectations of marriage-your parents' marriage, your religious beliefs, your early experiences in your marriage, or something else?

 

[nbcrusader]

What would you say was most important in forming your ideas about/expectations of marriage-your parents' marriage, your religious beliefs, your early experiences in your marriage, or something else?

Awesome question. My ideas or expectations of marriage before I got married were influenced by my parents, but not in the way you were thinking. I think I approached my marriage by learning from the mistakes of my parents and avoiding the negative things my parents did. My parents divorced after I went to law school, but I could see the problems for years.


After getting married, I know I have changed as a result of my faith and the good fortune of having a couple of close male friends (also Christians). I think one thing men typically lack is a close male friend to openlu share the trials and tribulations of married life. While I always maintain my loyalty to my wife, I can share struggles and get guidance & direction from my friends. Mostly, I hear how they approach situations in their marriage (one friend is about 7-8 years older than me).

 

[fah]

Does this mean that your birthday thead will be here in FYM

And congratulations on 15 years

 

[Do Miss America]

Not to get too personal, but how do you keep your sex life going?

I hear so many married couples talk about how sex dies when they get married and it really brings me down.

My parents haven't had sex in years. My mother has admitted this to me.

I don't want to get married(not that I have choice right now) if this is the case.

 

[Rono]

Congrats you two

Do you think your marriage, and the way you two fill in the marriage should be a example for other couples ?

 

[Doozer61]

great thread NBC!

You are truly an inspiration and alot of the things you have written, I have certainly needed to hear right now.

Thank you!

 

[nbcrusader]

Not to get too personal, but how do you keep your sex life going?

I hear so many married couples talk about how sex dies when they get married and it really brings me down.

My parents haven't had sex in years. My mother has admitted this to me.

I don't want to get married(not that I have choice right now) if this is the case.

I think the thing that has kept the flame alive the most is communication. Open dialogue about what we want, frequency, taboo, etc. keeps things going nicely. I guess approaching sex as the physical aspect of the personal relationship makes communication key.

This doesn't mean you stick to a puritanical missionary position lifestyle - there are a lot of ways to explore and grow. If done together and not forced, it adds real fire to the relationship.

 

[nbcrusader]

Do you think your marriage, and the way you two fill in the marriage should be a example for other couples ?

Should be? No.

But the way I look at it, we've been through the highs and lows so that we can share our experiences with others. Maybe it can help, maybe it won't.

 

[deep]

How/when did you land in Newport Beach?

 

[BluRmGrl]

Congrats on 15 years NBC!! Mr. Blu & I just celebrated 13 on 2/22. To steal a slogan from the Peace Corps, isn't being married the hardest job you've ever loved?

Of course, with 15 yrs under your belt, I'd have to guess the answer to that is a resounding YES! Hope you & the Mrs. have a wonderful evening!!

 

[nbcrusader]

How/when did you land in Newport Beach?

February 2000

We had a home in Laguna Niguel, but our church and friends were all located in Newport. We felt it necessary to live closer so we could be more available.

 

[BostonAnne]

Congrats nbc & mrs. nbc!

 

[BVS]

Don't have a question just a

 

[hiphop]

Bravo! 15 years is a lot.