U2girl

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As someone who has read these boards for over a year now, and seen so many squabbles between people - I always wonder why there is fighting, and why people get so emotional. Are we in seventh grade again? Because it seems to be that some people are taking this community to be more of a greater emotional importance than it should be. Sure, when you're young, emotions bubble up and it seems like your whole world is crashing down when someone talks about you, is spiteful, is vengeful, is vindictive, is smug or just nasty in general. I choose not to post all the time because I choose not to take the Internet and Message Boards too seriously. I joined to make friends with other U2 fans - but I never take it to a personal place when I have a real life that has absolutely nothing to do with the Internet. I find it sad when others take the assholes who are assholes because of the anonymity they are granted too seriously. I think this place is loads of fun - but when adolescent emotions are thrown in the stew, it creates an annoyance for everyone who is just trying to chill and unwind from their day with other intelligent people online who share similar passions. Don't sweat the small stuff brothers & sisters - because as someone said earlier in the thread - there are so many more important things going on in the world that have proven we all need to tolerate and enjoy each other more than ever. It's just too easy for some to be assholes when it's not to someone's face.

It's always important to pick your battles - not have your dukes drawn as a default.

------------------
Here's to the few who forgive what you do
and the fewer who don't even care
--Leonard Cohen
 
Originally posted by mikal:
Well, think if this thread was written about you. Wouldn't you feel a little humiliated? I would!



*decides to post a humiliating post about Mikal... bwah! ha! ha!
biggrin.gif
 
Originally posted by doctorwho:
*decides to post a humiliating post about Mikal... bwah! ha! ha!
biggrin.gif



NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LOL



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Macphisto worships me!
 
Originally posted by doctorwho:

Hi U2girl!
biggrin.gif


I wasn't commenting on YOUR sense of humor or how you indicate your sense of humor. Rather, I was commenting on how you may miss many subtleties simply because English is not your first language - and your response above verifies my point. While YOU may put in plenty of smileys
smile.gif
not everyone else does. As such, you may miss the fact that someone is just teasing you.

When BEAL was here (sniff...
frown.gif
) he and I used to write what would appear to be the cruelest comments to each other. But they were funny (most people found BEAL to be incredibly humorous, even surpassing - dare I say it? - deathbear!
wink.gif
) and both BEAL and I understood this humor. But if BEAL or I wrote those comments to you, clearly we would horribly offend you. Therefore, I was stating that we on Interference remember that you might not "get" our humor for reasons of language and culture. In other words, this comment meant that WE had to change a bit, not you.

For the posts that you do "get" I ask that you do keep a sense of humor about you. A little teasing isn't meant to be insulting; rather, if often is quite complimentary. Many people only tease those they truly like and/or respect. That bond of friendship, even via the 'net, allows them to feel comfortable enough with a person to tease them.

Lastly, if someone does disagree with you, is it really worthwhile to become so incredibly defensive or insulted? It is impossible to have everyone agree with you, therefore, you must allow for and expect alternate views. Challenging each contradiction to your opinion seems a monumental waste of energy.

hi! (Homer Simpson voice: "D-oh!" just as i was about to leave.
biggrin.gif
)

how do you know you would offend me? try me!

i think one part of the "humor incident"
smile.gif
is the matter of taste and the other you mentioned culture. perhaps the solution would be we all change a little-or never try another joke again!
wink.gif


about "getting jokes": let me rephrase it, what i meant was-if i get the joke, it doesn't mean i will like it. you know? i may know it's teasing, or any particular jokes (sexual jokes, "putting people down", sarcasm, irony etc...) - but i may not be into that particular type of jokes.
and it really depends on each joke-if it seems funny to me, i'll laugh. there's no formula for what's funny or why something is not funny. and it depends from the person who's reading it. sort of a chemistry between the reader and the joke-if you know what i mean.

about the last paragraph: there is a difference between bashing and normal discussion. rougerum was/is an example of a discussion with arguments and without negativity. also, he never got personal (not counting the infamous "all my posts on page 1" project)-he just stuck to the issue. at least that's the impression i got from him.



[This message has been edited by U2girl (edited 10-06-2001).]
 
well this is trully an interesting thread.

u2girl, just please stop insinuating everything has to do with sg ok? i mean really, enough is enough.

i say we close this thread. enough has been said, and only worse things will come out of it.

------------------
-deathbear
 
Can I take on the role of "Den Mother" for a minute?
This is not directed to anyone in specific.


-E-mailing people about issues that bother us would save a lot of pain to everyone. And I'm not talking just about this thread but about a whole lot of threads from the past and present.

-Remember the purpose of the forum; to share our love for U2 and have fun.

-Don't dwell over the same thing and don't drag out of the closet all the dirty laundry, it just makes matters worst.

-Take a break, keep things in perspective.

-You don't have to have the last word on everything, you don't have to prove anything to anybody here, this the internet not real life.

Thank You.
smile.gif




[This message has been edited by NicaMom (edited 10-06-2001).]
 
U2girl. do you remember the cape BP Fallon wore during the ZooTV tour?The one with Elvis on the back. If I had it, I'd drape it on your shoulders right now. They must be very broad and somewhat weary to have carried all the shite that some people have tried to heap upon them here at times. I have quietly witnessed heart-breaking threads that have been set up with no other apparent reason than to enjoy your reaction and discomfort.Your love of U2 is apparent, so is the fact that what is posted here is controlled by Elvis and his mods.We, the U2 fans, can either like it or lump it.

**cass leaves U2girl more waratahs** an Aussie bloom that shoots up thru stony ground.
 
This is a confusing one

Clearly embarrassing someone in this manner in this way is not good. However, it does beg the question why this person, in this case U2girl, was put in this position.

Unfortunately, it IS partly down to the fact that, like it or not, U2girl does tend to rub an awful lot of people up the wrong way. This is due mainly I think to her innocence and the fact English is her second or maybe third language. But maybe there is another side to her... who knows? We all have our own opinions.

However, it equally partly due to the fact that U2girl is a regular poster who does not fit into one of the cliques which are dotted around this forum. Her allies (though we shouldn't be using that word at all) are more of the silent observors here.

It also doesn't help that Sicy clearly does not like her either, and does tend to make fun of her an awful lot. A little teasing does no-one any harm, but too much is tantamount to bullying - especially as Sicy is a moderator - and she should really know better and just ignore it.

Also, people who talk about the big happy U2 interference family are naive in the extreme. This place just mirrors the real world... you'll get your quiet types, your bigots, your clowns, your manic depressives, your self-loathing types, your intelligent types, your blinkered types. And all the other ones as well. I'm sure you can all place the names of certain people on here into those categories.

So while not everyone can get along, I suggest the same as what a lot of other people have said. If someone grates you, just ignore them. Vendettas have no place on this forum. And neither do bullies nor attention seekers.

Thanks.

And if you don't agree, I'll come and kill you all
biggrin.gif
 
I never saw the thread in question, so I suppose I'm left a bit in the dark on this one, but from what I have gathered, this is the advice I shall give:

Never take Bebe's advice on a subject in which she has been left in the dark.

biggrin.gif


Oh yeah, and to nobody in particular, let's all lighten up--after all we will be ELEVATED once more... perhaps we will reach greater heights with a lighthearted nature
wink.gif
 
U2girl is not completely blameless in this matter. This situation would have been dropped a long time ago if she could ever just let it rest! Sicy would have happily dropped this argument but U2girl kept bringing it up. Elvis even changed her status just because it made her uncomfortable. It's time to drop it now.

Originally posted by Angela Harlem:

U2girlie. I like you, I like your comments. But you need a break. You need to let this slide. I know you dont want to, you feel wronged. But Sicy does too. You 2 just dont get on. There is nothing wrong with that. You cant like everyone. But for her sanity, and yours, leave it be? Please? Acrobat is right.

So is Slomey, the mods are here to keep the balance/peace. They aren't out to win popularity contests. It just helps that they are pretty nice folks.

And avoid Sicy when you come back! It will be easy, SG does her thang, you do yours.

Easy!
smile.gif




------------------
Remember the goul.

Shake n' bake
Do whatever it takes
 
Originally posted by follower:
My thoughts precisely Laura...that?s the reason why I have been away lately. I?m not better than anyone here, I?m just a dierhard U2 fan and a peace lover, like you and many others. I definitely don?t like to waste my short free time reading people attacking each other or just trying to show off. I still hope that things here change somehow. It used to be a nice place to talk about U2.


Amen sister!!

I'm also away because of the same circumstances


[This message has been edited by popmart_in Mexico (edited 10-06-2001).]
 
I haven't participated much here in recent months but this is what I've gathered from reading the many posts and threads...

It seems like U2girl does rub people the wrong way but she never, ever gives in!!! - and I think this is actually part of the problem people have with her!!
They condemn and insult her for the quantity and quality of threads - but this has never stopped her from continuing to post as frequently as before nor has it ever caused her to change the type of thread she posts either.
She just keeps on doing her own thing, whether people like it or not...and I think it's this strength and indifference to other people's criticisms that infuriates some - she doesn't try to change to please people...she doesn't brownnose to the mods or to anyone else for that matter..she's never succumbed to the enormous, constant pressure on her to behave in a certain way...She could have easily done this before hand to please and appease others but she never did - she's remained true to herself and I think everyone secretly admires this about her.
And of course because they don't get a rise/reaction from her, the abuse actually intensifies until it spirals out of control (like now!) and people continue to be frustrated by her unwillingness to not "let the bastards grind her down"

[This message has been edited by ladywithspinninghead (edited 10-06-2001).]
 
U2Girl-I try to stick up for you because i think of Nancy's point about this being a personal matter, but, I do like your status and remember that as macphisto's dog walker that means that you actually walk ME. If you don't like that then fine I will go back to having Larry walk me
wink.gif
.

Your status of having the most closed threads was brought up by somebody in my thread about my first thread closing-which i am proud of. You should be too!

Zooropaamanda-if you are dead then can I have my Z back
wink.gif
 
Yeah lets let everybody be NIIIICE to eachother.
I agree w Nica and Dr(i-can-be-a-bastard-if-u-get-me-mad)Who
and the attorney lady who was married to that cop but found a better man- and a few others.
You can tell there is an occassional misinterpretation from U2Girl-read between her lines,and everybody be nice or Im gonna tell Bono on all of you..
Thank
(Nica dont be
borrowing my T.Y.'S
w/o asking..jk)
You..
Diamond
Bruno
Nine


------------------
"..it's about breaking barriers, transcending boundries and conquering great divides"-Bono 1987

---------
An open letter to Bono from myself www.arizonaautoweb.com/bono/
 
I think this board has gone to hell, but it is not too late to get it back.

I really think people can learn a lot from bonovista, brettig, and gina marie's posts, among others. This whole situation has gotten way out of control (especially for an internet forum!), and I wish there could be peace. But it seems like people are being quite cruel towards others and just making it worse and worse.

And Elvis, could this not have been resolved by email instead of making a public example of U2girl at her expense? I also agree with brettig that you are suggesting the moderators have an almost dangerous power over the rest of us. Usually, a "moderator" is someone who is an outsider and can fairly and justly moderate a situation without biases. In this forum, some of the moderators are biased against certain people because they are involved in the shit that goes down here. The phrase that flashes across my mind here is ABUSE OF POWER.

I hope there is peace, eventually...but until then I guess I will have to deal with being disgusted by certain threads but trying to find the good ones among the bad
frown.gif


[This message has been edited by Nancy (edited 10-06-2001).]
 
Originally posted by U2Bama:
It never would have come to all of this had it not been for deathbear, rougerum and me.

~U2Alabama

nope. there were clashes before.
 
Originally posted by doctorwho:
[BU2girl, of course, must also realize that a comment said against her is not always an attack. Have confidence in yourself, U2girl!
biggrin.gif


Defend yourself if absolutely necessary, but do so in a concise, clarifying manner - don't begrudge people their questions.

Lastly, U2girl, try not to pry. This is a boardroom about U2. Some people choose to share their thoughts and feelings about personal topics, others do not. If someone does not wish to share, then do not push them. It is impolite and immature to do so.

a bit more of replying to you:
hmmmm...true, what you're saying makes sense.
though it's hard to be confident with negavitity all over the place (like you said yourself, you experienced it too).

i guess to an outside observer it may seem like i overreact and defend myself too much. since i am writing about myself it is not possible for me to be objective. i begrudge things. so do others.

the last part confuses me: there was only one occassion when i wrote a prying question (Bonovista-well it was prying to her). and i didn't push anything-she chose to answer me.
i'm not sure which of my threads you were referring to? can you be more specific?
also: did you read the "virgin" question by Sicilian Goddess? now THAT is prying.

thanks to all of those who support me, or see my point at the very least.

ps: about the "this is only fun" argument. it's not fun anymore when it's full of negativity.

and Bonovista saved herself from another question when posting the birthday thread.
smile.gif

("Daddy Paul" part-i was wondering how the kids call him. and how they accepted him. glad i didn't do it-in case of any hostility coming up)

pps: phew! all answers i wanted to make were made. i've got to stop posting so much.
biggrin.gif





[This message has been edited by U2girl (edited 10-06-2001).]
 
Nancy couldn't have said it any better!

The fact that this thread was started in the first place is a damn shame. This should have been a private matter, period!

No matter what she has done to anyone, u2girl should not be publicly humiliated like this.

We're here for one reason only; because we love U2. I think some people have forgotten that!

------------------
Macphisto worships me!
 
I dont think this is really a public humiliation of U2girl, since we are all siding with her anyway... or at least a few of us are.
 
Originally posted by clarityat3am:
I've had my share of fallings out with U2girl myself, and you know what it is that upsets me the most is that she doesn't seem to understand our humor or sarcasm, and if she does she certainly doesn't let it slide. She's not open or accepting of other people's opinions or beliefs either. The reason that the same people get into the same arguments with her is because she responds to the same questions/statements that she "hates" so much and finds so inappropriate over and over and over again. It's very difficult to *not* say something back at her when she never lets things go. I think we'd all be hard pressed to find a thread of hers that didn't turn into an outright brawl for one reason or another. Yes, I'm guilty of fighting with her like we're 12 years old, but I can honestly say that I've only started the situation myself a couple of times. The rest of the time I wasn't bashing her or telling her off. Hell, most of the times that I can recall I was just trying to tell her in an objective way what it was that she was doing that was causing all these ridiculous problems anyway. Either way, she's grouped me in with Sicy and there I shall stay. If that's how she wants it to stay then that's how I'll leave it. I'm not going to argue with anyone else on this board about her or with her about anything again. In fact, I'm not going to respond to her posts in any thread. At this point I think that's the only solution to this problem. That's my rant...I'm done.


ok, one more for today.
smile.gif


i am open to other people's opinions. other people aren't open to mine.

indeed. bashing. say no more.
frown.gif


i didn't group anyone anywhere, your answers were very clear. you grouped with her on your own-or i should say your posts put you on her side.

as for not ever arguing again: arguing is a part of people. it is inevitable. you can't avoid it forever. sooner or later you're bound to get into an ugly browl.
 
Originally posted by ~unforgettableFOXfire~:
I dont think this is really a public humiliation of U2girl, since we are all siding with her anyway... or at least a few of us are.

Well, think if this thread was written about you. Wouldn't you feel a little humiliated? I would!


------------------
Macphisto worships me!
 
Originally posted by mikal:


u2girl should not be publicly humiliated like this.

We're here for one reason only; because we love U2. I think some people have forgotten that!


YOU said it all!! Stuff that goes on here sometimes makes me ASHAMED to be a U2 fan-only as it relates to here.

And I AGREE-this should have been handled PRIVATELY
 
Originally posted by Angela Harlem:
get pissed down your at local

ok, i gotta ask this:
i read about Bono talking about his father "pissed as a fart".

pissed=drunk, right? not meaning peeing, right?
biggrin.gif
wink.gif


in that particular area, i have to dissapoint you: i don't drink. LOL

and once and for all: i am NOT humiliated by this.
confused? maybe. mad? yes. surprised? you betcha.
but i don't feel humiliated. don't worry about that-i don't see this as something trying to humiliate me. it's just a clash. it just happens to be out here and not in emails.
no biggie
smile.gif


ps: "there's nothing you can throw at me, that i haven't already heard"-no one could possibly put me down like i can do it to myself.



[This message has been edited by U2girl (edited 10-06-2001).]
 
Theres very little that humiliates me, Ive grown up being teased by kids cuz I was smarter and all sorts of bullshit. Just because someone says something that tries to humiliate me, usually it ends up with me laughing at them and just lashing back at them. People cant really make me feel bad about myself, I am who I am and nothing and noone can change that... But then again Im not U2girl... Lets just put this to rest and let everyone be happy and not bitching about various issues that have no relevance to U2
 
Originally posted by U2girl:
*ahem* about the humor, doctorwho and others who pointed this out:

i can always laugh at clean, non-harmful humor (example: Salome, J. Swallow, Angela Harlem etc...). i think i wrote enough LOL's, ROTFs, and posted enough smileys to let it show. i think i pretty much get the humor around here-i don't think language is the problem.


Hi U2girl!
biggrin.gif


I wasn't commenting on YOUR sense of humor or how you indicate your sense of humor. Rather, I was commenting on how you may miss many subtleties simply because English is not your first language - and your response above verifies my point. While YOU may put in plenty of smileys
smile.gif
not everyone else does. As such, you may miss the fact that someone is just teasing you.

When BEAL was here (sniff...
frown.gif
) he and I used to write what would appear to be the cruelest comments to each other. But they were funny (most people found BEAL to be incredibly humorous, even surpassing - dare I say it? - deathbear!
wink.gif
) and both BEAL and I understood this humor. But if BEAL or I wrote those comments to you, clearly we would horribly offend you. Therefore, I was stating that we on Interference remember that you might not "get" our humor for reasons of language and culture. In other words, this comment meant that WE had to change a bit, not you.

For the posts that you do "get" I ask that you do keep a sense of humor about you. A little teasing isn't meant to be insulting; rather, if often is quite complimentary. Many people only tease those they truly like and/or respect. That bond of friendship, even via the 'net, allows them to feel comfortable enough with a person to tease them.

Lastly, if someone does disagree with you, is it really worthwhile to become so incredibly defensive or insulted? It is impossible to have everyone agree with you, therefore, you must allow for and expect alternate views. Challenging each contradiction to your opinion seems a monumental waste of energy.
 
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