Least badass songs ever!

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UberBeaver said:


Oh. Shit.
Click to expand...

There is not one iota of this video that does not kick ass. From the compelling story to the special effects to the rocking tune to the Native American mythology to the stereotypical hair metal - and of course the brothers with guitars silhouetted in a stance that clearly says, "We are going to not just kick ass -but dominate the fuck out of ass - and then, after we feel ass has been kicked sufficiently, maybe we'll start rocking" - this video has it all.
 
A couple of years ago, MTV aired a special where they "retired" the 25 worst videos. Vanillla Ice appeared and went nuts with a bat at one point. Anyway, Jon Stewart, Chris Kattan, Denis Leary and a then-funny Jeanne Garofalo hosted...and it was a crack up....when they got to the Nelson video, and the teen aged kid pops up with Nelson at a fire with an Indian Chief, out of nowhere, Leary says "Whoa....where the hell are they?" and Stewart immediately says "I think they're at Foxwoods".
 
http://youtube.com/watch?v=PHaI4uZ4oeg&feature=related

3:10 - least badass moment in history. One day, when the universe is cold and dark and the planets have been worn down by gravity and only black holes remain, the gods will convene and say, "dude, remember that scene in the Nelson video where they were sitting next to each other singing? That was the least cool moment ever. The universe is better off this way." "Yeah man, no doubt. Though this was pretty awful too: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivI1kICIVFA ." "Ouch. Last time I saw a person with a haircut like that she was dropping her kids off at soccer practice."
 
Last edited:
No spoken words said:
A couple of years ago, MTV aired a special where they "retired" the 25 worst videos. Vanillla Ice appeared and went nuts with a bat at one point. Anyway, Jon Stewart, Chris Kattan, Denis Leary and a then-funny Jeanne Garofalo hosted...and it was a crack up....when they got to the Nelson video, and the teen aged kid pops up with Nelson at a fire with an Indian Chief, out of nowhere, Leary says "Whoa....where the hell are they?" and Stewart immediately says "I think they're at Foxwoods".
Click to expand...

lol. That's awesome. They watched the videos like Beavis and Butthead?

I remember the Vanilla Ice thing.
 
Anyone for another installment in impy Masterpiece Theatre?

impy13 said:
It's strange to me to have an album with a sinister looking Kool Aid Man on the cover, but the title is so kind.

Which also makes the song itself sound even worse in that he's trying to sound like a hardass while singing "have a nice dayyyyy."



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vQltvEU5oH0&search=bon jovi home

I've bashed that song a lot in this thread, but the video is even worse. A fun drinking game to play is to watch this video and take a shot every time Richie Sambora pulls a stupid fucking face. You're more or less guaranteed to get alcohol poisoning by the end of the video. (The most ridiculous looking of all the faces is at the 3:00 mark during the middle eight. You take three shots for this face. It's that bad.)

I don't think I've ever hated a music video this much.
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Fucking Bon Jovi.

During the Elevation Tour, I had seats sort of facing the celebrity pit, in front of the soundboard, from the side, out at Staples Center. Hanson, Tom Cruise, Cameron Crowe, Eddie Vedder, Val Kilmer and Billy Zane were all in there, and it was hard not to watch them watch U2. Hanson were freaking out, all 3 of em. The others were into it. Who else was in there? Jon Bon fucking Jovi. Looking bored as fuck. I knew I could not stand their music prior to that, but, seeing him standing there, not even moving his head at all, made me want to destroy him. Destroy.

And, yeah, Beav, it was like MST3K or Beavis & Butthead. It was really funny.
 
No spoken words said:
Fucking Bon Jovi.

During the Elevation Tour, I had seats sort of facing the celebrity pit, in front of the soundboard, from the side, out at Staples Center. Hanson, Tom Cruise, Cameron Crowe, Eddie Vedder, Val Kilmer and Billy Zane were all in there, and it was hard not to watch them watch U2. Hanson were freaking out, all 3 of em. The others were into it. Who else was in there? Jon Bon fucking Jovi. Looking bored as fuck. I knew I could not stand their music prior to that, but, seeing him standing there, not even moving his head at all, made me want to destroy him. Destroy.

And, yeah, Beav, it was like MST3K or Beavis & Butthead. It was really funny.
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Thanks for that story, NSW. I'm always looking for more fuel to keep my Bon Jovi hate alive.

What a douche.

Remember when Jick would argue how we should respect them because they've been around as long as U2? And how the bands had mutual respect for each other? Riiiiight. I'm sure Edge loves to talk shop with that fucking hack Richie Sambora.
 
UberBeaver said:
A good lyric is more badass than a good video.
Click to expand...

And the ultimate effect is, I get to read the "Most Badass" song and actually hear the "Least Bad ass."

It's the internet equivalent of "This milk is spoiled, here, smell it!"

:ohmy:
 
lol! no worries

U2 doesn't count - I was already hopelessly hooked by 83/84 and it wouldn't have mattered to me if they never got on mainstream radio at all, to be honest...by 87/88 I was about as far away from top 40 radio as I could possibly get..
 
UberBeaver said:


There is not one iota of this video that does not kick ass. From the compelling story to the special effects to the rocking tune to the Native American mythology to the stereotypical hair metal - and of course the brothers with guitars silhouetted in a stance that clearly says, "We are going to not just kick ass -but dominate the fuck out of ass - and then, after we feel ass has been kicked sufficiently, maybe we'll start rocking" - this video has it all.
Click to expand...

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
 
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