youvedonewhat
Rock n' Roll Doggie Band-aid
Ok, I'm so totally bored that I came up with this:
So you're out shopping alone. You've done all the shops and now you need to go sink a coffee/tea. All the cafe's are full. You trail for the next half hour looking for somewhere that's not heaving with bodies.
At last, you find a cafe that doesn't look too bad although it's almost full. So you go in. Order yourself a coffee and look round to find somewhere to park yer weary arse.
There's only one seat that you can see:
It's by the window. The other seat is occupied by some bloke with his head stuck in a book. You don't see his face as it's hidden, so you mosey on over, ask politely 'is this seat taken?'. The guy lowers his book, flashes you his most devastating smile, you know the one: the face splitting grin that causes your heat to miss a beat.
Yes..
It's the B.
He sez, ' no. Help yourself' So you park your arse wishing you'd made more of an effort to look good and begin to sip your drink. You can feel his eyes on you. You know that he's in the mood to yak. So, yeah, you can live with that. You strike up a conversation, enjoying the company and the coffee when suddenly a shadow falls over you. The B stops talking. You look up.
...and there's Larry, giving it his hardest scowl. (He doesn't mean it, he just wants to see how you react).
"Bono." He sez, "I thought I told you to save my seat."
....so, what do you do?
Slurp your coffee/tea back in one hit and say: It's ok, I'm going now?
Allow a sly look to slip across your face and suggest that as there's no free seats he can always park his fine arse upon your knee?
Suggest he sits down and you sit on his knee?
Scowl at Bono and suggest he gives up his seat as he's finished his coffee and he's only reading his book anyways?
So you're out shopping alone. You've done all the shops and now you need to go sink a coffee/tea. All the cafe's are full. You trail for the next half hour looking for somewhere that's not heaving with bodies.
At last, you find a cafe that doesn't look too bad although it's almost full. So you go in. Order yourself a coffee and look round to find somewhere to park yer weary arse.
There's only one seat that you can see:
It's by the window. The other seat is occupied by some bloke with his head stuck in a book. You don't see his face as it's hidden, so you mosey on over, ask politely 'is this seat taken?'. The guy lowers his book, flashes you his most devastating smile, you know the one: the face splitting grin that causes your heat to miss a beat.
Yes..
It's the B.
He sez, ' no. Help yourself' So you park your arse wishing you'd made more of an effort to look good and begin to sip your drink. You can feel his eyes on you. You know that he's in the mood to yak. So, yeah, you can live with that. You strike up a conversation, enjoying the company and the coffee when suddenly a shadow falls over you. The B stops talking. You look up.
...and there's Larry, giving it his hardest scowl. (He doesn't mean it, he just wants to see how you react).
"Bono." He sez, "I thought I told you to save my seat."
....so, what do you do?
Slurp your coffee/tea back in one hit and say: It's ok, I'm going now?
Allow a sly look to slip across your face and suggest that as there's no free seats he can always park his fine arse upon your knee?
Suggest he sits down and you sit on his knee?
Scowl at Bono and suggest he gives up his seat as he's finished his coffee and he's only reading his book anyways?
hmm and yes my arms have to be around your neck... 
I would then play off whatever Larry or Bono said next, but if neither one said anything, or if I felt I was interrupting things, I'd tell Bono how much I enjoyed talking with him, and leave. 
