It's beginning to look a lot like ECHO'S CHRISTMAS DISASTER! - U2 Feedback

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Old 11-19-2001, 03:52 PM   #1
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It's beginning to look a lot like ECHO'S CHRISTMAS DISASTER!

*Animatronic Edge carries the Christmas tree into the house.*

ECHO: Just set it down anywhere and help me get these decorations down from the attic.

*Animatronic Edge sets the tree down, next to a heater vent.*

ECHO: Edge, can you bring me the...oh, sweetie, no! You can't put the tree next to the heat like that, it's dangerous! Go move it. (She goes back down the hall.)

*Animatronic Edge looks around for a place to set the tree. There's no room by the couch, no space in front of the television. He shrugs and sets it down by where Bono is standing.*

ECHO: (Returns) Edge! I told you not to put it next to a heat source! *sigh* Bono, do me a favor and string these lights up.

*Meanwhile, Larry is tacking up the wreath on the front door. He looks at the box of thumbtacks...then looks down at his buttonless shirt....then at the thumbtacks....then at his buttonless shirt...*

LARRY: This is just crazy enough to work...

*He picks up a tack and sticks it through the buttonhole.*

LARRY: OW! Ow ow ow ow ow.

*Six hundred women jump on Larry and offer to kiss it and make it better.*

BONO: Um...can someone help me? I seem to be....stuck...here...

ECHO: Bono! I asked you to put those lights up exactly... (checks watch) two minutes and thirty-seven seconds ago! How in that time could you possibly have found yourself able to completely entangle yourself in three strings of Christmas lights?!

BONO: Well, it wasn't EASY...

*Animatronic Edge takes a glittering star from the box of ornaments and places it atop Bono's head.*

ECHO: No, sweetie, the star goes on the TREE...

LARRY: I don't know...I think Animatronic Edge has a point. (He plugs the Christmas lights in.) Wow! Hey Bono, can you hold still like that for the next five or six weeks? You know, just until all your needles start to fall off and we have to tie you to the roof of the car and take you to the city dump...

ECHO: *sigh* Larry, go check and see if there's anything left in the car. We're missing the Christmas balls and you have to put them on the tree first.

*Larry goes out to the car and retrieves the box of ornaments. He finds there's no room to set anything down.*

LARRY: I'm gonna need a place to put my bal--

*He eyes Larry Mullen's Pop Angel, Mullen Girl, and Mona suspiciously.*

LARRY: Oh no you don't. I'll be damned if I'm gonna finish that sentence.

BONO: Hey, um, can someone untangle me here?

ECHO: Are you kidding? Do you know how long Mona over there has waited to see you tied up? Mona, honey, can you not drool so much, I just shampooed the carpet.

*Larry comes in the house bearing a huge Christmas turkey.*

LARRY: I feel like I should be saying something right now...

*Larry Mullen's Pop Angel, Mullen Girl, and Mona crouch at Larry's feet, salivating.*

LARRY: Wow, I'm really at a loss for words...hmm...

BONO: Help? Someone? Anyone? Um, Animatronic Edge's kitten is over here chewing on the wire!!

*Animatronic Edge comes racing in to retrieve the naughty kitten.*

BONO: Oh thank God you're here. Can you untie me?

*Animtronic Edge looks at Bono curiously. He holds the kitten out, and it licks Bono's face.*

MONA: (To Mullen Girl) WHat I wouldn't give for a piece of the kitten's action.

BONO: Oh, man, now I'm tied up in Christmas lights AND I smell like cat breath...




------------------
*Echo* The Proud Owner of Animatronic Edge!

"Romance is dead. Turns out all this time someone had just put sunglasses
on it and propped it up in a chair." -James "Kibo" Parry

"Are you implying that I'm an internet slut?" -Bono


Bono-Man! An Epic Superhero Adventure http://www.geocities.com/bonogoestovegas

The Official PLEBA Glossary: Replacing Crippling Confusion With Mere Disorientation!
http://www.vodkatea.com/g/glossary.asp?gid=165
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Old 11-19-2001, 03:56 PM   #2
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YAY!!!!!!!
I love the kitten...awww kittens!
The unfinished sentance was priceless...oh ow...my face hurts. OUCH!! I have to stop smiling!!! Look what you've done to me!
Will there be more? Will I be in it?
*Bats her baby blues at Echo, notices this is not working and just slips her a fifty*
-Bluey

------------------
"It costs a fortune to look this trashy." - Bono.
Bluephisto
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Old 11-19-2001, 04:01 PM   #3
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Quote:
Originally posted by blueeyes:

Will there be more? Will I be in it?



*sigh* You know, me and Mona, we do and do and do for you kids...and all you want is more.



Hmm...well, Mona did suggest that one of the lads get a good basting...we'll see...


------------------
*Echo* The Proud Owner of Animatronic Edge!

"Romance is dead. Turns out all this time someone had just put sunglasses
on it and propped it up in a chair." -James "Kibo" Parry

"Are you implying that I'm an internet slut?" -Bono


Bono-Man! An Epic Superhero Adventure http://www.geocities.com/bonogoestovegas

The Official PLEBA Glossary: Replacing Crippling Confusion With Mere Disorientation!
http://www.vodkatea.com/g/glossary.asp?gid=165
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Old 11-19-2001, 04:48 PM   #4
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LMAO ... this totally seems like a scene from when I put up my Christmas Tree. Oany a time have I gotten tangled up in the Christmas lights. My family has a good laught at my expense.

And I love the adventures of Animatronic Edge and his kitten.

------------------
Jessica

"Rock and roll doggie"
--Bono

"I'm very secure with the fact that I'm not black. I'm white, pink and rosy. But I've got soul."
--Bono

“We make music you can have sex to.”
--Bono

“Never trust a man who tells you it's from the heart, never trust a man smoking a cigar, never trust a cowboy or a man who wears shades.”
--Bono

[This message has been edited by JessicaAnn (edited 11-19-2001).]
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Old 11-19-2001, 09:05 PM   #5
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LMAO GIRLIES!!!!!!!

*rolls on the floor laughing* ahhh ya'll kill me I swear!

*MG eyes Larry*

MullenGirl: Can I help you with your balls Larry?

Larry:*snarl* What?

Edge&AE:*bluuuuuuuuush*

MullenGirl: Yeah do you need some help with your balls? You know I could hold them for you

Larry:*silent*

Bono:Let the girl touch your balls Larry!

Edge&AE:*bluuuuuuuuuuuuuuush*

*MG holds Larry's Christmas balls*

MullenGirl: I meant these you dirty minded girlies

Everyone: Ohhh

------------------
The U2 revolution has been reinstated.

THE Larry Mullen Jr. Page
http://www.geocities.com/kiti_regia/index.html

Meeting Larry:
*MG shows Larry poster*
*Larry reads poster*
*Larry smiles and says "Thank you that's very nice of you"*
*Larry signs paper, shakes MG's hand*
*MG almost dies then sees tearaway pants and gets bad ideas*
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Old 11-19-2001, 09:36 PM   #6
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*the lights go out*

EDGE: No, I SWEAR it wasn't my fault this time. I didn't touch ANYthing....hey what're we having for dinner? I brought my carve-atron!

BONO: First of all...I think I may have short--

LARRY: Ay, you're QUITE short!

BONO: I might have shorted a fuse somewhere. Secondly.....EDGE YOU'RE NOT EVEN IN THE STORY!!!!

EDGE: Sorry.

LARRY: Where'd I put my balls?!

EDGEBOT: *is scandalized*

MullenGirl: ...what're you guys lookin at ME for?

LARRY: Someone needs to fix the lights. I can't find me balls!

MullenGirl: Need help?!

LARRY: Eh..no....

EDGEBOT: *his green eyes are shining, glowing in the dark*

BONO: Echo, get Edgebot's dumb cat away from me!

ECHO: ....Edgebot is holding the cat right now....

BONO: Well, SOMEthing's licking--

ECHO: Aw, shoot. Where's Mona?

BONO: Em....I think I know....

EDGEBOT: *blush*

LARRY: Bono, have you seen my balls?

POPANGEL: WHOA.....whatever youse guys do in your own time is none of our--

MULLENGIRL: YES it is.

BONO: My hands are tied.

LARRY: My body's bruised.....feckin thumbtacks

BONO: Mona's...got me with....

ECHO: Stop it! We've got to finish getting everything ready.

BONO: It's still pretty dark....and...scandalous....over here anyway....*falls down and is still wrapped up in wires like a tamale*

MULLENGIRL: There's something stiff poking me.

EVERYONE: BONO! CONTROL YOURSELF!

BONO: Listen, blokes! I'm on the floor tied up in Christmas lights, and Mona is trying to defile me. Does it LOOK like I'm-- o wait. Yes. Yes, I am elevated. *sigh* When am I NOT elevated?

MULLENGIRL: Oh, it was just cardboard Adam...sorry...

LARRY: Edgebot, you have a built-in light feature, correct? OK Let's find me balls.

*they creep around the room*

LARRY: Aw feck, I still have the turkey. I need to put it down.

EDGEBOT: *little does anyone know, the real Edge tried to install a voice chip in Edgebot, who has since been practicing a little ventriloquism act. He can throw his voice, but this feature will probably break down soon anyway. Edge took a mushroom break in the middle of installing it* Turky turkey love you turkey....WHO WANTS ME MEAT?

MULLENGIRL: Whaaaat?! Now I'm starvin'

LARRY: What? I didn't say anything. Stop looking at me. Let me find my balls in peace.....

EDGEBOT: Turkey turky love me turkey Who wants to *baste* me?

*ALL GIRLS PRESENT CLOSE IN ON LARRY....except for Mona, who is trying to write 'tamale' on a sock and tie it around Bono's eyes and saying BASTE ME, BABY!*

LARRY: I didn't say that! I just want me-- o look, there they are! Careful, don't step on me balls!

GIRLS: *drooool*

EDGEBOT: Let me *baste* you! HOO-AH!

LARRY: That doesn't even SOUND like me! *drops turkey* Aw feck it all to heck.

EDGEBOT: Lettuce lettuce baste you lettuce....

GIRLS: We're so in LUST with Larry, we don't even care that that DOESN'T make sense!

BONO: Lawrence! Quick! I know how to fight them off!

LARRY: HOW?! QUICK!!!!

BONO: Make 'em faint! Make em drool and faint! Works with Moner all the time!

MONA: *is passed out*

BONO: She took one look at me with the blindfold and fell over like Edge in the Stuck video!

EDGEBOT: *the voice is cracking up* BASTE ME LET ME BASTE YOU BASTE ME LET ME BASTE YOU

LARRY: *in one quick motion he tears away his tearaway pants* BEHOLD!!!!!!!! THE MAN GROOVE IN ALL ITS GLORY!!!!!!!!!

GIRLS: *faint*

LARRY: Alright. Who has my meat? Em...Bono, could you help me roll MullenGirl and PopAngel of me balls?

EDGEBOT: *blush*

------------------
~*Mona*~
97% compatible with Bono

Love me, give me soul.

You want to be the song
Be the song that you hear in your head

[This message has been edited by WildHonee (edited 11-19-2001).]
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Old 11-19-2001, 09:48 PM   #7
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Wow, I scandalized mySELF with that one...

*hides*

*baste*

------------------
~*Mona*~
97% compatible with Bono

Love me, give me soul.

You want to be the song
Be the song that you hear in your head
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Old 11-19-2001, 10:34 PM   #8
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LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!

OMFG!!!!!!!!

That is so hilarious!!!!!! My stomach hurts from laughing so hard and i'm like crying too...oh gawd that's too funny *tries to catch breath*



------------------
The U2 revolution has been reinstated.

THE Larry Mullen Jr. Page
http://www.geocities.com/kiti_regia/index.html

Meeting Larry:
*MG shows Larry poster*
*Larry reads poster*
*Larry smiles and says "Thank you that's very nice of you"*
*Larry signs paper, shakes MG's hand*
*MG almost dies then sees tearaway pants and gets bad ideas*
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Old 11-20-2001, 08:39 PM   #9
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! Echo made me read all kinds of scandalizing FanFic.

As revenge, I subject you all to Echo's and my *scandalizing* material
*BUMP*

------------------
~*Mona*~
97% compatible with Bono

Love me, give me soul.

You want to be the song
Be the song that you hear in your head
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Old 12-29-2001, 01:39 PM   #10
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*bump* I should've bumped this a few days ago. Oopsie

------------------
~*Mona*~ Secretary of Scandalization
97% compatible with Bono


"Bono was embraced as rock's latest mystic leader, a sort of holy cross between the Morrisons, Jim and Van"

"There were moments when Bono even earned cheers for simply loosening his shirt"

"Listen....I could be a genius if I weren't so lazy"
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Old 12-30-2001, 02:05 AM   #11
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Now, that was feckin' hilarious.... OHMYWORD.... thanks, girlies...

(impatiently tapping foot.... so when am *I* going to be in one of your cool little stories???? <evil grin> ) LOL!

Moonie

------------------
If you ask me, I think it's all about drums.
*************************
"If a student with an accordion had come along, I would've played with them ya know...that was where I was at, I was that desperate to play with somebody."
(Larry, about his Mount Temple days, before forming U2)

*Larry, I played accordion. Can I have a drumstick?*
From the heart, on a blue sign, 11-18-01, Vegas

*************************
Tonight the moon has drawn its curtains
It's a private show no one else going to know
I'm wanting

(If You Wear That Velvet Dress)
*************************
Hit Gurl
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Old 12-30-2001, 02:17 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally posted by Echo:


Hmm...well, Mona did suggest that one of the lads get a good basting...we'll see...

hey! i get 30% credit for alll food-related humor.
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