Friends with "benefits"

[cell]

Would you have sex with your friend even if you weren't "together"?

Discuss.

 

[LarryMullen's POPAngel]

I had this chance last summer.


I decided not to, got screwed anyway.

 

[Headache in a Suitcase]

would, have, and will again

 

[sulawesigirl4]

Depends on the friend.

 

[Stories for Boys]

well, i wouldn't have sex with anyone at this point in my life...so i'm going to say no...that and i believe sex out of wedlock is pointless, oxy moronic, and morally wrong. but hey, that's just my opinion...

 

[MissVelvetDress_75]

nope. but i know people who do have that on call friend who is simply a "booty call" and nothing more.

 

[beegee]

uh, i know we're getting together next wednesday.
what exactly are you trying to say?

 

[SkeeK]

It's hard to say yes or no, I'd say its totally situation dependant. But in general, i think it's an okay thing to do, and I might, depending on the situation of course.

 

[Elvis Presley]

nope

 

[HeartlandGirl]

I see no problem with it.

 

[cell]

uh, i know we're getting together next wednesday.
what exactly are you trying to say?

i love it when you read between the lines


so, i guess i should answer my own question...i've been there done that and i dont want to do it again. it wasn't recent, but its a bad choice i made. recently my "friend" wanted to, but i said no. then i found out later he's still with his gf. i felt sick that he would cheat on her, and relieved that i told him no. i guess it depends on the friendship, and character. thats my answer and im sticking to it.

 

[Angela Harlem]

Some people, you can't live with them, you can't live without them.

No relevance really.

 

[Diemen]

Hmm...in general I don't really like the idea of friends with benefits and I would say no if you value this friend as a person much. I personally couldn't use someone just for sex, whether she was fine with it or not. Inevitably I would want something more, and that's where things get even more complicated . I've kinda sorta done this, although I was dating my friend at the time, so it wasn't by any means a mere booty call (more like her rebound, but hey... ).

Hopefully if you get into this kind of situation you could see yourself together with the other person.

 

[MissVelvetDress_75]

Hmm...in general I don't really like the idea of friends with benefits and I would say no if you value this friend as a person much. I personally couldn't use someone just for sex, whether she was fine with it or not. Inevitably I would want something more, and that's where things get even more complicated...
Hopefully if you get into this kind of situation you could see yourself together with the other person.

that is how i see it.

 

[Headache in a Suitcase]

cujo and mofo have been friends with benefits for years now... and they seem to get along just fine.

 

[meegannie]

No!!!!

I would throw up.

 

[AliEnvy]

I imagine many a good friendship has been ruined by sex. It's a dangerous game, but to each his own.

And I'd be curious to know, for those who have been successful at this, when one of you got into a new relationship, did you tell your partner about it and do you still hang around with that friend?

 

[cujo]

YES!

 

[AliEnvy]

What made it work out so well do you think?

 

[cujo]

What made it work out so well do you think?

Oh sorry, I wasn't intentionally responding to your query. I couldn't control myself and just voted yes to the thread.

cujo

 

[kobayashi]

this ratio doesnt really exist. and its irrelevant for me. really.

depends on the hotness of the girl (represented by hgirl) to the quality of friendship (represented by fquality) ratio.

also written as hgirl : fquality. it has to be at least 3:1 to do the deed unless the quality of friendship is below 3, in which case the person isnt considered much of a friend anyway.

 

[cujo]

You have proven yet another postulate of the Riemann Sum Kobe.

 

[diamond]

im not about cheap sex

 

[MissVelvetDress_75]

Re: this ratio doesnt really exist. and its irrelevant for me. really.

depends on the hotness of the girl (represented by hgirl) to the quality of friendship (represented by fquality) ratio.

also written as hgirl : fquality. it has to be at least 3:1 to do the deed unless the quality of friendship is below 3, in which case the person isnt considered much of a friend anyway.

what an interesting and confusing equation.

emotionless sex does not interest me at all. besides i wouldn't want to know how my male friends look naked and how they are in the sack that thought makes me want to

 

[BAW]

I say in theory yes... but in practice no.


No matter what ground rules you set up, someone will almost always start to have feelings beyond friendship. I guess it can work in certain situations but probably not for me.

 

[dsmith2904]

Both people have to be completely honest about what they want and what they expect. There are people in the world who can have emotionless sex (that sounds harsh), where they don't have to be involved with the person they're sleeping with and it's no big. If both people feel that way, go for it.
There are so many situations where it's not that way, where one of the friends has strong feelings and thinks that by sleeping with their friend, somehow something will click and the two of them will end up together. No good can come of it.
Sex with exes is pretty much the same thing. I had a friend who was sleeping with his ex-wife and completely clueless to the fact that she was still in love with him and hoping to win him back.

 

[zonelistener]

Re: this ratio doesnt really exist. and its irrelevant for me. really.

depends on the hotness of the girl (represented by hgirl) to the quality of friendship (represented by fquality) ratio.

also written as hgirl : fquality. it has to be at least 3:1 to do the deed unless the quality of friendship is below 3, in which case the person isnt considered much of a friend anyway.

I jsut needs some clarification here Kobe....the scale...is 1 being a high/positive in the ratings department, or is it a low/negative. It reads as 1 is low, but I would also have to know exaclty what the top end of the scale is. 3:1 could be REALLY bad, or, say, if the scale is based on a scale of 5, 1 could be the lowest number, but not as bad as, say, 1 on a 1-100 scale. Catch my drift?

 

[kobayashi]

better quantification of values can lead to better sex for you and all your friends

lol

the scales are measured out of 10 with 1 being the lowest and 10 being the highest. the threshold should have been 1, in other words if the fquality is lower than 1...well than it doesnt matter about the ratio. you barely know the person.

so a 9:3 meets the criteria but only by a bit, theyre an alright friend. on the other hand the person is apparently really hot.

 

[JimmyChicken]

I wouldn't dream of it!!!

Until that darn grog takes over. Oh how the grog makes me do naughty things. Oh the shame!!! The shame!!! I'll never get drunk again...

Ahhhhh who am I kidding...

 

[zonelistener]

Anything with a hgirl factor of 8 or higher I think often blinds the mjudgement factor, and may really negate the fquality factor in a lot of cases.

Just my opinion.