Lemon - Part 17 (Bono gives up smoking and Edge gives up Larry's underwear... hmm?!)

The friendliest place on the web for anyone that follows U2.
If you have answers, please help by responding to the unanswered posts.

GarfieldTheCat

The Fly
Joined
Oct 1, 2005
Messages
100
Chapter 17
----------

They all join back in with everyone.
Now its Jeannie and Edge going at it. lol.
Edge insulting the way Bono smells and some other crazy shit... as Jeannie defends him. Gets quite funny.
"See, they're both desperately in love me. They're fighting over me... Edge won't admit it, but he has a crush on me..." Bono laughs.
"Shut the feck up!" Edge blurts at Bono.. jumping right back in with his joking argument with Jeannie.
"See what I mean? Its such a glorious thing", Bono smirks.

Adam and Karen look at eachother shaking their heads trying to keep from bursting out laughing.

Beatrice was having a great old time.
She was more than convinced this was where Jeannie belonged.

"You feckin' lunatic!" Edge screeches... laughing.
"HAH!! No, I don't think so you bloody beanie man", Jeannie snorts back, amusing herself.
The rest of them hardly have any clue what the heck they are talking about now... except for Bono of course.. who seems to be glued to the whole thing. Well, of course it seemed to mainly be over him, too. LOL.

"get outta here, you feckin' Fly..." edge said, pretending to swat bono away.
"hey... thats not right", bono defends.
"dont swat at him, you evil manbitch!", jeannie says ripping his beanie off his head.
"GIVE THAT THE HELL BACK, GODDAMNIT!"
Bono's smirking and snickering up a storm stalking behind edge.
Jeannie tosses it over to Adam.
"I dont want this... bacterial trap.. thing", adam laughs tossing it on the floor.
"You bloody pieces of shite!" edge screeches once again.

The door opens and its Larry.
"Oh just feckin great. Grouchy ass is home", edge says.
"excuse me?" larry says, seeming pissy today.
"Nothing. welcome home, honey".

bono's still basking in all of this attention he's been getting and still snickering like a madman.

larry looks over at bono, "what the feck's he all giddy 'bout?"
"he's enjoying the idea of edge and jeannie fighting eachother over him. edge wants to be Mrs. Bono", adam giggles.
larry makes a face... "you people are.. very bizaare..."
"feck it edge. you gotta except the fact that i'm in love with this gorgeous lady here.. and she's in love with me", bono says scooting in next to jeannie, kissing her.
"dont make me nauseas", edge says.
"well, maybe you guys can visit a country where they allow a 3 way marriage... and y'all can all be married to eachother.." larry says.
"EW! Feck you!" edge says, putting his beanie back on after picking it up from the floor.
larry excuses himself to the bathroom...
"gonna go check your hair, gel boy?" bono teases. knowing this'll get him going. they were all in a crazy, funny mood today.
larry gives him a scowling look.. "do you want your ass re-arranged?"
bono shuts up and tries to keep a straight face.
"No, i didnt think so.... Excuse me..." larry says.
Larry was playing around. of course he wasnt really mad. lol.
then again. lol.

"is it always this crazy around here?", beatrice asked, laughing.
"Oh... yeah...", adam answered, red-faced.
"well, its either this or everyone literally at their throats and a murder about to be attempted. other than that, its a very interesting time had by all, 'round here", adam adds... being all technical about it. lol.


larry comes back out.. walks past bono and edge and smacks em both in the back of the head as he passes.
"what the feck was that for?" edge said.
bono cursing under this breath.

"nothing." larry answered.

they all start laughing as larry says, "anyways, guys.. i have to go back to meet paul again. see ya all later."
"so ya took a trip all the way back here to fix your hair for that?" bono teased.
"Look.. you scroungy, psycho man.... for the last time. I do not worry about my hair like that. now, i must be going..." larry says.
"Mhmm" bono says.
"One more word outta you and.." larry says.
"Jeannie'll kill ya if you mess with Bono, Lar", edge laughed.
jeannie gives larry a playful evil look.
"on that note.... maybe i'll leave bono be then.." larry said, ready to chuckle, pretending to be scared by jeannie.
"oh and edge, too. since edge is in love with bono as well.." adam joined in.
"HAHA!!!!" bono and jeannie crack up.
larry looks at edge and jeannie and says, "feck it. two nutters like that against one... nevermind.." lol.
"you'd be afraid to mess up your hair, l-a-r-d-e-n-c-e", bono teases.
larry holds back his rant and takes a deep breath.. "the name is.. Larry..., to you. thankyou.."
"Miss Jackson is ya nasty", edge adds. lol.
"feck you", larry says, walking out the door.

they all sigh.

"now.. this has been an interesting hour..", adam laughs.

jeannie rests her head on bono's shoulder and everything settles down.

beatrice wasn't really sure what to say around everyone.
so, bono notices this and tries breaking the awkwardness.

"So, Bea... enjoying Ireland so far?" bono asks.
"Oh yes, very much!", she said, smiling.

Adam and Karen look at eachother.

Bea and Bono strike up a convo and trying to get to know her. He wasnt sure but something was bugging Jeannie earlier after running into Bea. he wasnt sure what it was. if anything. but he still felt there was something.

"So, what do you do for a living?"
"Oh, I am a pet groomer and run my own shop.." she said smiling... thinking of her pet cat.
"I hear you have a cat!" adam said.
"yep! 4 years old. her name is Pixie"
"Aww" they all said.
"Lardence cant stand cats", bono laughs.
"hey, that gives me an idea!", edge blurts out.. ready to laugh.
they all give him a look. lol.

"yeah, Beatrice and I met a few weeks ago while I was in the States visiting the City Center in NY, actually".. bono adds. previously holding his hand over jeannies, he noticed she started gently squeezing his a little.
he looked over at her, and she seemed a little uncomfortable.
he wasnt sure if it was his asking the question or something else...
he notices adam and karen looking over, with a similar expression.
jeannie notices this and becomes even more confused.

beatrice tells the story of running into bono.. and the whole autograph thing.
karen didnt seem very suprised.. of course as she already knew the story.
edge was in shock. "how many concidences like this are gonna happen to you guys in one month.. wow.."
bono and jeannie shake their heads.
"you cant tell me there's not something very .. erm.. divine intervention-ish going on there, y'know..." edge adds.
"tell me about it. it feels like as if we've kown eachother all of our lives..", bono says, looking at jeannie, smiling right back at him.

beatrice started to reconsider telling them now. of course, everything that happened really had nothing to do with her. the fates had it for those two to be together.. she just pushed it along.
she was just worried that it might spark doubt in their minds... about her intentions or that they were just under a spell. it was just too complicated and weird to even get into. besides.. bono really didnt even know Bea.. and by the look on jeannie's face.. she seemed to be feeling a little odd discussing this.

larry comes back in, lol.
"yay, hellraiser hairgel boy is back", bono laughs.
"i need to speak to edge... now !!!" larry says.
edge looks nervous all of a sudden and bono says "ooo.. big boy's in trouuuuble now." teasing.
larry and edge give him a scowling look.

"how bout after edge and lar get done their little love fest, we all get a bite to eat?" bono suggests.
"good idea", jeannie grins.
everyone else agrees.

jeannie excuses herself to get some more sugar for her tea, and bono offers to go with her. both walking sort of funny still... from all that they were up to lastnight and this morning. ;-)

adam and karen notice this and laugh. "man... lemme guess", karen smirks.
adam smiles.. "i can only imagine".


-----

edge and larry return from their little meeting.

larry had gone back to his own place and had found a bunch of his underwear stolen. only to find out it was edge, playing pranks on him.

"stay the feck off my underwear!! do you hear?", larry says, pissy.
"will do, sir!" edge says.

"i told ya, it's always a riot 'round here..." adam laughs.

------


they all head out for dinner at this nice italian place.
the waiter comes up to them and asks if they are ready to order yet. all of them are confused and not sure what to get.
the waiter gets annoyed.

"how about you just go back home and eat some funky underwear, y'old bastard", larry struck out at edge.
bono makes a face, like 'what the hell?'
everyone in the place turns around. the waiter seems unamused, and a total lack of a sense of humor.

jeannie was drinking some water till he heard that and literally snorted water across the table... as some of it hits edge.
"all this abuse..." edge pretends to sob.

poor edge. lol.

"so, does this underwear come with spaghetti sauce or cream?" bono says, thinking he's gonna get out of this alive.

"YOU BLOODY WANKER!" edge screeches out.

"um, sorry.. but if you guys continue to be this loud, i'm gonna have to ask you to leave", the waiter says.

bono gives him a charming look, "sorry, sir. could you come back in a few minutes. hopefully we will all have decided what we want by then.."
the waiter shrugs.. again, unphased by the humor. flat-faced and droney. lol.

jeannie's snickering with karen and bono smiles. "I wonder if they allow smoking in this area.." bono thinks out loud.
"hahhaa not around me, you dont!", jeannie laughs.
"whaaaaat?" bono whines, jokingly.
"i hate smoke... i hate it..." yet oddly she found it so unbelievably sexy when he had a cigarrette.
"ah damnit. " bono pout.
edge laughs.
"besides, i would like you to be alive, and healthy! for a very long time, y'know..." jeannie adds.
bono pretends to cry, sniffling.
goddamn, he was so fucking charming. a huge grin spread across her face. but she wasn't giving in about the cig.

"alright.. fine." he gave up. lol.
jeannie smiles delightfully.. as if she'd just won an Oscar.
"yeah yeah... dont rub it in ", bono pouted.
"wow! he actually listened to someone!" edge laughed.
bono shakes his head. dying for a cigarrette.
they all laugh.

"I'm jealouuus", edge says.
"ah shut it, beanie", bono adds.
jeannie snickering.
 
LOL!! Yep, I found myself laughing out loud when writing those Edge parts, too.

Plus, from what I have heard about a few occasions that when Bono and Edge are a little.. drunk.. they tend to get that way with eachother sometimes. Well, maybe not THAT bad.. but silly like that with eachother, lol.

Its just how I've always pictured it in my head, lol.

As for the Larry thing.. haha.. i doubt that's too far-fetched at all. LOL.
 
Back
Top Bottom